Sommerauer71 wrote:Thank you Nuala, you know, I left the country to get away from him, I had to, it was dragging me to a level that made me fearful, he and I met at a conference four years ago and that guy was having his girl.
After a long year, just being me, I feel I have reached a plateau with me as a person, his emotional level was so intense and he did support me in my relocation overseas, I think you are right, I am suffering guilt, I see a man that I no longer love and wish I could, but I cannot, there is nothing left for me to love in him, my friend has said it, she came one evening before I left and collected me and took me to her house, she then came to see me five months after I had gone and stated I was back to the person I always was.
I loved this man deeply, I suppose it is hitting me that I am no longer in love with him and I am trying to rationalise it, he is a smart wonderful, kind, generous handsome man, but all I see is a raging bull.
I am writing aimlessly, more so to read it back to myself, to ensure that I am no longer in love with him, business aside, I cannot own his anger, that is his to deal with and I have a decent level of emotional intelligence, but I feel as though I am falling back.
He is also still close to my friends and my children.
Well is always important to talk it out and as you say its to help you read back, so that is taking steps to move away from him emotionally. Just keep believing in yourself and always remind yourself he is part of your past and leave him there.....as far your business connection you can still keep that going but on your terms....