Posted: Thu Oct 23, 2008 6:09 PM CST
A Friendship That's Finally Ended
This is the third blog I've posted on here about this "friend" of mine of the last ten years. Well our friendship finally came to an end today. Like I stated in my other blogs, I started dating one of my best friends. She was coming out of an abusive two year relationship. I was hesitant at first because I didn't want to be a rebound with her, but we ended up getting together. Well we broke up and she changed dramatically. She started hanging out with her ex boyfriend again who was physically and verbally abusive to her. She lied about being raped by him and his friend at one of their houses. She's pushed me away and ruined our friendship. We'll as a lot of people do, I communicate to a lot of my friends using myspace and she was on my friends list. Well she told me that she was feeling sick. So I was running errands around where she lives so I went and got her some flowers and drove by her place to check in with. She was there and she accepted my flowers and reached out to me give me a hug. We talked for a good ten minutes and I left. She seemed fine and she said she was ok with me stopping by. So, I get home and jumped on MySpace. Well she had deleted me from her friends list and blocked me. She told me she felt uncomfortable around me. I said, "You feel uncomfortable around me?" "You hangout with someone that bodychecked you into a wall and you are uncomfortable around me?" I'd be lying if I didn't say that it didn't hurt my feelings that she's done this, but at the same time, there is something deeply wrong with her. I tried to help her. I told her to get counseling but she just wouldn't. She seems to like abusive relationships and a lot of drama. And even though what she's done is wrong, I feel bad for her and I hope she get's help before it's too late. I still love after everything because she was my first true love and we go back ten years. I just hope she's doing ok.
Posted: Wed Oct 22, 2008 4:07 PM CST
What Is So Appealing About The Bad Boys?
This is the second blog I've posted on here. I'm not much for blogging but I found the responses from my last blog helpful, so here goes nothing? I guess this question is more for the ladies but what is so appealing about the bad boy? If any of you remember me from my last post, I was having some issues with a best friend of mine who I decided to start dating. Well things just didn't work out for a number of reasons. One of those reason is her ex's. Now she says that there's nothing going on, that she has no feelings for him. Yet she'll hang around him and will not hangout with me. Now her ex, he's a real piece of work. He's been physically and verbally abusive to her. Even when me and her were just friends and I was supportive of their relationship, he didn't want us being friends. I even called her a few weekends ago and she out with him and some couple they used to hangout with and he answered the phone saying, "Jessyca doesn't want you to call her anymore." I talked to her about this and she swears she had nothing to do with it and that she talked to him about it. She dated this guy for two years and she finally broke up with him when he body checked her into a wall. Yet, for some reason she thinks that there's some friendship there that she needs to save. I don't quite understand. I've always been by her side through the bad times with this guy and yet I get cast aside. We aren't really talking too much now. Our friendship is just kind of falling apart. So once again I will ask, what is so appealing about the bad boy?
Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 5:09 PM CST
Why Is It So Hard To Let Go
I've had a friend of over ten years that I recently broke up with. It's been a very difficult time for me as a result. She was someone I really cared for and now we can barely speak to one another. It all started in January of this year. She was with her boyfriend at the time who she really didn't want to be with any longer according to her. At the time we were talking over MySpace but she gave me her cell number and we started talking over the phone. Now I had not seen her in a few years. I've know her since the fifth grade but our freshmen year of high school she transfered and I transfered so we lost contact with each other. I went to culinary school and finally came back home. I found her on MySpace and we began chatting. We let's get back to January. Like I said, at the time she was unhappy with her situation and wanted out. The more and more we talked, the closer we got. Well, finally one day she told me that she had feelings for me and that she no longer wanted to be with him, instead she wanted to be with me. Well, I have to be honest, I wasn't going to turn her down. I was very attracted her and cared for as a friend. I had always hoped that our paths would cross and maybe someday we could date. Well, needless to say, two days after that conversation she broke up with him and then a few days later, she got back together with him. Well, I was hurt by it all. I mean, why tell me that you want to be with me if you are going to go back to him? Well, I let her go. I got back to my life as it had been before all of that talk had started. Well a few months later, she breaks up with him and we start talking again. I had not spoken to her in months as a result of what she did. Once again the subject of us dating came up. I was hesitant again, but not for the same reasons. I didn't want to get hurt again by her and I thought that she might need some time to heal before getting involved with me. For me, I knew that I did not want to be any kind of rebound for her. She assured me that she was ok so we preceded to carry on with our relationship. We went out, talked for hours on the phone every night. I became very attached to her, basically I feel in love with her. You may be wondering how that could happen so soon, well you are not alone. I wondered that myself, but I can honestly say that I did/do love her. Well a few weeks went by, things seemed fine. I spent the day with her at her house. We hung out, cuddled, held hands and I kissed her good-bye. We had a great time that day. Well two days later, things go from good to bad real quickly. We broke up. I had never been more hurt. I was very confused as to what had happened. Well, a few days later she and her ex were hanging out with some of his friends who are a couple and something happened that night. I can't go into detail but needless to say she called me needing to talk to someone. Well, I managed to pull her through the situation and we were talking for a while but once again things got bad to the point where she pretty much has shut me out of her life and now is talking to her ex and those people again. She told me so many times that she was done with those people, only to find herself talking to them again. It hurts so bad that I of all people have been pushed away after everything I've done for her. All the times she needed someone, I was there. I feel betrayed and down right, disrespected. Yet, even after the way she has done me, I can't help but love her. I can't let her go just yet. One of the reason is, she won't tell me what is really going on with her. I need some closure to the issue and I don't want to walk away without an explaination. Am I wrong for feeling like this? Should I just walk away from it all and just let her continue downward spiral? Does love just make you this stupid?