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The most important thing is to talk to the kids, tell them how you feel about them. But don't let them dictate your life, make sure that they know that you have a right to feel something for somebody else and that they won't lose out because of that

It doesn't have to be like that. I haven't dated and my daughter is just now seven. I have been trying to protect her. But, if and when I start dating again, you can bet her safety and welfare will be at the top of my priority list. She will never be second best to anything, but she is also missing out if I could have met someone who would be great for both of us.

well i can certainly relate to all of this... i have three small kids... twin 3 year olds and a baby, and their father isn't allowed any contact with one, barely knows the baby, she has pretty well forgotton him, at this age, i'm worried about them being confused by all of this, but they are really not old enought to explain anything to them... so unless i am very, very certain of something then they haven't seen them... i have to be honest about my kids and try to explain the best i can to the kids what mommy is up to. my oldest daughter has taken to calling her grandpa daddy, and my baby is just now beginning to come up with d sounds in her speech, although she has said mama for quite some time now. my son could care less however because he's a mama's boy but does need a good male influence and someone to rough him up so to speak... hey i can't do everything... so it is really kinda confusing, but you eventually will have to make the leap... you should really communicate openly with kids about who you are dating, if they feel that their opinion matters, which it really should to a certain extent... they will handle it better... it just depends on how mature they are and what kind of relationship you should have with them.- if you are honest with them and communicate openly and respectfully you can be sure that they will be more likely to do the same and isn't that what we all want

it's a good teaching tool and should be used for that at times, just not excessively...

On the last date I had with a woman had two small boys she died of a heart attack on the date. We were making out in the back room and the two boys were playing Nintendo in the living room. The month that we had together we went swimming; to picnics and shopping at Walmart. I really got attached to her two boys. She had come over to visit me and later her employer came to drive her van home. The sherrif drove the boys to be with the grand parents. One should be ready for emotional attachments with children in dating even though it is the adult that you are dating. In a way though I was like a father figure to the boys during the dating process. It can get complicated to say the least.

Wow I almost forgot about this post. Been busy with work and getting ready for the holidays. Update..... I have been on like two dates since this post. They were with the ex both times. Neither amounted to anything either I am too damn picky or not ready yet not sure which. I am still unsure how I would ever bring a new friend into my girls life. As far as the evil step mother post that would never even get close to happening. My girls welfare and happyness if the first priority in my life.

Just say no

Be very careful when bringing your children into somebodys life. I made the mistake of doing that and got dumped the other day. My son is only 2 and a half but he is still going to be confused. he has been saying Nikki (my ex) and Kiersten (her daughter) the past couple days.

Everybody told me to wait before bringing him around but i thought this was for real and brought him around anyway. I guess I should have listened to all the advice.