Ok, you might not want to hear this but....
why waste time worrying/crying/losing sleep etc over someone who no longer loves you enough to be with you???

No matter what the obstacles, she put herself first!! Time for you to put yourself first and forget the clouds.
My marriage broke up after 23 years - I wept for less than a day in the end - what was the point (and yes, I was a loving wife etc etc etc, but I wisened up - quickly)

and me and my ex we are good pals still.