Harassment, war and Tsu-Namis art of debating

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Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
Apostophe: My apologies good lady.

The captain asked for a definition and I thought let me show him exactly what he said - that is a perfect example of a personal attack. P.S.

And it's dirty.
No apology needed A, some people take responsibility for their posts.

Being called an abuser/bully/harrasser is an attack.

Another gentleman here, who was told he insulted all women, simply because he began a thread where he listed women from different countries.

Basically, it all boils down to this. That we love a good dust up. Those threads get the most hits, the most attention, why the religious get the most hits and current affairs, because people have their views and they cross and then the personal insults begin.

And in keeping with this thread, it is a deep, dark place where we all go, because we like it, even if we know nothing about the topic.

I was on a site for years, where there were elegant differences of opinion and the posters had the ability to see through that and could have a laugh the next day, unfortunately that was closed down. Othewise I would not be here, (some are I am sure, wishing it was still open, so that I would not be here)

It about the individuals belief and ability to be able to stand their corner, without personal feelings getting involved and that is not the case here. Because so many people are wrapped up with each other and it forms a pack mentality. I am close to four people, four people, who I know will lead me to a better place and support me, and not in a thread, the people I am close to rarely post in this forum. I don't want a long list of friends that will come in and fight my corner, because I can do it myself.

And that is the problem that I see, if a person supports me in my view, it is because they support what I have written and not me, I do the same, I don't hunt looking for playgrounds so I can have a punch up and it seems that I am involved when I am not even there. I don't want to be there, I don't like it, I don't enjoy it and I don't revel in it. I close the door quietly and I walk out.

We all have that need, disguised as being friends, being nice, we are all clever beings where words can punch and hit hard. And if we cannot feel, we hurt.

Dirty it is, nasty it can be, recovering it is hard, but I think we all can recover it if we really wanted to.



Apostophe Boksburg, Johannesburg South Africa
CaptainBeirutIII: That's fine, I haven't said anything was wrong with your definition, I asked two follow-up questions.




I don't see the point in this analogy.


Waste of bandwidth.


confused



steven6611 victor Harbor, South Australia Australia
rolling on the floor laughing It was so cute teddybear hang on its not quite a koala.

rolling on the floor laughing

hug



CaptainBeirutIII London, Inner London, England UK
Apostophe: I don't see the point in this analogy.Waste of bandwidth.


OK
Sorry to have wasted your time
Magenta Nimbin, New South Wales Australia
Sommerauer71: So, that is what you are getting at. As in the rules at the bottom of the page, it states that be careful what you post, because it becomes the property of CS.

With refernce to bringing that over the the thread that has been locked, you asked it to be closed, you now reopen it. It was an opinion on something that was posted for all members to see. Posted in another section of the forums, yet still available for all to see.

And here we go again.

Ah it's bloody good this place innit? We sre all those people who step in and love a good dust up.


Sommer, seeing as i cant email u. I do believe i owe u an apology for jumping down your throat on page 6 on the locked thread.

However, i do HAVE THE RIGHT TO DEFEND MYSELF against manipulated second-hand version emails, and half- truth chinese whispers of my PRIVATE LIFE.


For jumping on u, i am honestly sorry.

I was wrong to do thathandshake



Apostophe Boksburg, Johannesburg South Africa
Sommerauer71: No apology needed A, some people take responsibility for their posts.

Being called an abuser/bully/harrasser is an attack.

Another gentleman here, who was told he insulted all women, simply because he began a thread where he listed women from different countries.

Basically, it all boils down to this. That we love a good dust up. Those threads get the most hits, the most attention, why the religious get the most hits and current affairs, because people have their views and they cross and then the personal insults begin.

And in keeping with this thread, it is a deep, dark place where we all go, because we like it, even if we know nothing about the topic.

I was on a site for years, where there were elegant differences of opinion and the posters had the ability to see through that and could have a laugh the next day, unfortunately that was closed down. Othewise I would not be here, (some are I am sure, wishing it was still open, so that I would not be here)

It about the individuals belief and ability to be able to stand their corner, without personal feelings getting involved and that is not the case here. Because so many people are wrapped up with each other and it forms a pack mentality. I am close to four people, four people, who I know will lead me to a better place and support me, and not in a thread, the people I am close to rarely post in this forum. I don't want a long list of friends that will come in and fight my corner, because I can do it myself.

And that is the problem that I see, if a person supports me in my view, it is because they support what I have written and not me, I do the same, I don't hunt looking for playgrounds so I can have a punch up and it seems that I am involved when I am not even there. I don't want to be there, I don't like it, I don't enjoy it and I don't revel in it. I close the door quietly and I walk out.

We all have that need, disguised as being friends, being nice, we are all clever beings where words can punch and hit hard. And if we cannot feel, we hurt.

