Posted:Thu Oct 29, 2009 11:23 AM CST
SHORT MORNING PRAYERS OF “CS SPECIAL INDIVIDUAL"
Idling True Love Only Advertiser’s Prayer
Dear God, you know I’m searching for my true love. You only know how desperate I am and how hard I try on hourly basis to find my true love. Let my advertisement “only true love Please” grab the attention of many nice people. Don’t let anyone ridicule me for saying the same line over and over. Dear Lord, please don’t let scammers fool me with many virtual flowers today. Let my true love come to me like a breeze from Mountain Alps and embrace me. – Amen
Over Optimistic Blog Writer’s Prayer
Dear God, please encourage people to read my blogs from the first line to the last, before they fall asleep and start snoring. Enlighten them to understand what I try to tell, despite of my bombarding them with words which do not have much relevance to my topic. Let me have a clear understanding whether I help my friends by writing over optimistic articles or whether I confuse them by putting pressure on them to understand something even I do not understand. Lord, finally, let me have all favorable comments such as “nice writing, thanks for sharing with me” – Amen
Scammer’s Prayer
Dear God, please give me wisdom to understand why they call me a “scammer”. You know God, I’m just an innocent soul, who have got too much of influence of your Rival “devil”. Pleae give me courage to fight with him in my own way. You know God, I need money to fight your Enemy and please please help me in my quest today and grant me strength to fulfill the same for your glory and honour. Dear Lord, let me find more and more innocent profiles today, who are naïve enough to believe my story and kind enough to send some money to my bank account. Have mercy on me Lord, don’t let them publish my name on a blog or report me to the administrators – Amen
Extreme Emorticon User’s prayer
Dear God, thank you so very much for creating emorticons. You know without those small creatures, I would have been lost in a world of words. Lord, you can see from Heaven how happy I am when I keep on clicking those “teddy bears” and “beer mugs” and “thumbs ups” and “smiling hearts” to show my affection towards people I cant reach to see in person. From your divine wisdom, you observed that it’s not possible for this helpless soul to stretch the hands from Indian Ocean to Pacific Ocean or Pacific Ocean to Atlantic Ocean and created such a cute “teddy” to let people feel that I hug them, each time I click on the cute one. Dear Lord, encourage the usage of more and more emorticons and less words. - Amen
Balloon Expert’s Prayer
Dear God, I thank you today, for the interest you have inculcated in me, in balloons, a very special gift from you. I humbly praise you for the ability you have given me in spotting a balloon from far away and even in a teeny-weeny picture when its not least noticeable to the others. Lord, I feel truly blessed and I am so thankful to you for selecting me to be the one who enlightens people about such an interesting subject. Dear God, don’t ever let me disappoint you in fulfilling my duty towards you in assessing and analyzing balloons – Amen
Level headed English Professional’s Prayer
Dear God, let me use my wit efficiently and effectively today. Please do not let kindergarten children misunderstand my words and produce a new version of the comedy of errors, in my honour. Let me always be impartial in expressing my views and let me keep my cool even when I talk to an idiot. – Amen
P.S.
My prayer: Lord, let us all have peace. – Amen