Surviving the Breakup: Rules to Live By

The weeks immediately following a breakup are some of the toughest days in the life of someone who was dumped. Your mind is still in the process of digesting the reality of the breakup, and every little thing that you see reminds you of your ex. You get crazy ideas once in a while, and you find yourself pondering if you should fight for the relationship or just move on. It is a tough situation to be in, but for your own good you have to pick up the pieces and get on with your life. Here are some tips on how to survive after a nasty breakup:

Tip Number One: You Are Not Alone

Your partner may have dumped you on your birthday, right after you lost your job, at your grandmother's funeral, or after you finished writing your term paper. Whatever the case may be, you will always feel that the breakup happened in the worst possible time. You have to realize that there is no perfect time to break up with somebody. When it happens, you will feel emotional and your mind will relate the event to anything remotely significant. This situation happens all the time to almost everyone who experiences a breakup. You are not alone.

Tip Number Two: Keep Distance

Opening your lines of communication with your ex will lead to complications. A simple text message, tweet, or Facebook comment may bring the two of you together. You may find yourself having coffee or having a dinner date. If you happen to talk about getting back together and resolve all of your conflicts then that would be great. However, most "post-breakup hookups" end up disastrously. You and your ex may have different expectations. You may want to patch things up while he may simply want to spend the night with you. Keeping distance will spare you from this uncomfortable situation.

Sleeping with your ex is a big mistake. It will stir up emotions that you should be forgetting and will make moving on more difficult for you. You will end up wanting him back and the feeling may not be mutual.

A good rule of thumb is to be on the low down for at least half the amount of time that you were together, or until you have finally moved on with somebody else. Never initiate contact when you are still feeling emotional. In the meantime, you can unsubscribe from his social networking sites and delete his phone number.

Tip Number Three: Ignorance is Bliss

It is tempting to ask around or check online to see how your ex is doing. You are curious if he has moved on with his life or if he is as miserable as you are. You want to know if he is seeing somebody else. You have a million questions that you want answered. Knowing what is going on with your ex will only lead to sleepless nights. You will undoubtedly go crazy if you find out that he has been dating other people and enjoying life without you. You have nothing to gain in keeping yourself updated with his personal affairs. It will only make things more difficult for you. You will have a harder time moving on and forgetting.

Tip Number Four: It's Time to be Selfish

You need to start feeling good about yourself. It is time to be selfish and to do things that will make you happy. This is the best time to reinvent yourself and to work on achieving things that you were not able to do when you were in a relationship. Focus on getting a promotion at work, learning a sport that you are curious about, or going to a place that you have never been to before. The best revenge is becoming a better and more successful person.

Breakups are difficult but you have to realize that it is not the end of the world. You need to find yourself in the process and pull yourself together. Avoid the most common mistakes that other people make and focus on making yourself happier.