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From a bird to an almighty being to a god and now an eater of royalty. What a strange and rather disturbing epic journey you've been on, my friend. I wonder what's in store for you next.


What does this scripture passage mean to you??: click here to read the entire thread »

Good point, Lushy.


If a man ask you to do something in bed and you refuse, but he keeps asking, do you: click here to read the entire thread »

I'll admit it....I'm scared: click here to read the entire thread »

Exactly. Romantic relationships aren't principally altruistic in nature (nor would we want them to be...who would want to be loved as a charity case?), and it's a simple fact that some quid pro quo is involved. To think otherwise is to indulge in pure - albeit nice-sounding - fantasy.


I'll admit it....I'm scared: click here to read the entire thread »

It's not subjugation to have some expectations of your partner. And it's not all about being Mother Teresa for them, either. Both partners in a romantic relationship ought to be willing to do things for each other. If one isn't willing or able to achieve some rough parity in those terms, then problems will ineluctably follow.




I'll admit it....I'm scared: click here to read the entire thread »

I know, Dawn - that was my first response...which led to my perhaps ill-advised parody...


if he beat you while you were pregnant ?: click here to read the entire thread »

I'll admit it....I'm scared: click here to read the entire thread »

I think that's an excellent attitude, Dana.


If a man ask you to do something in bed and you refuse, but he keeps asking, do you: click here to read the entire thread »

Well, I see two questions here. First, his respecting your refusal - that goes without saying. I can see asking more than once, but at some point it becomes simple harassment. If he doesn't stop asking at that point, then you probably should accept that he won't stop asking, and that the only way you'll stop the harassment is by breaking up with him.

The second question is more complex: How much should one be willing to do to please one's partner sexually? I think a rule of thumb - assuming you are strongly connected with this person - is one whole helluva lot. I think you should be open insofar as humanly possible - perhaps even a notch beyond - to your partner's desires/requests. Doing something that may not be your favorite thing to please your lover does not seem unreasonable. But of course one must draw the line somewhere. I would suggest being very careful to be as generous with that line as you can be.


If a man ask you to do something in bed and you refuse, but he keeps asking, do you: click here to read the entire thread »

Yeah, Jampie, that was one of my very dark jokes...they can be rather dangerous, I've found, but sometimes irresistible. I mean, really, is the OP's question even a question? If you have to ask if it's okay to be beaten when you're pregnant... It's like asking if it's okay to shoot someone if they're wearing a plaid shirt or something (well, okay, maybe in that case).

Yes, seriously, I'm very familiar with the two-character situation. Often an abuser will be charming as all hell in the beginning, and then just plain hell later. But far more insidious and problematic is the abuser who actually has a charming, decent side, which can manifest alternately or even simultaneously with mean, abusive behavior. The partner is being pulled and pushed every which way but sane by that kind of behavior.

Sorry about my uber-droll humor, A.




if he beat you while you were pregnant ?: click here to read the entire thread »

I suppose that depends on the sex of your baby (a male fetus might be more receptive to tough love, whereas a female fetus would likely be more sensitive).


if he beat you while you were pregnant ?: click here to read the entire thread »

I'd sure hate to be on your bad side, E. Your abs alone should be registered as deadly weapons!


if he beat you while you were pregnant ?: click here to read the entire thread »

I'm searching for my candles as we speak, Trish (another reason to have a fireplace in one's house! My cousin was without power for two weeks in an isolated area in the dead of winter, and kept warm with her firestove, and cooked with it as well).

Another example of a sudden loss of technology in bad weather occurs when your car breaks down in the dead of winter out here. You should have extra warm clothing, sleeping bag, food, water, and candles are helpful..


what an odd experience......... power outage in my community: click here to read the entire thread »

Just wanted to say, HL, I've been watching the documentary, and agree with your very well-written review of it. I've read and seen the same things you have (there are nearly infinite documentaries/books on the Third Reich), and this is my fave thus far! Thanks again!


Historical Movie... Documentary: click here to read the entire thread »

But of course, in your account, God created mankind...


Historical Movie... Documentary: click here to read the entire thread »

That's probably best for the most part...


Wisconsin Cold: click here to read the entire thread »

Hey, T!!!! Nice to see you make an appearance, lovely lady!


Wisconsin Cold: click here to read the entire thread »

We've got you beat by a country mile, Wisc. We've been running -10F plus windchill for days and days...along with enough snow to stall 4-wheel drive pickups on the local roads (had to drag my son's butt out yesterday!).




Wisconsin Cold: click here to read the entire thread »

Well, that wasn't quite my thought-experiment question, JB. If someone gave you that kind of ultimatum, then of course you - and probably any sane person! - would say no.

Rather, what I intended to ask in my scenario was: If you knew that you had to make a choice between a having a serious relationship (let's say a lifelong relationship with a soul-type mate) OR maintaining a busy social life, which would you choose?
To be clear, no one's asking you to do this. You just know this choice exists as a fact of life (and no, I'm not arguing that this would really be the case - it's only a thought-experiment designed to unearth your true feelings).

You've got to make the choice right now - no ifs ands or buts. Which would you choose??




PERIL... enter at your own risk!: click here to read the entire thread »

Right, JB, as someone who prefers more intimate get-togethers to parties and activities with large groups, I probably am viewing your situation from a somewhat biased vantage point. Of course there are guys who enjoy socializing (most far more than I!), so I doubt that would be a problem.

It's pretty obvious, though, that your present routine doesn't work well for meeting serious guys. Possibly part of the problem is where and how you play isn't ideal for meeting such men. I'm not sure what activities are available there, but perhaps some activities might be more amenable to meeting relationship-guys than, say, attending bars/restaurants... How about book-reading night at the local library? I'm only half-kidding. In the past, I found the least likely place to find a suitable lady was at a bar/nightclub...but then that's doubtless due in part to my tastes in women.

I think being "smoke-free" and in good physical shape significantly enlarges the pool of possible suitors, but I suspect that's only a small percentage of the problem here.

Interesting thought-experiment - thought-experiment only! - if you had to choose between a busy/fulfilling social life and a serious relationship, which would you choose, Jacquie? An easy way to clearly view your true priorities, I'm thinking....




PERIL... enter at your own risk!: click here to read the entire thread »