As we age into our forties, I like many of us, have lost contact with all but a few college friends.
Those that you do keep in touch and keep in your heart are very special friends.
You do know their dirt from a long time ago, and you forgive or forgot most of it.
I have this friend, Scott, pure of heart, give you the shirt off his back, raising his 8 year old daughter while his wife takes
an extended separation. They live apart yet function as one in parenting and supporting their daughter.
He has a few quirks as we all do, and one of them is his over friendliness. Scott has never met a stranger and he will
talk to anybody who will listen, for an extended period of time. Your input to his discussion is optional.
All his friends love Scott, and know well of his verbose ramblings.
To be Scott's friend, you must be patient and keep him on track.
Scott has never been on time for anything in his life.
Recently, another old friend, Donna, invited me to come visit her family. I have not seen Donna & Bob's kids since they were little, and their daughter is in college. They married their last year of college, while she was pregnant with the daughter. Donna had been a party girl, but she found Bob, and they now celebrate +20 years of marriage.
Upon her invitation, Donna suggested, that I bring Scott. She suggested, kidding of course,
that I should take the precaution of tying him up and under no circumstances allow him 'just one second' to talk to anybody. The drive would be a short five hours or less instead of a predictable 7 if left to Scott.
Donna has a very dry wit.
Here's my mistake. When I suggested to Scott we accept the invitation, I included the suggestion. Big mistake.
I meant is as a joke to needle my friend on his endless quest to speak with every soul in Texas.
He did not see the humor. He knows he has a problem with being on time but is touchy about it.
Scott leaped off into a rant about how responsible he was back then and how they were the ones having premarital sex,
and they never come to visit him and ,,, the oxygen level was getting dangerously low in the room,
so I switched topics to save us from asphyxiation.
Now I do love all in this story, and I never resort to violence. Yet the longer I let it linger,
the more attractive it is too simply walk up and punch Scott in the nose,
and then explain how seriously angry I am at his rant.
Hells bells! Their marriage may have had a rocky start, but Donna & Bob's marriage is 3 times what Scott's or mine are!
I am in the middle of a vicious 3 year divorce and Scott has been separated 2 years.
We both have kids in the middle of our quagmire of marriages.
How dare he say anything negative about that beautiful college freshman or her parents!
Scott thinks he is Donna's adopted big brother.
(They are not related, just from the same neighborhood as children).
And yes Donna slept with a few guys in a small triangle of houses, a long time ago.
Not me, (I slept with Donna's friends ), not Scott and Bob was the last!
Bob won the prize and had the cajones to take responsibility for it.
While every one else was jumping off into bachelorhood and their first apartment and first job,
Bob & Donna were changing diapers!
Donna and I know each other's dirty secrets and have stayed friends many years.
I am even closer to Bob, through end of college vacations we took together.
We followed The Killers Bees tour to Galveston! What happens in college stays in college!
Yes, yes, I know violence is never the answer.
If I try to broach the subject, Scott will out talk me hands down. He wins every argument through attrition.
He takes no prisoners. So I will not try to talk to him about it, nor will I tell our friends.
I see "Scott" every other day and avoid the subject.
But I still want to punch my friend in the nose and tell him why!
Any suggestions?
What happens in college, stays in college. Mostly. : click here to read the entire thread »