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If I'm still around when she gets past her present situation then good, if not then that will be good to. She's fine and will be o.k. I do however, think it would be a terrible if we do not remain friends. I really like her as a person and totally enjoyed just being out with her...maybe even more than the sex!... Hell, everything was fine up until that point.....


Understanding women...sex but end of relationship....: click here to read the entire thread »

Weird that you should put it that way. General accepted behavior dictates that if you don't like where you live or your neighbors then you pick up and move. Nowadays, rather than do that there are many who insist on forcing others to tolerate their errant behavior which does not fit into the norms of the community. As for the family thing...hmmm... you choose to go to the functions and you have to be willing to accept everyone and their conversation and actions when there. If you know what's acceptable then why cause problems by bring along your homosexual lover and spoiling the party for everyone else? You don't go to a Halloween party with 4th of july fireworks do you? Well, if it's a Halloween party then maybe you do....???


Some therapists say homosexuality is a treatable disease. : click here to read the entire thread »

No doubt Jodi... you've lived the life and know it's true meaning and value. KUDOS to you!

So many people take so much for granted and demand they have everything handed to them and to be catered to. You, my dear, are what life's all about... you found yourself and flourished from the things you were denied. Tho' I feel that I was blessed as a child I still sometimes feel that I had the same struggles that you had.... just because you have a family and a home does not mean that life is or has been easy. Money and material things don't mean shit when it comes to being happy.


Who did you grow up with: click here to read the entire thread »

I'd rather not flirt with a married woman and would rather she not flirt with me. If she's in a committed relationship then she should stay committed or get out of it. If she's on the fence then I'd have to think seriously about it and have a serious conversation before proceeding. As for how I have conversations with them it strictly depends on the subject of the conversation and it's intent.


Does a person martial or relationship staus effect you: click here to read the entire thread »

I'd say that if you're not going through with it then you shouldn't flirt and be misleading...presenting temptations.

As for people lying on their profile, saying they're single when they're actually married...well, uh...what's the punishment for misleading advertising? I think it should be a felony and punishable by 100 lashes and a few years in the clink.


Is married people who say they are single on these sites ,should be listed as scammers!!!: click here to read the entire thread »

I doubt seriously that many who choose to be gay do so with the full knowledge of what they will be facing in the future. They don't really think about the repercussions. Kinda like....how many people knowingly commit crimes knowing they're going to get caught and are willing to pay the price? VIRTUALLY ZERO! They're all trying to get away with it and do not want to accept the responsibility...rarely do people commit crimes knowing they will get caught and gladly accept the punishment. Gay people do not want to accept the stigma or the bashing that society puts on them. They do what they want rather than conform to the standards of "normal" society. Irresponsible? Depends on how you look at it. Whichever way, it's a choice whether we go with our impulses or acceptable behavior... as I recall, that is considered to be self-discipline which can open up a whole 'nuther can of worms here. If it were not for self-discipline I'd be rubbing every fine looking woman on the ass then bitching because people didn't accept my behavior as acceptable and approve of it...so, why is rubbing a woman on the ass not a socially acceptable way of saying "hey, I want to get to know you?"... ya mean to tell me that if I do whatever I want to do that it's not okay? regardless of how I was born or what my desires and impulses are? Man, this whole thing can get really deep with issues that only circumvent deviant behavior.


Some therapists say homosexuality is a treatable disease. : click here to read the entire thread »

As I laid it out in my lengthy post...some are born gay... but a very large number are simply lost people searching for an identity and acceptance. Lots of people simply thrive on being different whether bashed or not, unacceptable or not. There are huge numbers of people who live to do nothing more than fight for a cause de celebre... some people thrive on chaos and drama. There is definitely no "one answer fits all"... its just a boiling pot of the zillions of choices and opinions we make and some we can or can not control. Some people feel just as comfortable with a male as with a female simply because they want the human connection and the emotion whether they are sexually involved or not. There are guys that I can say I love although I'm not homosexual and have no kind of sexual relations with them whatsoever...


