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I'd some for myself & the rest would go to my church & favorite charities.


If you knew....: click here to read the entire thread »

I can hardly see thru my tears to tell you Thank You so much for sharing this!!!




Some say American service people are murderers..: click here to read the entire thread »

ROFL choking


Nuts.: click here to read the entire thread »

I'll bring a few with me, (bought a couple 5 packs of smaller ones in wal-mart and a big super-soaker for me) but.... you can be sure I'll keep the biggest one for me!!

also got some water balloons...bombs away!!!!!


CS Get-together Picnic, Norris Dam Park, Knoxville, TN, Saturday, August 16th: click here to read the entire thread »

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, 'Why is the bride dressed in white?'
The mother replied, 'Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.'
The child thought about this for a moment then said, 'So why is the groom wearing black?'
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A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed, 'Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let me be late!'
While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She got up, brushed herself off, and started running again!
As she ran she once again began to pray, 'Dear Lord, please don't let me be late...But please don't shove me either!'
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Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers.
The first boy says, 'My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.'
The second boy says, 'That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100.'
The third boy says, 'I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!'
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An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers.
In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, 'They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead.'
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A police recruit was asked during the exam, 'What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?'
He answered, 'Call for backup.'
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A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem.
A small child replied, 'They couldn't get a baby-sitter.'
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A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to 'Honor thy father and thy mother,' she asked, 'Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?'
Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'
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At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings.
Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and she said, 'Johnny, what is the matter?'
Little Johnny responded, 'I have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife.'
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Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong preaching on the devil.
One said to the other, 'What do you think about all this Satan stuff?'
The other boy replied, 'Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It's probably just your Dad.'
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You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing! Take heed and pass these along to people who need a laugh.


Jokes that can be told in church: click here to read the entire thread »

Funny Cartoons (several pics): click here to read the entire thread »

What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others."

Even if you've seen these before, they are still hilarious!!!
What DO they teach in journalism courses these days?
THE YEAR'S BEST (actual!) HEADLINES

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No, really?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far!
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Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
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Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Those good-for-nothing lazy so-and-sos!
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Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
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War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
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If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya' think?!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Enfield Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren't they fat enough?!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That's what he gets for eating those beans!
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Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
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Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chain-saw Massacre all over again!
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Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
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And the winner is....
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Did I read that right?


The Year's Best Headlines: click here to read the entire thread »

The Last Person To Post Here Is A Superstar.....Part 3.: click here to read the entire thread »

Hi there!!


Yo, what it is?...: click here to read the entire thread »

One day, while going to the store, I passed by a nursing home.

On the front lawn were six old ladies lying naked on the grass.

I thought this was a bit unusual, but continued on my way to the store.

On my return trip, I passed the same nursing home with the same six old ladies
lying naked on the lawn.

This time my curiosity got the best of me, & I went inside to talk to the
Nursing Home Administrator. 'Do you know there are six ladies lying naked on your Front lawn?'

'Yes,' she said. 'They're retired prostitutes, - they're having a yard sale.'


RETIREMENT IS DIFFERENT FOR EVERYONE!: click here to read the entire thread »

NOT FOR SALE!!!!!


Are you ready???: click here to read the entire thread »

The Last Person To Post Here Is A Superstar.....Part 3.: click here to read the entire thread »

Been there, & finished that!!!! Watch out for the mood swings!!! I got fired from a job because of them!!! And OMG!!!! those hot flashes!!!! Just out of curiosity, when I felt a flash coming on I took my temperture & it shot up to 102!!!! Have the night sweats started yet???? I never took anything for the change & I do not take any HRT's now. I did try some over the counter supplements, but they didn't seem to help any so I stopped taking them.

Best advice I can give is see your doctor. Every woman is different.





going through......................: click here to read the entire thread »

My son just got home from work and said a few trees were knocked over and one hawk escaped when a tree fell on the display & broke a hole in the fence. No animals were hurt or killed though. One of the female chimps was pregnant and the stress of the storm caused her to go into labor a little early. Mom & baby are just fine!!!


Wow!! What a storm!!!!: click here to read the entire thread »

There was a rabbi whose wife was expecting a baby so he went before the congregation and asked for a raise.

After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the rabbi's
family expanded, so would his paycheck.

After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the congregation
decided to hold another meeting to discuss the rabbi's salary. There was much yelling and bickering about how much his additional children were costing the synagogue.

Finally, the Rabbi got up and spoke to the crowd, "Children are a gift from God," he said. Silence fell on the congregation.

In the back pew, a little old lady stood up and in her frail voice said, "Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers."


CHILDREN ARE A GIFT FROM GOD: click here to read the entire thread »

Now Available at Boob, Butt and Beyond!


Finally, an orthopedic bed for men!!!: click here to read the entire thread »

So sorry you can't make this time. I will be keeping Renee & you in my thoughts & prayers.




CS Get-together Picnic, Norris Dam Park, Knoxville, TN, Saturday, August 16th: click here to read the entire thread »

We had quite a storm here yesterday!!! The power was knocked out about 5:30 pm and didn't come back on on until after midnight. We had no tv, cable or internet. I was going crazy without my computer!!! lol. In our next door neighbor's yard a 40 to 50 foot pine tree was knocked down by the wind!!! Luckily the tree didn't fall on the house or cars, or on our property. We didn't suffer too much damage, just a few big branches were knocked down, mostly in our driveway, (it's a long driveway, about 75 yards long). There was a lot of damage of trees & power lines knocked down all over the Knoxville area, but so far on the news there have been no deaths, Thank God!! They said on the news this has been on of the worst storms in this area in a very long time, I'm just thankful we are all ok.

Well that's about it for now, I'm getting ready to go help my brother clean up the yard & driveway. My son has his work cut out for him at the zoo today, I just hope none of the animals were hurt or killed. I'm sure I'll get a full report from him when he gets home this afternoon.



Wow!! What a storm!!!!: click here to read the entire thread »

or are you getting nowhere??


How come.......: click here to read the entire thread »

bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla




As another Obama for President thread bites the dust...: click here to read the entire thread »