On Judging and Being Judged

The blanket statement is that all people are judging and being judged everytime they encounter someone else.

The saying that "I don't judge" or "I Won't Judge You" is a lie whether you believe it or not.

When we encounter someone we assess them to determine if we want those people in our lives. For some people, that number turns out to be many, for others it is few.

Your judgements are based on how you perceive them. If you never judge anyone you would have everyone you meet fully in your lives. You would have no locks on anything, your home would be open to them anytime, even while you are sleeping. But that is not true, is it. Why?
Because you make judgements on everyone you meet. Not to, would be insane.

Understanding that you judge everyone you meet, it is important to realize that everyone you meet also judges you. They may judge you under different standards but they do judge you.

Judgements can be both positive and negative. I like this about this person but I don't like that. You make a judgement based on how you feel about that person. Sometimes without knowing all there is to know about them.

The people we surround ourselves with are usually people we have judged positively. There are different levels of positive judgement for different people. Those judgements are sometimes wrong. Experience and wisdom gained from interacting with different people cause us to make judgements based on traits we associate with positive or negative experiences.

If your past experiences with say, Indians or Muslims or Christians has resulted too many negative experiences we tend to group them in a poor judgement. At that point we tend to have a negative reaction to all traits demonstrated.

Sometimes that negative outlook for a type is warranted. The drug addict that steals from you to support their habit. You don't trust them with your stuff. You lock your doors and hide your belongings.
The compulsive liar is another. You do not believe them and suspect their every word.
On the other hand. We learn that some types are worthy of our trust. They hold their word and demonstrate their integrity with actions.

Personally, I don't mind being judged. I have integrity and I am trustworthy. I understand that others may judge me on other qualities as well. Sometimes I feel I get judged poorly by others because I failed to properly demonstrate the qualities they were looking for. I can accept that. I can only be me.

We also tend to make judgements on people we meet from other people's experiences. Our current society bombards us with criteria to use to make judgements. You may never have experienced domestic violence but someone that has a record of it will be judged by you based on someone else's experience. You don't invite a suspected murderer into your life do you (well, most of us don't).

You can never not be judged by others and you will always judge others. All you can do is be yourself and understand yourself.