Posted: Wed Jul 1, 2009 10:25 PM CST
Long Distance romance
In my love life, I have mostly stuck close to home. I had only one somewhat long-distance relationship-150 miles. Its too bad that the practical difficulties of long-distance are intimidating, since there are some really hot-looking women here who live far from my own North America. I am curious to know if anybody has tried the long-distance thing and made it work.
Posted: Fri Jun 19, 2009 12:30 AM CST
Overcoming fear of rejection
This advice can be used by both men and women. I do not pretend to be an expert, only someone with opinions.
If you approach someone and they don't want anything to do with you, don't take it as meaning that there is something wrong with you. You might not be their type, or they had a bad day. Just move on.
Also, if you get no as an answer, don't become a stalker, just go away. I know that in comedies and chick flicks, a common theme is the persistent guy who relentlessly pursues the girl and finally wins her, but in real life that's not how it works. In real life, its at best annoying, and at worst frightening.
Posted: Wed Jun 17, 2009 10:41 AM CST
Love in the wasteland
In the America of 2009, the old dreams have been shattered. Fewer and fewer people are working, and people are lucky if their houses are worth half of what they paid for them. A lot of banks and brokerage companies got rich lending people more than they could afford to repay, and now that they, AIG, Ameriquest, Goldman Sachs are going broke, we are going to be heavily taxed to rescue them.
They call it a recession, but that is a pale euphemism. I think its better to call it a hangover after the party ends. Your head aches, one of the tables and two chairs lie splintered on the floor, and the carpet reeks of vomit.
What a long, strange episode its been. A lot of the suburban fantasy life will have to go. There are so many businesses in my area catering to fussing with appearance- tanning parlors, car detailing, botox, gyms. How will they survive when people have trouble affording groceries?
I still look for love in the midst of this wasteland. People will have to adjust their expectations to a narrowing, shrinking world. I find that a lot of the men on this dating site can only get replies from women who are very overweight or much older than them, and the men seem equally superficial. Extra points go for blonde hair and long legs, and any profiles that show a bit of cleavage get enormous attention. A lot of the guys seem to have the tastes of drunk,troll-like Japanese businessmen on a sex
tour of Bangkok.
Face reality people, if you are over 30 and have never been married, you are too picky. I know, I was one. I didn't get married until I was middle-aged, and it still didn't work out.
The right person is there for all of you if you learn to appreciate a person's character and soul, and ignore superficial things.
Posted: Tue Jun 16, 2009 3:12 PM CST
Looking for the silver lining in the cloud.
It's hard to launch myself into the single world after 18 years of marriage, but I will hold my head up and stay positive and keep a sense of humor. I do have a job, not a good one, but a very secure one. Right now, with unemployment nationally, at 9.4% and rising, how many people have what I consider a secure job, in the European or Japanese or Civil service sense- something that you have legal rights to, which can only be lost after a very expensive buyout? Not too many people.
I have a decent relationship with my kids. I am separated, not divorced. In a very odd way, our society has made a fetish out of codifying and agonizing over the exact stage and status of relationships, and who is available and not available. Maybe this is a way to make sense out of what I see as a world that has gone increasingly crazy. So someone who has not legally severed the last link with the ex is taboo to many.