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Hmm. Funny thing here. I see a posting from a guy in Pisa and a guy in Bensalem and can relate to both. As a kid who grew up in both Pisa (right on V Del Brennero, just outside the wall) and stateside in the Philly area(what I'd give for a Tastykake®), I experienced both the Italian and American cultures as a native. As such, I don't have a problem letting my male friends know that I love them. The Italian side is ok with hugging and kissing on the cheek those people who live in my heart like my own family regardless of their gender. Then again, I dont' use words like "Friend" or "Love" casually. We overuse the word friend when what we mean is something far less intimate and use love where we wish to express a fondness and compatibility but something far less than that emotion which moves the very core of our spirit, LOVE. Funny though, that American ballplayers can pat each other on the butt and it's nothing.....go figure.....

Nah, you didn't offend me, I was just annoyed which is no big deal.

That's very true that I do show that I care about people. You know from personal experience.

I believe that "we are what we do....not what we say". If people lived up to what they say, it might make a better world.

Sorry if I hijacked your thread. Don't ya hate it when people do that

Thank you, my dear. Heart is indeed one thing I do have.

An interesting point...and I wonder if it's also more common, then, for friends to say "I love you" in languages where there is more than one word for it, denoting a different type of love. Especially same-gender friends.

I was leaving that part out on purpose.

You have an interesting viewpoint because of being raised in two very different cultures. And I will say that in the US, it can be partly what part of the country. Here it's mostly Hungarian/Serbian/Ukranian/Polish ancestry...middle European. Italians and French are more open in showing their affection, even when raised several generations in this country, but especially if they're first or second generation.

I think whether the word love is overused in friendship and acquaintance is an individual thing to some extent, though. To me, it's underused...but then the core of my spirit is LOVE. It's just who I am, and I need to express it. But I can respect the boundaries of those who don't hug as much, or say "I love you" as easily too.

We're getting a bit away from the cultural thing with that, though.

Actually, my threads are always welcome to hijack...as are my cupboard and fridge contents when I have guests. Always feel welcome to make yourself at home in them.

And friends can't hijack anything belonging to friends.

Yes, and one that's in the right place, Bill.

JMO.....Its alright to express the way you feel, male or female, yes in Europe men do kiss each other or hug....and many a time i have heard that been said to friends " Love you " when parting.....I think its quite cool...
I say it to my Friends male & female.....( only my good and close friends though)...

It just shows that you care...But who am I ????....

Real life friends yes, and long term ones too ~ otherwise they are acquaintances like you said.

Thank you. That helped answer part of my original question. I was wondering if there was a cultural tie-in to being able to express emotions more freely physically translating into being able to do so verbally.

And you're just as important as the rest of us, Roxaan.

Around here you know guys love each other when you see them punching each other with the fist either on the shoulder or the top part of the arm!


Strange creatures...

OMG...my life is over........(lets get wilde)....

Thanks Dru... And your Wecome...

Its a free world....If it only was more free emotions, would solve a lot of Problems in the World.....

I won't speak for other men, but this is my stand. Love has a patriachal element for me, which does not extend to my male friends. What I will do for, and tolerate from my family, lover and female friends(let's call them group A) is fundamentally different from my male friends(let's call them group B). I don't keep score with group A, if they need resources, and I can, I help, without concern for their willingness to balance the scales at a later time. Group B members do not need the ability to return favors, but they do need the desire too, or they can go live in a cardboard box for all I care. Group A members may enter my dominion and attempt to run things, it may irritate me a bit, but it's not a big problem. Group B members do not enjoy the same privilege. They'll get told once, maybe twice, and then it's time for them to leave. If they persist, they ain't coming back.

As you can see, it has nothing to do with homophobia. I'm a man, I'm competetive and territorial. I make allowances in my more basic traits, for those I love. I do not for other non-familial men.




The kissing thing is just unnatural, get out my personal space and stay out, other men have no business there unless we're sorting out dominance. We don't do that with kisses.

Yeah, they do a lot of that here, too. I don't get it.

Thank you, Ocee...and how interesting. I do appreciate your honesty, and your post also shows you know yourself well and have given this thought. And that last part just cracked me up. I'll bet I could win a dominance match with you with kisses...but then, I'm in group A as a female.

............. .............

J.D

I do think you're right with that, Roxaan. But then, there's still war in countries where emotions are expressed more freely. Maybe if we expressed positive emotions more and negative ones less.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXFoOYxMnvg&feature=related

Yeah ur right.....Still need more Love in the world....