irishminx Forum Posts

This is a list of Forum Posts made by irishminx
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irishminx Forum Posts

Posted: Sep 1, 2008, 4:59 PM CST
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Posted: Jul 20, 2008, 6:31 AM CST
alabamabebe wrote:
OMFG! That may be the best one of the year!




Am thrilled you enjoyed it girl!

Great to laugh huh!



rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing


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Posted: Jul 20, 2008, 3:33 AM CST
You gotta love this..................rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing




> At the dole office in Castlebar a Traveller walked in to pick up his cheque.He marched straight up to the counter and said, ' How's it going
> Boss, You know, I just HATE drawing the dole. I'd like to get a
> job!'The social worker behind the counter said, ' Your timing is
> excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who
> wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter.You'll have to drive around in his 2008 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes.Because of the long hours, meals will be provided.You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips.This is rather awkward to say but you will also have, as part of your job assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive.
>
> A two-bedroom loft type apartment with plasma TV, stereo, bar, etc located above the garage, will be designated for your sole use and the salary is €200,000 a year.'The traveller just plain wide-eyed, said, '
> You're bull$h!ttin' me!
>
>
> 'The social welfare worker said, ' Yeah, well . . You started it!



rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing sticking out tongue sticking out tongue sticking out tongue rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing applause


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Posted: Jul 20, 2008, 3:30 AM CST

Subject: Fw: Paddy's fingers.....this is good, it might even be the best for 2008



Paddy was working at the fish plant in Cork when he accidentally cut off all 10 of his fingers.



He went to the emergency room in Cork 's hospital.
The doctor looked at Paddy and said, 'Lets be avin' da fingers and I'll see what oi can do'.
Paddy said, 'Oi haven't got da fingers.'
'Whadda ya mean you haven't got da fingers?
Lord Tunderin' Jesus, it's 2007!
We's got microsurgery and all kinds of incredible techniques. I could have put dem back on and made you like new!
Why didn't ya bring da fingers?!?'
And Paddy said, ' How da fock was I 'spose to pick dem up?'


Priceless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing


Bored so here's a few my Ex sent me: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 20, 2008, 12:42 AM CST
Tater wrote:
I have a shit load of them myself but they have pics and most have to be forwarded and I don't know how or if they can be sent to the forums it won't let me copy and paste.


I copied and pasted the jokes I've put up here from my thread on the Irish forum!

I enjoyed yours thanks!

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing thumbs up thumbs up


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Posted: Jul 20, 2008, 12:37 AM CST

Maid asks for a raise

A Mexican maid asked for a pay increase.
The wife was very upset about this and asked:
'Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase?'
Maria: 'Well, Señora, there are three reasons why I want an increase. The first is that I iron better than you.'
Wife: 'Who said you iron better than me?'
Maria: 'Your husband said so.' Wife: 'Oh.'
Maria: 'The second reason is that I am a better cook than you.' Wife: 'Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?' Maria: 'Your husband did.' Wife: 'Oh.'
Maria: 'My third reason is that I am a better lover than you.'
Wife (really furious now): 'Did my husband say that as well?' Maria: 'No Señora, the gardener did.'

SHE GOT THE RAISE


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Posted: Jul 20, 2008, 12:33 AM CST

A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.
'Mom', he asked, 'Are these my brains?'
'Not yet,' she replied.





What's the difference between a woman and a computer?

A computer can accept a three and a half inch floppy!!




I love sexist jokes!! rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing


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Posted: Jul 20, 2008, 12:31 AM CST


Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What's a mixed feeling?

A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q What's the height of conceit?

A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Q. What's the definition of macho?

A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?

A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?

A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q.Why is divorce so expensive?

A. Because it's worth it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What is a Yankee?

A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?

A. They both like a tight seal.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?

A. Their balls are just for decoration.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q.What is the difference between 'ooooooh'and 'aaaaaaah'?

A. About three inches.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?

A. The grip.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?

A. It's not hard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?

A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

A: 45 pounds.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?

A: 45 minutes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?

A: Breasts don't have eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?

A. The swallow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?

A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A . They don't have balls to scratch!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OH, don't groan. You know darn well you're going to send this on to somebody

Live well, laugh hard, & love deeply!!!




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Posted: Jul 20, 2008, 12:29 AM CST

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.
The barman looks at him and says, 'Hang on! You're a duck.'

'I see your eyes are working,' replies the duck.

'And you can talk!' exclaims the barman.