Dirty it is, nasty it can be, recovering it is hard, but I think we all can recover it if we really wanted to.



I have no friends here sommer and I travel alone. My problem is
that I like the playgrounds to be even (not the word I'm looking for -( my daughter is distracting me).

PPV can get a bit over the top when it comes to you and we all know that you can take care of yourself.



wave
rizlared ., Shanghai China
Apostophe: I don't see the point in this analogy.Waste of bandwidth.


And is that your opinion or did you borrow that from some previous thread????

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing













(this is said "Tongue in Cheek" that means it was meant to be funny not an insult)

Disclaimer: this post may cause offence; the Author absolves himself of responsibility for any cause or effect upon the reader



Apostophe Boksburg, Johannesburg South Africa
rizlared: And is that your opinion or did you borrow that from some previous thread????



(this is said "Tongue in Cheek" that means it was meant to be funny not an insult)

Disclaimer: this post may cause offence; the Author absolves himself of responsibility for any cause or effect upon the reader



I'm allowed to borrow ain't I?!





laugh
rizlared ., Shanghai China
Apostophe: I'm allowed to borrow ain't I?!


As long as you always acknowledge the source and return after use




Disclaimer: this post may cause offence; the Author absolves himself of responsibility for any cause or effect upon the reader



Apostophe Boksburg, Johannesburg South Africa
Magenta: Sommer, seeing as i cant email u. I do believe i owe u an apology for jumping down your throat on page 6 on the locked thread.

However, i do HAVE THE RIGHT TO DEFEND MYSELF against manipulated second-hand version emails, and half- truth chinese whispers of my PRIVATE LIFE.For jumping on u, i am honestly sorry.

I was wrong to do that



And as for you dear lady - you never apologise without getting another swipe in.


scold
Fallingman Dublin, Dublin Ireland
rizlared: And is that your opinion or did you borrow that from some previous thread????



(this is said "Tongue in Cheek" that means it was meant to be funny not an insult)

Disclaimer: this post may cause offence; the Author absolves himself of responsibility for any cause or effect upon the reader


Disclaimer: This poster is not necessarily in his right senses so reserves the right to attach disclaimers to other people's disclaimers! professor

laugh wave



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
Magenta: Sommer, seeing as i cant email u. I do believe i owe u an apology for jumping down your throat on page 6 on the locked thread.

However, i do HAVE THE RIGHT TO DEFEND MYSELF against manipulated second-hand version emails, and half- truth chinese whispers of my PRIVATE LIFE.For jumping on u, i am honestly sorry.

I was wrong to do that
Okay, let's put this to bed.

Nowhere have I said that you could not email me. I told you, that I would not read your emails, I would delete them unopened. That makes it difficult for any person, I agree. I did give you the opportunity, with one email to get your feelings out, you did. I read that and responded.

Here is what I do, in those moments, we all have them, those 'Have you seen what he/she has written' moments. I take my time, I never, ever respond in anger and I don't, for the benefit of the audience, with their buckets of popcorn, I do not go around pushing the send email button to people that I 'think' like me. If I have the need to ask for some guidance on how to respond, how to handle it, coz I' m not made of stone see, I am a human being, with thoughts, feelings, that are not always what will conform to other people's minds. I go to the people I trust who can guide me, here, only four of them and I put my hands up and I say, 'I fucked up here, help' And they, because they know me, guide me, they do not say, 'Goodness, you are beautiful and whatever you say, is correct, they say, 'Sommer, sometimes you are a bit out of the left field and I can understand why people feel that way and you can do this' And I don't go to Captain, stick up for me and speak for me.

I choose who my friends are very carefully so that there is no risk of what happened yesterday, people who do not want to play in these games.

And I am not so far up my own arse, full of myself, that I think I am never wrong. (That is not suggesting for one moment that you said that) I am wrong alot of the time. And when I apologise to a person, I mean it, I don't do it to make myself look good.

So Magenta, those are the things that I do. It is a lonely place being three dimensional and being aloof, and I like it that way. That's the way I want to keep it, and that leads to all sorts of speculations that are not true.

But, as a end to this, I am not so unhuman as to realise that I if and I do have offended a person then I will, put it right.

You have every right to defend yourself, as do I. And the rest of the Tom, Dicks, and Harrieta's in this world.

It's the end for me.



CaptainBeirutIII London, Inner London, England UK
Apostophe: PPV can get a bit over the top when it comes to you and we all know that you can take care of yourself.


If I was sat in the pub and every now and then I would overhear people talk about her, not very nice things, if I ignored it and let her handle all on her own, my mates would not praise me for not getting a bit over the top, they'd give me a stern look and wonder what the sod she was with me for, at all.
Fallingman Dublin, Dublin Ireland
CaptainBeirutIII: If I was sat in the pub and every now and then I would overhear people talk about her, not very nice things, if I ignored it and let her handle all on her own, my mates would not praise me for not getting a bit over the top, they'd give me a stern look and wonder what the sod she was with me for, at all.


