Posted: Thu Jan 8, 2009 9:52 PM CST
The black cuff
Its 3;43am in Glasgow and its exactly 8 days since my grandpa passed on .He stayed with us till the early morn of the new year .I was the only one in the room when he took his last breath and i swear i still hear it when i close my eyes at night ,so im not sleeping .
I miss him so much that i dont actually think its sank in yet ,but the 2 bottles of wine iv had tell me other wise .Im pissed and pissed ,he was like a second daddy to me ,taught me to play pool ,and how to cheat at dominoes .I got my first sip of beer from him and my first bb gun .He watched me grow up along with my other 42 cousins from his own 13 children and now i cant look at any of them without feeling like im about to break .I know im not the only one but still it hurts .
Im not really sure why im still writing ,not got much to say now .Could you just for a second tho do as im doing ? close your eyes and wish him a safe journey .I know you dont know me or him ,but just the thought of him being alone is killing me and id like to think he knows that somewhere out there others care .
Take care people ,and dont forget to go visit someone who may need it 
Posted: Fri Dec 26, 2008 9:18 PM CST
Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 3:22 AM CST
Calorie-burning activities (a joke)
Proper weight control cannot be attained by dieting alone; however, many people who are engaged in sedentary occupations do not realize that calories can be burned by the hundreds by engaging in strenuous activities that do not require much (or any) physical exercise.
Here's the guide to calorie-burning activities and the number of calories per hour they consume.
Beating around the bush . . . . . . . . .75
Jumping to conclusions . . . . . . . . . 100
Climbing the walls . . . . . . . . . . . 150
Swallowing your pride. . . . . . . . . .50
Passing the buck . . . . . . . . . . . .25
Pushing your luck. . . . . . . . . . . 250
Making mountains out of molehills. . . 500
Hitting the nail on the head . . . . . .50
Bending over backwards . . . . . . . . .75
Running around in circles. . . . . . . 350
Climbing the ladder of success . . . . 650
Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 1:09 PM CST
Headlines
The news has been playing the same story for the past 2 weeks now ,
"Tonight's the night the world will end "
Iv been up since 9:00 am trying to do normal things but my mind keeps wondering if it could be true .
I plan in my head how i want to go ,where i want to be and who i want with me but i cant stop the voice of reason telling me to behave .
My son has turned 4 months today ,i watch him sleep and feel shivers run up my spine . So young and helpless ,will his life end before it starts ? i shake off the bad feelings and make my way to the sitting room where i can see if there is any updates .Cole is due home soon ,i know he will understand why i have made a plan ,i know he will hold me .
We have 1 hour till the world ends ,im lying in bed in cole's arms with our son placed between us .I cant stop my tears as small as they are . I love them both so much ,i cant believe i could lose them .
We have 10 minutes left. im wrapped around cole as if i am trying to climb inside him ,my hearts beating so hard and loud i wonder if he can hear it .
"Cole ?" i whisper "i love you but if im wrong about this im also sorry"
he laughs gently his breath fanning my face "its ok ,really, the main thing is we are together"
He kisses my eyes and tears while i sob like a child ,our sons snores the only noise in-between my silences .
We wait ..............
The moment has passed ,nothing happened .Im so relieved but feel silly too ,i place my 2 hands on either side of Coles face and kiss him
"lets go make food" i smile and laugh nervously "the world didn't end after all ,i wonder what will be in the news tomorrow ?" .
Wrote this when i was 15 ,see how enthusiastic i was about life ? and yes its rough but i wanted to type it the way i wrote it all those years ago
Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 3:41 PM CST
The Dark One ......
He was gorgeous . Hair as dark as midnight ,eyes so green they glowed .He wore a black shirt opened just enough at the collar to show you the long line of his neck .He stands up and turns his back to the table of people hes been sitting with and looks around the room ,he can feel me watching Im sure .
He makes his way over to the bar at the far end of this large overheated room and I watch him ,I watch the way his thighs stretch his jeans tight the way he leans towards the barman and says something to him ,the way the barman nods back ,but hes already turned away . I know he is looking for me now due to my hard stare . He looks over at me but doesn't move on like I hope ,I can feel him staring while I fumble in my bag willing my nerves to settle down and peeping at him through my lowered lashes .I decide to leave so I flip my bag on my arm and make a beeline for the door .
I sigh with relief and disappointment ,the cold hits me as I open the door to the bar and I quickly grab the two sides of my jacket in my fist to give me some protection from the harsh wind. I know I could get a cab quicker if I walk to the end of the street ,so I turn from under the bars front shelter ,but cant take a step as a large hand is on my shoulder .
I spin round knowing but not knowing who it is ,my breath stills and he stares at me ,watching my mouth ,my eyes .
He whispers "are you alone "
"Yes," I whisper back wondering how I can hear him over the wind.
"Come" he words at me taking my hand .
I follow not understanding why and not caring either .He leads me to a car as black as everything about him ,opening the door for me he beckons me inside ......… I hesitate .......... im not scared strangely enough im very calm and thats what makes me worry .
"Come" he whispers again "I want you too"
I step inside and feel relieved to get out of the wind .He sits down and shuts the door ,the cars light goes out but the street lamps keep us illuminated .
He doesn't speak a word the whole short journey but I know he's watching and listening .We pull up at a house all windows and stone ,but I dont take in the scenery , Im too aware of the man on my left .
He reaches for me and pulls me gentle out of the car ,his hand is warm in mine .I stumble on the strange ground and shakily make my way across the cobbled path to the front door with his large hand still holding mine ,I wonder how his hands can be so warm on a night so cold .
Opening the door without a sound he leads me up a set a winding stairs ,its dark and no lights can be seen under the doors in the hall but the moon lights our way .He stops at a door ,dark wood and carved with intricate patterns ,and turns to face me reaching out for my other hand .
"I will not let anything happen to you ,so do not worry little one " his voice like velvet in my ears .
Leading me inside ,the door bumps shut quietly ,I shudder ,he looks at me and places his firm hands on my shoulder .I want to look at the room ,to see the space Iv invaded but I cant tear my eyes from his .
I know he wants me to kiss him ,I want him to kiss me . My legs are so stiff and my hands ache with clenching them so tight but I want him to kiss me .
"Smile" he says to me then leans in .............. WHAM he rams his tongue down my throat and gags me ,I choke and splutter ,my legs go weak and threaten to cave in ,I feel dizzy and light headed and just know if I dont get oxygen soon il die with his face down my throat . Spurred on by his sucking noises I quickly grab his arms with my hands ........ drop to the floor ,roll ,race to the door ,yank it open and flee like the wind .
I got home in time for superman returns .