Ending a relationship is one of the hardest things we have to face in life. No matter who you are it will happen to you sooner or later. You might have begun to realize that this person is not the person you thought they were when you first met. So how do you move on without hurting the other person too badly?
You first need to realize that you are doing the right thing. If you are ending the relationship you have seen too many red flags. There may have been behavior you won’t stand for or maybe there is just no spark of excitement there. Life is too short to be with the wrong person simply in order to avoid being alone. Know that there is a person out there that was made just for you.
You owe it to the other person to meet them in person and tell them of your decision. Pick a nice neutral place to meet and share your feelings. Don’t have them at your home and don’t go to theirs. Meeting at a neutral place means that you won’t get involved in any intimate behavior that you will regret later.
A good rule of thumb is to take as much blame as possible. Your goal is to move on. There is no need to hurt another individual. You can say something as simple as "I have been thinking and I believe I am not the person you deserve in your life." It’s also advisable to let the person know that you have learned a lot about yourself through this experience. Let them know that you truly will treasure the times you have spent together. If the person has a hard time accepting the news simply apologize again. The next step is to restate that you are simply not the right person for them. Your goal is to be kind but firm in your decision to move on.
You may be pressed by the person you are ending the relationship with for a reason. Stay positive and kind. The best thing to say is "I feel that there is someone out there with better chemistry for you then me."
Remaining friends with the other person should only be an option if you are sure that they won’t use this friendship as an excuse for staying in your life. Sometimes people want to remain friends because they secretly believe they can change your mind regarding the relationship. The best thing to do is simply move on by making a clean break from the other person. Making a clean break forces the other person to go on to another relationship prospect.
You may want to let all your calls from this person go to your answering machine for the next few weeks. It’s best to not return calls. The sane person soon realizes it’s over and then they move on.
Whatever you do don’t continue to have sex with someone you have ended a relationship with. Many times people use that as a way of trying to convince themselves you still care. It’s simply not worth it in the long run.
Do not dwell on what went wrong. Use the things you have learned in this relationship to benefit you. Long-term relationships take a lot of work. If your heart says it’s over then it’s over. Move on joyfully to the next relationship.