Re: Russian bride sammer - enlightening times (multipart)
My Reply:
Oh dear!
Pinch me! Pinch me! Ouch! Not that hard! My neighbour always tells me "Nah, you old fool, angels don't exist!" and I never used to believe him, you know, I have a strong heart and I am pretty firm that angels may indeed exist, you never know. So I took you printed picture over to him and said, "You old dumb ass, what do you call this fairy on this picture? He put on his thick glasses and shouted "Oy, what an angel!". So from this moment we both believed in angels.
Oh don't be embarrassed by not knowing what to write. I never knows it either, so whenever I write a letter I always start with "I am not a scammer, nor a spammer and neither a..." bummer, I forgot the word. But that clears the waters and develops trust straight away. You know we need trust nowadays because there is so little trust in the world. Last time I went to the corner shop for some eggs, but forgot my wallet... oh no, I had my wallet with me, but didn't have change because I changed my trousers which had the change and forgot to change it back when I went to the corner shop so when I wanted to pay my change was in the trousers I changed and because I only had a $12000 note in my wallet I couldn't pay for the eggs. Oh, so much trouble for getting a few eggs! The old lady in the corner shop saw that I had money in my wallet as I waved the $12000 note in front of her, but hey, I didn't want to exchange it to small notes, how foolish that would have been. I also knew she didn't have enough cash, so I said, I would pay for the eggs another time. She pushed her glasses on top of her head - funny she did that because she has no eyes there - and said to me "Old man, I don't trust you". How could she not trust me, for I am not a scammer, nor a spammer, neither a bummer and I had plenty of money, she saw my $12000 note in my hand, is it my fault that she didn't have enough change?
Your 26 years of age is really good for a long-term relationship, for if you live to 90 then it would mean a 64 years long relationship. I will live only for another 5 years as I am so old now that I cannot even see the eye phone, so it is not an eye phone to me, I don't know why they call it like that, it should rather be eye-has-not-seen phone. And that 5 years is the best estimate, so your relationship with me would be not so long-term, so I guess a 70 years old grandma would have the same mileage with me as you and her 70 year would be just as good age for a long-term relationship. But you know, in my age I get bored with women too quick, so 5 years is already very long-term for me.
Did the agency gave you my email address? How exciting! There was a tv series about the Agency. You know, the CIA. I never knew they moved into a match making business also under the disguise of "Lovely Hearts". I am pretty sure they are smart enough to figure out my email address. Maybe I should call them the next time I forget it. How exciting! An agency that remembers my email. Even my old friend doesn't remember it. He used to tell me, "You silly old bugger, don't you know that all scammers have Yahoo email addresses? Go and get one, they are easy to remember". But, you know, I never listen to him.
I know darling, you are right, silly sounds return great results. I used to do that all the time in the toilet. Guess what! It always works. And now it worked for you also.
Take care my precious little angel and write to me because I am so much in love with you already that I keep on making these little cute silly sounds and expect great results back from you also.
George grandpa
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