Societies across the globe have set separate standards for the sexes, deeming some behaviors appropriate for males to be intolerable for women. Slowly over the centuries, most countries have been chipping away at these often unfair gender expectations to make way for new ideas. There are many areas where we can still see the outright double standard, one of which is the affair.
What makes a man’s affair more acceptable than a women’s and will that mind set ever change? It all comes down to evolution. Men and women are different and that goes without saying. However, it’s not just the way we use the bathroom, or the mechanics of our bodies that make us different, it’s in our brains.
While advancements in society have given women the ability to play a role equal to men; we will never be men. If we’re so equal then why do we want to have a man in the first place? Instinctively, women want to feel protected, comforted and loved. Women want to feel safe and taken care of, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. It’s simply the way the way our minds work. When a man has an affair, his partner can often get over it because his affair didn’t affect his ability to protect her. Women can often accept an affair by thinking that “he doesn’t love the other woman, he’s just using her.” That’s not to say that every woman will. However, despite all our centuries of evolution and societal advancements, we still cling to the basic needs that out ancestors started out with so long ago.
Still wonder what makes it so outrageously unacceptable for a woman to have an affair? Men started out with basic instincts too, and that is to pass on their seed. If a woman has an affair, there’s no guarantee whose child she will have. A man needs to know that his blood line will go on. It may not make sense now, with birth control and paternity tests, but it’s what drives our species to procreate and continue to exist.
Every creature on earth starts out with some basic instincts. Animals go on with life, following their built in road map. It can be hard for people to do the same. We’ve grown to a point where we need to understand our actions and feelings, separating emotion from logic.
Despite all the logic in the world, we haven’t yet managed to entirely shut down these basic instincts. Which is a good thing, because if a woman didn’t want a man for protection, and a man didn’t desire a woman for procreation then would we not eventually dwindle out of existence? Perhaps one day we’ll grow to the point where affairs are a thing of the past. Until then, it’s our basic needs and instincts that make society turn a blind eye to a man’s fling, while tagging women as immoral sluts.