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Oh...

I would have to say yes. If your heart is still
with someone else. How can you fully give your
heart to someone new. I believe many have had
someone that holds a special place in their hearts.
The question is, how much of it does that person
possess? Too much to start something new? I don't
know.

I will cherish that passed love... Anyone I meet is liable to have this same 'issue' and I would like to think I am mature enough to understand when they sometimes look a bit faraway as if reliving some past enjoyment.

But when what I find finds me I have no doubt it will fan a fire which will make any 'torch' appear a mere ember.



AB

I have got a lot of help in here. I came in here with a lot of issues. I still have issues but not as many as I once had. I am really enjoying the friendships now. I don't have the deep lonliness and the deep emptiness. I have normal loneliness, now. I have dealt with a lot as I am sure many in here have. It is ok just to be single today. It is not idea but it is ok. I can live with it.

another point not to be taken lightly Urs if you are comfortable with askin the question should speak volumes on your willingness to atleast try to move on regardless of circumstances but ultimately our opinions are just that and you have to make the choice. love doest end simply because the persons involved are no longer compatible quite the opposite happens actually your love for that person stays in full effect it somehow gets hidden away only to resurface as a fond memory it will happen and some guy will sweep you off of your feet and im sure there are several guys here that have been swept away by your caring nature so stick to your guns for thats who you are and what makes you strong JMO

Wow this thread has really made me think and I can say you hit the nail on the head for me. When I came here there was a little feeling of guilt becuase I have been seeing someone that isn't fully ready to commit we have talked about not being comitted to eachother right now but I know my heart is with him. So, no I don't think its fair to myself, or him, or other people to make this even more complicated. Sheesh Im ready to take myself off of here now. I guess my only suggestion is to make it very clear where you have been, how you feel now and where you are going...if you even know I sure don't

I think it is entirely possible that you can meet a new person and develop a love that will put a past, "lingering" love behind you; not that you forget it/miss it/dwell on it, but simply allow you to move on without regrets, keeping the past love a pleasant memory of just that, the past.

When the time is right for that individual, there's nothing wrong with moving on and trying to find someone to be happy with even if your heart is devoted to another. Your heart won't always be devoted to that person unless your lucky enough to have that person come back to you and your heart is still devoted to them.

Ken

Yes and you have described more or less what i was talking about...

The only thing i question..is when will it be "fair"...he's not ready to commit...and you respect that it seems...so what should you really do??? Sit and wait??...what if the next person is ready to commit to you and you to them...how would you have known...

I believe i have said in another thread..the words "I'm IN LOVE with you" seldom crosses my lips (I have no problem with saying I love anyone or anything..its the "in love" part that chokes me)...because i know when i say them, i will never take them back...regardless of what happens in the future...

I have never stopped "loving" the people of my past...but i am realistic enough to know all the love in the world cannot make a relationship last if its not meant to be...so i moved on...that does not mean to say that i cannot be just as loving and devoted to another partner though...

Giving up someone is a very hard thing to do. If you both agree that there is no chance of a further relationship, you must look into your heart and ask yourself is it time to "move on" There will always be some small little voice in the back of your mind that will question what ever you decide to do. It is never a good idea to go looking for another, most of the time you end up with the wrong person. In answer to your question, there is nothing wrong with looking or chatting on line, but you have to be comfortable with whatever you choose to do.

Thats exactly what I am trying to figure out so I appreciate that you posted this thread...if I sit and wait and he decides that there will be no commitment then I have waisted my time.....If not then at least I have met some wonderful people in the long run if not for just friends.But the guilt kills me. I would be honest with this guy....A few weeks back I told him I was going on a date....he then told me he didnt own me, we werent committed, but he was afraid of losing me....Then I decided not to go....he cant have their cake and eat it too. Its good in a way and bad in a way...Meaning I guess that gives me some hope with him, but at the same time makes me feel guilty. Its a catch 22 if I date I will feel bad, and Im one of those bitter honest people so I would never keep it from him, but at the same time If I just sit here then I may be waisting time....so with those words said I guess that since there is no book on dating we have to learn from experiences and I am just glad to hear others opinions on this. I guess it dosent pay to be brutally honest all the time , huh?

These are the emotions that separate men and women...

We are TWO different genders...we are not going to see the same situation the same...we are not going to handle it the same...

But until people are willing to concede that both sexes are ENTITLED to do what comes naturally to them a battle of the sexes will always exist...it doesn't make us right...it doesn't make us wrong...it makes us what we are...

All I can say is great question for the many that are on here and confused.

Why sit on a fence?

Time is precious....

I`m here for therapy

wisdom beyond your years, very smart lady

I have to believe and understand that in our lifes if you break up and they really meant something,you will carry them with you.Regardless if the breakup say was not wanted or wanted for some reason you part ways.And in doing this you have to end it in your head,it never ends in your heart.OK,i know i am going to hear oh hell no i dont think about him or her at all then you will be lying to yourself .How can you not even with all the abuse i did suffer sometimes i reflect on the good times that were had.Or a song comes on to remind you of a moment in time.You cannot tell me this doesnt occur.Then comes the time and for some reason or another you must let go.There was one on here that was my pick of the litter but distance played a part in the deciding of.Its all good and im not tearing down the place to find someone.wHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU KNOW YOU HAVE THAT EVERLASTING THING AS I DID AND AFTER 11 YEARS I HAD TO WALK AWAY.And i did knowing and fearing i might never get this feeling back.Its scary to say the least .But yet we go on looking ,waiting ,and hoping he or she will be the one.

biatch....make up your freakin' mind... Available or Not???

okay first who you calling a biatch and who needs to make up their mind?

Hmmmyep u should def. be on here - if not just for a distraction to keep u from lookin over the past 24/7. ur trying new things , meeting new ppl - its just natural , even if u find them only as friends

WHEN A MAN LOVES A WOMAN,he'll move mountains it seems, just sit by her side. If he does not know you by now! He will never, never know you. As for me I am on a quest my heart was mistakenly placed in the wrong hands . It took me 8 years to MOVE ON... It is not a plesent task. Good luck. DOES LOVE CONCOR ALL? SOMETIMES YOU GET THE BEAR AND SOMETIMES THE BEAR GET YOU.
Best wishes.
RAF