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A fake Jamaican took every last dime with a scam..

It was worth it just to learn some sleight-of-hand.
Bad news comes don't you worry even when it lands.
Good news will work its way to all them plans.
We both got fired on exactly the same day.
Well we'll float on good news is on the way.
(Yes it's a song, I have a spidey sense for scammers)

How much baggage are you carrying today?! No you’re over the fucking limit.
You are not boarding Hess’s flight to all knowingness. Yes I know everything.
You don’t know that I don’t. Don’t look at me like that.
Wanna fight?!
Go for it, I fight dirty. *Removes massive Gangsta hoops*, I know I can’t pull them off, but I live on Delusional Street. Rent prices are high here, we are an elitist bunch of so and so’s. We could buy but then that would be owning something. Owning something means that it’s invariably associated with you, your name is on it, it’s tied to you. Can ya tell me how to get, how to get to Delusional Street.

I surely can tell you. You take the first right off Assumption Avenue, then onto Lovers Lane, which leads you to Belligerence Boulevard, then you will see before you Delusional Street. Dang it, I missed the alliteration on the last one, but you found the place none the less.

I live here, not because of all the grandeur. We all know that delusion and grandeur are bedfellows never parted. I live here because safe to say, I’m happy here. I am an honest person, I am analytical, I am not super intelligent but I definitely have a different grasp on things, words mainly than most my age. Now this is primarily what has kept me in my fixed abode. The fact that I see the world through my own eyes. No-one has seen the things I’ve seen, from my perspective, angle. You see different things differently according to mood. I am so fucking idealistically special. That fucker in the sky, ya know….. Mmmm he puts us through trials and tribulations, watches on laughing, then gets fed up and decides the Ellen Show is better viewing. Leaves us to sort out his perceived pranks. What’s his name?! I think he goes by G-Almighty these days. Wants to pursue a rap career, appeal to todays youth.
Regardless of his name, he has not just bestowed this gift upon me. YOU are reading this right now. Through eyes, that give you the power to see. How amazing is the thing we most take for granted?! They say our feet are the most neglected part of our bodies. Well I conclude that we abuse our eyes everyday. We don’t allow them to give us the full pleasure of their purpose. This morning for example, I awoke with a dried sponge for a mouth due to Heineken consumption. Ohhh fuck, breaking news, Heineken and I are back together. Heino promised to go to hangover management classes and I think that’s a fair deal. Anyway, back to brillo pad tongue. I could see a glass of water on the night stand. It was clear. Wet, cold. Now you may say to me, that is how you know water to be. Before I ever hydrated my blessed mouth with the elixir of life, my eyes had drank it first. I knew how good it was going to feel before I even brought the glass to my lips. It’s small things like that, we miss out on.

Why do we see but blindly? We carry around a little suitcase in our heads. It’s full of stuff that you don’t really need to take on holiday, but ya do. Cause you never know, you might need it. Stuff like worries about the mortgage, whether you look fat in your current attire, insults an ex hurled at you.
Do you really need to take that around with you everyday? Tip it out. It really is quite simple. I had a big fuck off fucker of a suitcase. Well it was a trunk to be fair. One day, I said to myself… I don’t really need these things. It’s heavy, it makes my body weary, it weighs me down, its ridiculous effect draws my gaze away, from things I should be seeing.


(Continued in Comment, you know the drill)