Posted:Sun Feb 1, 2009 3:45 PM CST
No Escape
Euri lingers in the depths of my soul.I`ve tried to forget-yet there is somone who reminds me of him.The son he didn`t know he had,yet he wanted a son with me...He never knew that you were his father,but one day ,he had guessed.I could`nt explain,but he understood,because he is a man,now.He has the same smile you had,& your long creative fingers,& even the slim tall body,too.All of that etched in my mind,& heart,& what could have been.How can I forget,that you tried to shelter me from violent abuse.I was helpless,because of my children...they had to come first.-Make love to me,I told him.He didn`t know,I had to leave...You had put your lips softly on mine,& had turned me around,to dance with me,only a day ago.Two days before,we planned a future together.That day,I had made up my mind,I lay on a single bed that we shared,& I felt something moist on my forehead,then my lips,like gentle raindrops.He must have crept in,leaving the hospital,where he worked.He sprinkled white & pink rose petals all over me,& put a soft Valentine`s bear into my arms.I didn`t notice the ring,on a chain around the bear`s neck.He slipped it on my finger knowing I could only wear it when I was with him...He looked deep into my eyes,with his beautiful blue eyes,& kissed me so softly,then gathered me up in his arms,& said he bought another ring too.-"Marry me".I cradled the bear,& thought of my children.I wanted to,but I didn`t say anything.He knew I wanted to.We loved being with each other.He was an extention of myself.But I knew I had to go....Touch me,one more time,I said.It was then that I told him,that I had to go back.NO,NO,NO.....you can`t.But you know I have to.-My husband will never let me go.He`ll kill you.I can take care of myself,he told me.You don`t understand,I said...Euri reminded me,"He`ll keep hurting you".,he told me.I knew I would never have any peace.Then the taxi came,I remember him at the top of the stairs,with tears streaming down his cheeks.By the time I tried to reach him,he was already in Sweden.My letter crossed with another,from the attorney that raised him,when his parents died, telling me my beloved Euri was killed in an avalanche,& froze to death.I carry a burden still.He didn`t come after me.He knew I had to go.......