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lusciousmile: Have you ever faced this, with friends, colleagues, school mates, loved ones?

I have felt this.

You share a secret, or sentiment with someone, someone who encourages it and continuously says you are doing nothing wrong. Someone else finds out, you get the fall, alone. Suddenly it's a bad thing you have been doing. Ever heard of three sides of a story? Well that's the case.

Accusations, innuendos through friends, collegues or family, any attempt to make you out to be a villain. Remember this, whatever you did, you did in confidence, and didn't mean to hurt anyone. Kinda like your slip showing.

I have been feeling this for a while now, and the person who accused me of this, has said nothing, NOTHING at all, while i keep getting blame for God knows what. The person who betrayed me, has the audacity to 'explain' things to his friends, remember, suddenly they can't say a word to me and i get the blame. I feel like i just cheated with a married man, yet i haven't. Explaining yourself doesn't help, because the person who has been 'hurt' says it's over, tells you to let it go, but clearly they haven't.

Here's the funny thing, before the accusations, you get so uneasy, you decide to stop communication.

Now, everyone else gets comforted and you get nothing but blame. Tell me, should i who was told i did nothing wrong (which i didn't) be the one to blame for this hurt?

My question is, how would YOU resolve this?

I want honest answers, because i have tried to work it out myself but can't, why, because i need answers i am not getting.No forum kamikaze her, just ideas to solve this. I have never in my year here, felt such confusion, yet i have dated a man, not a man i exchanged an email with, but a man i deeply cared for, respected and spent my time with. Now this, because of a man i never even thought i would ever meet.1. I'm confused, if i wasn't doing something wrong ( which i think is true), then should i feel my confidence was betrayed? Help me out here.
2, If i was doing something wrong all the while, why didn't this person who seemed to respect me, not let me know or try to correct me themselves? Why did i have to hear from a third party that i did something wrong? Why did this person never even try to stop communication with me (the wrong doer) before i did?

Opinions?

BarrenPneuma: I do understand the one-sided thing but I believe it is in our perceptions that we allow this to exist. Love does not expect reciprocation and if it is meant to be nothing will stop it. Likewise if it is not meant to be nothing will make it happen.
I understand that my discernment of this is not a common one nor do I expect any one else to see as I do. For some the best option is to move on to seek their heart's joy wherever it might be and to them I send my best wishes. Everyone deserves the utmost in happiness and fulfillment. In her I have found more than I have ever had and that sates any possibility for whatever my heart ever dreamed. That is enough for me. Do I want more? Of course I want it all but never without it being given wholly. I could never force, beguile, or otherwise stip a single part of her freedom for any desire no matter how much I could ever want. My Love is uncondtional and not revokeable in any way shape or form without destroying what it is completely.

BarrenPneuma: She is still in my life Daniel in every way I could ever want. Just not here. I have lost nothing and gained everything with and through her. I gave her my heart completely and it is safe in her hands no matter what the future holds. How could I be true to myself and to the omnipotence of Love if I could ever take what I gave her to seek to trade it to another to whom I could never feel fairly what they deserve? Every woman will always be a pale shadow of her in my heart and I could never stoop so low as to imagine that treating any of the beautiful ladies here in such a way would be appropriate in any way. I am content to remain alone without her in that way as log as I never lose our friendship which alone is a treasure worth everything.

BarrenPneuma: I do not seek to experience multitudes of communion with those lovely angels of the opposite gender. I have never sought solace in such and never in truth could. I have been involved with my own share of women, gaining and losing as the situation played out. Those times are in my past and better suited to a youthful man. I am by no means old but i am far to sensitive to seek anything less than all I desire.
My heart is a very specific voice that guides me unerringly to what it is that creates opportunity for this fulfillment and I choose no other, ever. I do not understand how through my words this cannot be understood, or worse if the words of my heart were recognized in the exact proportion to which they were spoken how anyone would ever imagine it a worthy cause to become entangled in my life in such a negative way.
I have not approached any but one woman in all the time I have been on this site. I have never been on another site of any sort, until I left this one so shamefully. And there I never once accepted any offer of more than friendship. My heart is completely drawn to one shining star in the heavens and no matter what is to ever come of this I will not seek again. For me I believe that my heart has clearly defined with no room for doubt exactly what it is that I seek, and there is no possibility that I will change even the slightest perception of this. I know what I have seen and it is more than anything I could have imagined. My heart and soul will to this woman always belong. A cheque written to encompass all that I am or ever will be. Whether she cashes it or not is no part of any equation I contemplate. I expect nothing from her but what she gives of her own heart and that is to me more than I could have asked anyway.
The future is never certain but I can guarantee that for her I will always be there in whatever way she accepts.
The testament to my heart's desire is that as close as we are, and how hard it was to lose her for a time in my life, she is back of her own accord and that is all I ever wanted. My best friend forever.

RillyNiceGuy: how about one with one patting another one on the butt!

RillyNiceGuy: Granpa said to stay drunk!

X_REBEL: Well you just might be running the biggest scam around here...lol
I won't know who is really sitting behind the pc...you could also be a 80year old man having a fetish for handsome/sexy men in their thirties...

gypsykisses: I needed to throw a lie in there somewhere...

tgwstw: 10 bottles of Heineken, some Bacardi on an empty stomach has morphed me into a hideous creature.
I am like Golum, only 120lbs fatter. My poor ole bloated belly makes me look 11 months pregnant, that or I ate some village children on my stumble home.
I feel like a dried out brillo pad.
Kool Aid and two nurofens later, I still feel hideous.

I even planned to not drink that much, but my battered wife of a liver seemed to just suck it all up.

I realize this is all self inflicted. In my defense I had a good time, an innocent one. I didn't make out with any random people nor did I try to pass on my drunken wisdom. We all chatted and sipped away, talking about the wrongness of some porn and also played a game where by we had to name celebrities beginning with certain letters. I got stuck on Z and had to neck double bacardis.

I should be the poster child of anti binge drinking.

Someone help me, please!!!

Hypno_cat: Pictures of what? Dogs? Horses? Houses? Cabbages?

gypsykisses: Why would I lie? No one really reads the profiles anyway...

I can understand why she did it-it dropped her down in the "looking for" age category.

It cuts off at 45--which to us amazing looking women, is quite unfair.

At least she admitted it in her profile.

It wasn't necessary though. Men who have cut off points of 45 still hound me.

I've seen some rather worn men who claim they are 50 when they look older by about 10 or 100 years...

vampires

BnaturAl: I told you to get rid of the mirror ... it is not a self esteem builder

brokenspirit: Daniel, Thank you, religion has been such a touchy subject and this post is letting those who wish to speak of their beliefs without ( hopefully) being ridiculed. As for me, I am a Christian. But I do not try to choke people with my beliefs. I also am looked down upon by several in the church I USED to worship in. I now worship in my home each day . Will not go into what drove me away from that church. But will say, even though I am a Christian, I am not perfect and never will be and I don't feel that I or my beliefs are any better than others. JMO

adamisk: cerebral fluid .

micheldeprince: my dear big D.....
my pray and wishes
prince