laffingone Forum Posts

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laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
oranges2apples: well i'm 42 and can'nt even get the escort service to return my calls. whats up ? seriously i don't find too many women looking for the 40's man.


There are some of us out there that are looking for men in the 40 age range. However if you are looking for girls in their 20's they may not be.


Men my age suck!: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
Well I wish I could vote for 2 of the choices, I believe it is a cry for help but also if someone is teminally ill and in unbearable pain pain I think they should have the right to commit suicide.


SUICIDE - which choice most accurately reflects your opinion?: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
Why? Because I said sotongue

rotate your right foot clockwise, now while you are doing this write the number 6 with your right index finger. See what happens.

lips


Try This: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
1. You cannot touch all of your top teeth with your tongue.








2. All idiots, while reading the First Truth, will try it.






3. And they will discover that the First Truth is a lie.






4. You're smiling now because you're one of those idiots.







5. You soon will forward this to another idiot.







6. And there will still be a stupid smile on your face while you're doing it.



I do not apologize about this and I do not feel sorry about sending it to you.
I'm an idiot too and I just needed company!!


Six Truths of Life: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them are hurt. God works in mysterious ways.
After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers.The woman says, 'So, you're a man.
That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should be friends and live in peace for the rest of our days'.
Flattered, the man replies, 'Oh yes, I agree completely, this must be a sign from God! But you're still at fault...women shouldn't be allowed to drive.'
The woman continues, 'And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.'

She hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.

The woman takes the bottle, puts the cap back on and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, 'Aren't you having any?'
The woman replies, 'No. I think I'll just wait for the police....'

MORAL OF THE STORY:
Women are clever, evil ****es.. Don't mess with us.


A woman and a man...: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
jono7: emilio estevez


zsa zsa gabor gabour?


Celebrity Name Game!: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
jono7: emilio estevez


zsa zsa gabor gabour?


Celebrity Name Game!: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
rocketship: Canada is a great country!!!

You would be very welcome...especially if you have a skill high up on the list of required workers. Truckers were being hired from England last year and the companies facilitated their entry into Canada.

Check in with a Canadian gov't office in Ireland for information.

Good luck to you!!!



Hmmm... you look a little bit familiar wink cswelcome


Canada: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
Be yourself. Don't be afraid to contact women here. You can usually ( not always) tell if someone is a scammer.

Join a club outside of the computer that interests you, maybe cooking or hiking etc.


You will find most people here friendly and are always willing to help out.

cswelcome

Enjoy your time here.cheers


real people: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
Subject:
1. Aspire to be Barbie - the bitch has everything.

2. If the shoe fits - buy them in every color.

3. Take life with a pinch of salt... A wedge of lime, and a shot of tequila.

4. In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls!

5. Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days).

6. When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

7. Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality.

8. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

9. Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.

10. Don't get your knickers in a knot; it solves nothing and makes you walk funny.

11. When life gives you lemons in 2009 - turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka.

12. Remember where ever there is a good looking; sweet, single or married man there is some woman tired of his bullshit!

13. Keep your chin up, only the first 40 years of parenthood are the hardest.

14. If it has Tires or Testicles it's gonna give you trouble.

15. By the time a women realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong.

'Good friends are like stars.........You don't always see them, but you know they are always there' 'Remember yesterday, dream about tomorrow, but live for today'. Now smile and send to any girl wasting time at work, suffering from a hangover, or just suffering from life , that might need a reason to smile!


Words for Women to Live By :): click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
phoenixrising1: Over and over i read no players.... who are these people...what makes them different from an honest mate seeker...can i only talk to one person at a time to not be a player? what about you...are you a player....do you have more than one person interested in you now? ....will you give your sweety your password?


I'm a player;

I play board games, I play card games, I play in the water, and I used to play volleyball tongue

sorry, couldn't resist


what is a player: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
7% continued


25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words' In five years, will this
matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or
didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab
ours back.

41.. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

A holy man was having a conversation with God one day and said, 'God , I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like.'

God led the holy man to two doors..
He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in.

In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the
table was a large pot of stew, which smelled delicious and made the holy
man's mouth water.

The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They appeared to
be famished.

They were holding spoons with very long handles, that were strapped to their
arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a
spoonful.

But because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the
spoons back into their mouths.

The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering.

God said, 'You have seen Hell.'

They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as
the first one.

There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the
holy man's mouth water.

The people were equiped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the
people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking.

The holy man said, 'I don't understand..'
It is simple,' said God . 'It requires but one skill

You see they have learned to feed each other, while the greedy think only of
themselves.'

Its estimated 93% won't forward this. If you are one of the 7% who will,
forward this with the title '7%'.

I'm in the 7%

Remember that I will always share my spoon with you !

Friends are the family that we choose for ourselves



7%: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.. It
is the most-requested column I've ever written.

My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone...

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is
all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shoudn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never
blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19.. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up
to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an
answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.









7%: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
WOW Gordon,

Congratulations!!! I'm so happy that you have found someone here. You deserve it.

I wish you both much happiness.


laff (H)


Saying goodbye to my CS friends.: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
A Doctor in Newfoundland wanted to get off work and go

hunting, so he approached his assistant 'Garge, I am going hunting
tomorrow and I don't want to close the clinic.
I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all me patients'..

'Yes, sir!' answers Garge.

The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks:
'So, Garge, How was your day?'

Garge told him that he took care of three patients.
'The first one had a headache so I gave him TYLENOL.'

'Bravo Mate, and the second one?' asks the doctor.

The second one had stomach burning and I gave him MAALOX, sir'
says Garge.

'Bravo, bravo! You're good at this, and what about the third one?'
asks the doctor.

'Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters.
Like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her
bra and her panties and lies down on the table, spreading her legs
and shouts:
'HELP ME, for five years I have not seen any man!''

'Lard tunderin' Je*us, Garge, what did you do?' asks the doctor.

'I put drops in her eyes.'



A good ole newfie story. No offence intended: click here to read the entire thread »

laffingone Port Coquitlam, British Columbia Canada
In response to: Previous Thread locked. Last post was from Buzzy

word Alleviate

next word Elegant


trap


Let's Play a Game: click here to read the entire thread »

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