CjTenorSax: I am troubled by well-liked and Good Hearted People getting into trouble then banned. I came across a list of Rules My Parents and Grand Parents drilled into us.
These seem appropriate to list/share here as a reminder for all of us including myself.How to Get Along With People . . . 1. Keep skid chains on your tongue: always say less than you think. How you say it often counts more than what you say.
2. Make promises sparingly and keep them faithfully, no matter what it costs you. IF it is impossible to keep a promise, let it be because of circumstances beyond your control, an Act of G-d or War.
3. Never let an opportunity pass to say a kind and encouraging thing to or about somebody. Praise good work done, regardless of who did it. IF criticism is needed, criticize in a Helpful, Kind and Loving manner, NEVER spitefully. Also, be grateful to ones that care enough to criticize you in this manner.
4. Be interested in others: interested in their pursuits, their welfare, their homes and families. Let everyone you meet however humble, feel that you regard her/him as one of importance. Defend the Innocent, those unable to defend themselves and the wrongly accused.
5. Be cheerful. Keep the corners of your mouth turned up. Hide your pains, worries and disappointments under a smile. Laugh at good stories and learn to tell them.
6. Preserve an open mind on all debatable questions. DISCUSS, but not ARGUE. It is mark of superior minds to disagree and yet be friendly.
7. Let your virtues speak for themselves, and refuse to talk of another's vices. Make it a rule to say nothing of another unless it is something good. Also, remember two things: 1. Point a finger, have four pointing back at yourself; 2. Two wrongs a right do/does not make.
8. Be careful of another's feelings. Wit and humor at the other person's expense are rarely worth the effort.
9. Pay no attention to ill-natured people and/or remarks about you. Simply live in such a manner that nobody will believe them. Disordered nerves, indigestion and stress are a common cause of backbiting/backstabbing.
10. Don't be too anxious about your dues. Do your work, be patient and keep your disposition sweet, forget self and you will be rewarded.
Just think what this world would be like if everyone followed these.