'I see your ears are working, too,' says the duck. 'Now if you don't
mind,can I have my beer and my sandwich please?'

'Certainly, sorry about that,' says the barman as he pulls the duck's pint.

'It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub. What are you doing round
this way?'

'I'm working on the building site across the road,' explains the duck. 'I'm
a dry-waller.'

The flabbergasted barman cannot believe the duck and wants to learn more,
but takes the hint when the duck pulls out a newspaper from his bag and
proceeds to read it.

So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the
barman good day and leaves.

The same thing happens for two weeks.

Then one day the circus comes to town.

The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to him
'You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be
just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches,
reads the newspaper and everything!'

'Sounds marvellous,' says the ringmaster, handing over his business card.

'Get him to give me a call.'

So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the barman says, 'Hey
Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good
money.'

'I'm always looking for the next job,' says the duck. 'Where is it?'

'At the circus,' says the barman.

'The circus?' repeats the duck.

'That's right,' replies the barman.

'The circus?' the duck asks again. 'That place with the big tent?'

'Yeah,' the barman replies.

'With all the animals who live in cages and performers who live in
caravans?' says the duck.

'Of course,' the barman replies.

'And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the
middle?' persists the duck.

'That's right!' says the barman.

The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says ...

'What the f*ck would they want with a drywaller??!'




Bored so here's a few my Ex sent me: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 19, 2008, 10:12 PM CST
MARTI wrote:
Aha...so from now on your nickname will be...........

Here He Here He.....

It issssssssss...

ELLEY SMELLEY..



rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing

Touche!


Hello everybody: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 19, 2008, 10:04 PM CST
Elley, I don't know you..........However, I'll put in my own two pence worth!

Hate destroys who you are!

Love brings you to who you are.

Maybe your challenge is to love yourself first?!?

Then you are in a place to love other's and life.

wave




Are you one of those people.....: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 19, 2008, 10:35 AM CST
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Posted: Jul 19, 2008, 4:56 AM CST
Thank you all, I really appreciate that you replied to me.

Minx

thumbs up wave


C.G. JUNG (1875 - 1961) QUOTES: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 9, 2008, 4:45 AM CST
I prefer a curcumcised Pen!s, it looks perfect that way!

dancing banana

thumbs up


CIRCUMCISION: How do you feel about it?: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 9, 2008, 4:37 AM CST
Knowing, accepting and loving who I am..................

yay


WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF?: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 9, 2008, 4:17 AM CST
They are one my favourite out door flowers..........

They are magnifcent

Thank you for showing them conrad

thumbs up


WHAT'S BLOOMING HERE (CONTAINS PICTURES): click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 4, 2008, 4:33 PM CST
smoky wrote:
I found one of his books at the Dump here ... and I treasure it. Its his life story. I always had just heard his name, thought he was Chinese, was surprised to find he was Swiss!!!!!


Can you give the name of his book please.

I love C.G. Jung philosophy as they are real and human.

Thank you,

Minx


C.G. JUNG (1875 - 1961) QUOTES: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 4, 2008, 4:25 PM CST
MARTI wrote:
but you're not we are here for you


Nina,

Go raibh mile maith agut.

It means, a million thanks.

Slainte, (health)

Minx wave


Lonely: click here to read the entire thread »

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Posted: Jul 4, 2008, 4:13 PM CST
Nina3 wrote:
What do you do when you are feeling lonely?


I'm not comfortable when I feel lonely, that is my raw truth! However, logically, I know it is a call to be with me. Every other way, I feel like sh*t after a shower!

So, I grin and bear it! Or come online!

uh oh!

Minx!


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Posted: Jun 22, 2008, 5:30 AM CST
Galwayman2008 wrote:
Here's a challenge. Describe yourself with a short funny poem. In Ireland we call them Limericks. The onle rules are that (a) the poem has five lines (b) the last word of lines one, two and five have to rhyme, (c) the last word of lines three and four also rhyme, and (d) you have to incorporate your CS name into the poem. Hope that all makes sense, here's my attempt:

There once was a man from Galway,

who prayed for a Gal -who-would-go-all-the- way.

Until the day his dreams - they came true,

and the Gal - oh yes the Gal she came too.

So now, be sure to say your prayers every day.




There once was a gal called the Minx,
whose hair, it was as wild as a Lynx.
Then one day she met her match
and he was (may I say) quite a catch
Cause he was as big, as that thing, called the Sphinx.


yay

Minx!


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