Posted:Sat Mar 7, 2009 6:37 AM CST
This weak in Adelaide. Vol 1 Num 1
Welcome to the inaugural "This weak in Adelaide" blog. A sporadic rhetoric that should put even the most hardened insomniac to sleep within minutes. Exclusive to our friends at Connecting Singles. I should warn you up front however. If you are a prude, have a weak constitution or even just a weak bladder, you might not want to read any further. I am in fact the very guy your mother warned you about. We yetis are the things that went bump in the night when you were a kid. Remember that night when you wet yourself. That was me. So I suggest if you must persist in reading this, you should go to the toilet now. We'll all wait.
So now that we're all relieved, it's on with the blog.
Now as you'll recall from last week's episode, a Malfunction caused the Torrens lake weir to open and let all the water out. Flushing tons of blue/green algae down stream and poisoning years of good work in the wetlands they painstakingly created. Apparently a 6 foot mutant water fowl has been spotted down around the Lockleys area but I suspect it's just one of my relatives out for a stroll along the bike track. Probably just Uncle Dick on the way home from one of his many raping and pillaging pranks. He's such a laugh is ol' uncle Dick.
But anyway, The Torrens lakes are now being filled up again using the last remaining drop of water from the River Murray. The Lard Mayor will be happy now. He said it was all the fault of terrorists so I guess that justifies terrorizing our last remaining major water ways. Obviously he wanted to use the last remaining gigalitre of water before anyone else did. Otherwise he might have let them plant the flora required to stop the Torrens lake turning back into the poisonous sewer is it noted for. And what a world class sewer it is. So picturesque.
You'll be pleased to know that Captain Jollie's Popeye boats are all now re-floated so you can all take your kids out for a joy ride on the lake again. All whilst preying for around 30 minutes that the ol' tubs don't spring a leek so that your child might see his 3rd birthday.
And now for the forecast.
No love has exploded, blossomed or bloomed in the last 7 days in the Adelaide metropolitan area. The bureau of meteorology expects conditions to remain dry and unappealing like our water supply for the remaining week. Where upon that sinking feeling will set in just like our local economy. Good to see there's some synergy there at least.
I'd give you the sports news but nothing has been happening in the bedroom for 20 years so why would you expect something to start now? Stand by now for the weak that was.
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