The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast
infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in
the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly
greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay
their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack,
the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies,
and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with
flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly
described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was
kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his
later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered
a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked
schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was
a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model
for millions. Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough,
three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus
they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly
father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20
minutes.
If this made you smile for even a brief second,
please rise to the occasion and take time to pass it on and
share that smile with someone else who may be having a
crumby day and kneads a lift
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