In fairness I don't think it is the FACT of your defending Sommer (which is admirable) that is questioned....just occasionally the tone. However, I have no view on this, personally. wave



steven6611 victor Harbor, South Australia Australia
Its ok Sommer she has delted her account. Its a pity things have carried over to here because I felt this thread was a great way to start to mend some of the communication issues we have had on a few other forum threads.

hug



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
Fallingman: In fairness I don't think it is the FACT of your defending Sommer (which is admirable) that is questioned....just occasionally the tone. However, I have no view on this, personally.
Ah well, the tone, FM.

Yes, he is often misunderstood. Hard to read a tone though isn't it? As a person who is often responded to with a worryingly increasing amount of 'Your posts are condescending; then it would take me a week to change my tone. Can't speak for the old man though...

Actaully, we were just laughing, one of those moments, where we both said 'Can you imagine, on another board, where we post and we can have as much tone as we like, the moderators are well versed in heated debates and the language and what people are called is way beyond anything I have seen, on amy debates, then I would think that many people here would not last five minutes, because it is like they are offended when they enter the building and on the defensive.

Now each place is different and we all have our tolerance levels, if I went around telling everyone to fuck off and they were 'see you nezt Tuesdays,' then it is easier for people to respond. I don't, because and by the hell sometimes I want to, but I don't because I have respect for the way things are done around here.

I have a problem with people who go around being 'nice' and inspid all the time and drop into fights and say there there...

But I ignore it on the whole.

If most people have a defence mode about his tone, then all they have to do is ask him... Cos he is human too and remember as we are so often told, it is not his native language...



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
steven6611: Its ok Sommer she has delted her account. Its a pity things have carried over to here because I felt this thread was a great way to start to mend some of the communication issues we have had on a few other forum threads.
Hi Steve, Well that is her right to do so...



Apostophe Boksburg, Johannesburg South Africa
CaptainBeirutIII: If I was sat in the pub and every now and then I would overhear people talk about her, not very nice things, if I ignored it and let her handle all on her own, my mates would not praise me for not getting a bit over the top, they'd give me a stern look and wonder what the sod she was with me for, at all.



Point taken.
Fallingman Dublin, Dublin Ireland
Sommerauer71: Ah well, the tone, FM.

Yes, he is often misunderstood. Hard to read a tone though isn't it? As a person who is often responded to with a worryingly increasing amount of 'Your posts are condescending; then it would take me a week to change my tone. Can't speak for the old man though...

Actaully, we were just laughing, one of those moments, where we both said 'Can you imagine, on another board, where we post and we can have as much tone as we like, the moderators are well versed in heated debates and the language and what people are called is way beyond anything I have seen, on amy debates, then I would think that many people here would not last five minutes, because it is like they are offended when they enter the building and on the defensive.

Now each place is different and we all have our tolerance levels, if I went around telling everyone to fuck off and they were 'see you nezt Tuesdays,' then it is easier for people to respond. I don't, because and by the hell sometimes I want to, but I don't because I have respect for the way things are done around here.

I have a problem with people who go around being 'nice' and inspid all the time and drop into fights and say there there...

But I ignore it on the whole.

If most people have a defence mode about his tone, then all they have to do is ask him... Cos he is human too and remember as we are so often told, it is not his native language...


Well Sommer, I hope you are not accusing me of being NICE! laugh

In fairness to me, I did say it to Capt Underpants directly. Also, he can be a bit over the top sometimes but then we are all different. I don't have a defence mode about his or anyone else's tone (occasionally I get cross about being condescended to by idiots) and I think all are entitled to their view. But this is a good example of a debate that goes right off the rails because of perceived slights....which may not even be real.

dunno

wave



Sommerauer71 Salzburg, Salzburg Austria
Fallingman: Well Sommer, I hope you are not accusing me of being NICE!

In fairness to me, I did say it to Capt Underpants directly. Also, he can be a bit over the top sometimes but then we are all different. I don't have a defence mode about his or anyone else's tone (occasionally I get cross about being condescended to by idiots) and I think all are entitled to their view. But this is a good example of a debate that goes right off the rails because of perceived slights....which may not even be real.
I know you did post it to him, he's watching the Simpsons, where he gets all those craxy ideas from...

I don't disagree with you at all.

As for my words about 'nice' You are nice, but in a nice way.

Nice as in a way, that they are nice, but usually to be found in the threads being nice, yet stating that the whole thread is wrong, but bumping it to the top in being nice so that other people respond and then they can come back and be nice... No person in particular, it was just a lazy observation that I see occassionally.

And not you, hell you're nice, but really damn nice and I like that.




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