Some therapists say homosexuality is a treatable disease. : click here to read the entire thread »

As for it being a treatable disease... well, if you believe in hypnosis then you can get great results from a therapist. If you do not want change then you will not change. It is a choice and unless you can see where it is more desirable or beneficial to make that change then it is highly unlikely that you will. No magic pill to cure any of the social ills. As long as it is considered socially acceptable behavior it will continue and proliferate where it is acceptable... you could even compare it to the huge increase in interracial dating since the 1960's....wow... we don't even want to go there in this thread.


Some therapists say homosexuality is a treatable disease. : click here to read the entire thread »

It is far too complicated of an issue to be a simply yes/no answer. There are many many people who fall into the homosexual lifestyle from exposure and the fact that it has been presented to them not only as acceptable behavior but also as desirable behavior and some even have been persuaded to feel guilty if they do not participate in homosexual activity. I've seen this among young guys I knew growing up. I think people simply search for an identity and if they don't have successful heterosexual relationships then they are vulnerable to fill the sexuality in their lives whether it be with the same sex or even an animal. It is deviant behavior simply because it deviates from the natural design of the human body. Sure, some are born with their wires crossed and are fully and naturally homosexual and do not have a choice, never did. But, there are others who simply found social acceptance and identity by being included or invited or even persuaded into the culture. Personally, I am seriously offended by being called a homophobe...that indicates that I'm afraid of homosexuals...not at all the case. I treat them as fair and honestly as anyone but I do not accept that culture as being something I want to be associated with. It is a matter of choice as well as strength of personal convictions. Right or wrong, if it's what a person wants then I'm not going to be able to stop him/her or to change their mind. Many justify their choices with trite expressions such as "I was trapped in the wrong body"... however, there are some who actually were and we simply can not perform a test to see if they are right or wrong...too, there is certainly a sliding scale as to one's inclination to be bi- or homo-sexual or heterosexual the same as there is a sliding scale of skin tones from lily white to coal black. We're all still humans and tend to group ourselves according to our interests, similarities, and desires....as well as where we are accepted and where we fit in socially. I think the current method of popularizing "gayness" is very wrong because it pushes people to accept gayness by encouraging them to feel guilty if they do not accept or participate in homosexual behavior. If I happen not to be politically correct then I guess I'm just an old fart stuck in the 1950's ...but I totally expect anyone who wants respect from me to give me respect as well and respect my right to have the opinion(s) that I do....which by the way..is just that. It's only an opinion.


Some therapists say homosexuality is a treatable disease. : click here to read the entire thread »

limit = infinity


What is the limit of the Mind ?: click here to read the entire thread »

Both bio-parents. I was in total shock when my 1st wife divorced me. I couldn't accept that. It simply was not supposed to be that way. All I ever knew was one mom, one dad. That's the only world I knew...total trust and unquestioned commitment...never a worry about coming home and no one there. The life I've lived is nothing at all like the loving family I grew up in. It was an idealistic life compared to todays accepted life styles.


Who did you grow up with: click here to read the entire thread »

Definitely...being an enabler is the worst downfall of many parents. Getting out of the habit and preventing others from becoming the enabler is very difficult if not impossible. There are many people whose lifestyle is to live off of enablers and they never learn any other way.


What is the RIGHT thing to do?: click here to read the entire thread »

When I was younger and rather innocent I placed a totally different value on sex. Nowadays its more like just part of getting to know a lady. It's hardly a sign of commitment. I may have grown to really like or even love a woman but once in bed I may totally fall in love with her or may find that I don't like her so well physically and it ruins what we had emotionally. For me...I want the whole package and will not settle for a bad relationship just to be with a woman that I'm totally thrilled with in bed. I may even, and have had a relationship in which I totally enjoyed being with her but the sex was bad enough to run me off. At my age I do have and anticipate that any woman I meet will have baggage. We will never be able to give 100% of ourselves and must accept that baggage...we've lived a lot of life and we take those experiences into the relationship with us. There is no way to avoid that. We are constantly healing and once we are over the shock of separation and the anxiety of it then we just move on. We simply have no choice but to live with the memories of the past... good or bad. So, yeah, I'm definitely ready to find a good decent woman such as the one I started writing this thread about but I'm definitely not locked on to her. There are many good women out there. So, I'm not worried about finding one. Only problem I have is that I'm rather isolated where I live so am relying heavily on the internet to meet women. However, I may meet one about anywhere I happen to go. From time to time I'm in large building supply stores and Walmart...so those provide lots of opportunity although not much social atmosphere.


