the opening
I am writing a story, I still don't know whether it will be a short story, novelet, novel. It's only the opening. I'd like to share with you all, as I'd like to know whether this opening is catchy enough to get your attention. Will it make you curios and keep on reading, or you think it's boring.So here I am, with a man whom (I thought) I used to love. I never realize until now that I am still in love him, now that he’s in front of me. Six months after we decided to take a break, nothing seem to change. Six months with only few words exchanged and everything still feel the same. Maybe love is like a herpes virus. It does not dies. It just rest, stays under your skin, until certain circumstances wake it up. And those eyes, those smiles, those kisses have woken it up.
Feel free to give your opinion. Thank you.
Comments (24)
Getting the reader to equate his/her experiences with those of your heroine, and so empathize with her...
See Snooks's comment above.
Biar lebih greget aja & makin penasaran orang bacanya.
Good luck ya mba with your new novel story
Nice pic. It'll look good with your bio.
Quadal, my bad, I am not native. Thank you for the critics, I'll try better.
Dear miclee, thank you for your comments and opinion, it really means a lot
Aduh sometimes my mind & my fingers misundertood with what i'm gonna write
iotaoo, been a while I don't write... time to start again. Thank you for stopping by and give comment.
I like the part in the next chapter where she realizes he is about to suggest another break, so she kills him so he can't leave and then she has to keep hiding the body in different places over the next ten years. Like Tonya Slaton and the murdered child she hid in her car for a decade.
And there's your title...
"WHERE'S WALDO?"
Haven't seen you around here for quite some time.
Like that time you fell asleep on the tanning bed...
And Wallops thought you looked like a monkey.
You were kinda cute in that pic...with the little bow in your hair.
Or what was left of it.
Hi Johny, I will post the next paragraph. I haven't written much though.
Hi Knenagh, best of luck with me, yes I need that. It still hurts, it's part of my way of letting go, I call it writing therapy :)