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*ching ching*...here's my 2 cents........this is ESSENTIAL for me...i dont think alot of people understand what unconditional love means...even in parenting these days it seems to be a problem. Love is tough, when you enter into it, your doing it with a whole person, not just the parts you like and hope the rest will just go away. It is horribly wrong to just cut and run when things arent to your exact likeing,,,you knew they were there before,,why should they now be a suprise?..the exception being abuse etc of course but in most other cases dont make someone believe you understand what forever means and then turn around and decide its just easier to run.

Most of you are saying the same thing, that what's on the inside only counts if you like what's on the outside. What about giving someone a little time and getting to know them? You might find that the inside will more than make up for any outside deficiencies. Think about someone who is blind and how they "see" a partner. They must totally rely on the inside qualities of a person instead of looks. Believe it or not, there are some of us who would like to find someone based on their inner qualities rather than how they look.

Hey Roxy50, you have a very beautiful soul, well put.I hope you continue to post on the forum. Why can't men go for the inner qualities, instead of looks? Sigh.....

I have been initially attracted to men who were very good looking on the outside and found out later that the inside wasn't worth the eye candy. And then, I have been around men who I probably wouldn't have picked out of a crowd, but they were so secure with who they were, I saw them as total hunks.

Yes, men and women are both guilty of looking @ the wrapping, but it is the present inside that counts. Once you rip away the pretty paper and ribbons, it can be a big let down to find out you have just unwrapped a box of rocks.

One thing I have learned is that men seem to find me more attractive when I feel attractive. I have really had to work hard on seeing something pretty in the mirror. I have days when my "self talk" does a better job on making me attractive than it does on other days.

At this point, if someone can not accept me the way I am, it is their loss. I might not be wrapped in the prettiest paper, but I am one heck of a gift! (It took months of therapy for me to be able to say that!)

Hey lakelady51! I from Anniston. I liked what you had to say in your posting, and maybe I need to start liking myself more, quit giving men permission to put me down(btw, no one can put you down without your permission), and realize that I am a beautiful lady, and if a man can't accept the way I look, then he will be missing out on getting to know me. You are a very beautiful soul, thanks for being on the forum, Betty G.

I'm runnin with Froggy on this one.

Gotta accept yourself first.

Sure is a lot of dwelling on the negatives. Everyone you meet will merely follow suit.

I agree that first we must love ourselves. Secondly, we look for someone who will love us for who we are not who they want us to be. It's getting past the first look at our outward appearance that is problematic for those who are not in current fashion. I know that whomever is meant to be with me will be getting one heck of a perfect deal if he can see the real me not just my looks. That is the recipe for a great relationship. I will also try to see the real him not just his looks. After all, it is a two way street.

Well you can't accept someone for who they are not.

Roxy50, I love your outlook on life, thanks for being on the forum, Betty :)

You first have to accept yourself first ...love yourself
If you feel bad about yourself (low self esteem) you will always put yourself in a position of being with a person whom lacks respect for you.Your self worth is everything

Betty you have beauty inside and out ....

Gord

Ps The comment is targeted at you Betty just a generalized statement

You first have to accept yourself first ...love yourself
If you feel bad about yourself (low self esteem) you will always put yourself in a position of being with a person whom lacks respect for you.Your self worth is everything

Betty you have beauty inside and out ....

Gord

Ps The comment is targeted at you Betty just a generalized statement

sorry not targeted

Someone who doesn't accept you, for who you are DOES NOT deserves to fight for!

It is who you are, and not what you are!

Love is not a fight for acceptance, it is the most soft, tender feelings and at the same time grows strong every day. It fills you life every second of it, with comfort and happiness that goes both ways!

In my opinion, someone who doesn't know what is really important in a person, needs a lot to learn yet, by himself/herself (it goes both ways).

Really and Truely, Love yourself and the rest will come along!

if you cant except a person for who they are then you are wasting your time and her time.

Hey Gord, thank you for the beautiful comment about me having beauty inside and out. Made my day. You are such a sweetie, BG.

Sure, as long as their not completly nutzoid

but a little crazy, Hell yea! I can deal with that.

Hey Hey Lum welcome back we didn't know what the heck happened you disappeared!

hey illum ,glad to see you back.lots of tarts for everyone.

I'll give you tart ya puff pastry!

Thanks guys, I had some temporary trouble with a certain over the top admirer

But it's all to good now!