Understanding women...sex but end of relationship....: click here to read the entire thread »

I just don't do the F!@# buddy bit. To me that's like being dirt under some woman's feet. If she doesn't respect me then I might as well just give her my billfold and buy her groceries. I definitely see the great value in being a one woman man for a one man woman.


Understanding women...sex but end of relationship....: click here to read the entire thread »

It's not the one's who've been locked up that I worry about...it's the one's who have not been caught!


Background Checks: click here to read the entire thread »

Dude... been there and done that too! It put me in a hell of a twisted emotional state...major depression, etc. because it came at the end of a very long relationship. She wanted her cake and to eat it too. I know it will damn near kill you to do it...but cut her off TOTALLY...turn your back on her and get the hell out before she gives you a heart attack or stroke...unless you just like being used and trampled on. RUN LIKE HELL! She's got your heart and is going to rip it to little biddy pieces... GTFO!....Hard as it is to accept there are plenty more out there and you can find at least one that is mature and honest.


Understanding women...sex but end of relationship....: click here to read the entire thread »

yeah...the only real complicating factor is that she had been dating a guy that she still has feelings for and has good reason(s) not to trust him. Too, she is having guilt feelings because she considers it "casual" sex...which I do not. Well, for sure, she had a hell of a good time while she was having it! So, it's an experience she can remember ...and hopefully with a smile on her face! I just hate that now she's dealing with guilt and second thoughts. So, now I'm anticipating that this guy is going to show up soon and she's not going to feel comfortable with him because of it...and that's fine with me because he has not held up his end of their relationship (IMHO). I have absolutely no regrets.
Hell, I was thrilled that I was able to stay fully clothed and worked her so much that she was the octopus that was all over me!.... damn she was an animal!...and a very happy one! Honestly, the foreplay made me quite proud of my accomplishment! I do believe tho' that if we had put it off for a couple more dates that she would still be around and the relationship would have deepened and moved forward. I am very proud of and happy with the way she has handled it. She does have a very mature and honest way to deal with me which is totally unlike the woman who left me back in August after nearly 5 years...just cold turkey walked off and doesn't even accept my calls...and all with absolutely no reason...still hurting over that one and will for a very long time....but hey... I'm moved on! Que Sera, Sera....


Understanding women...sex but end of relationship....: click here to read the entire thread »

ugh... reminds me of those stupid potato chip commercials "betcha can't eat just one"... give me a good taste then snatching the whole bag of potato chips away from me and leaves me craving more... hmmm...surely I'll find more potato chips.


Understanding women...sex but end of relationship....: click here to read the entire thread »

Thanks fireliter... I'm just very thankful that I was able to talk her into remaining friends and convincing her that I in no way am a threat to her sanity or anything else. So far we still email each other nice stuff and have talked a couple of times on the phone and she's good enough that she has done at least 1/2 of the calling...a sign of a real friend!
But still, she insists on not dating at this time. For sure, I do feel that the door is not locked and I am definitely a patient person so...unless there is another little fishy swims by and can overcome my desire for her then I might just move on down the road.... but....man I really hate it tho' ...we just had so much in common and were so overly comfortable together that it kinda spooked her. Whatever happens I will definitely respect her wishes...and maybe, just maybe, she will read this thread.


Understanding women...sex but end of relationship....: click here to read the entire thread »

I have to agree with you B.E.B. It was absolutely a performance of a lifetime! I mean...like total restraint until she was boiling over! LITERALLY!... I do know for a fact that she has issues she is dealing with...kinda sorta my heart goes out to her and all of us who are dealing with lost loves and have issues that we are not through dealing with. There will always be something in the back of my mind that refuses to let me give 100% of myself to a woman and I have to deal with that every time I'm alone with a woman.


Understanding women...sex but end of relationship....: click here to read the entire thread »