Diet Excuses

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Oslojente Olso Norway
But the doughnut was calling my name.


I felt left out because they were eating.


But it was my birthday, so I had to eat the whole cake.


The kids overseas are starving, so naturally I have to clean my plate.


I had to get the bitter taste out of my mouth from eating the so- called dish, so I had an ice cream.


If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.


If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda.


When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you don't eat more than they do.


Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as hot chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.


If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.


Movie related foods (Milk Duds, Buttered Popcorn, Junior Mints, Red Hots, Tootsie Rolls, etc.) do not have additional calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.


Cookie pieces contain no fat - the process of breaking causes fat leakage. Exception: Cookies sold by TEXAS D'LITES distributors. Great "Meal Replacement" with little or no FAT content, low in calories, lots of fiber, protein, and other nutritional ingredients.


Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process of preparing something. Examples are peanut butter on a knife making a sandwich and ice cream on a spoon making a sundae.


Foods that have the same color have the same number of calories. Examples are: spinach and pistachio ice cream; mushrooms and white chocolate. NOTE: Chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other food color.


Foods that are frozen have no calories because calories are units of heat. Examples are ice cream, frozen pies, and Popsicles.

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RobbieM Hertford, Hertfordshire, England UK
For those who can relate can i suggest a new T shirt with "Chubs" on the front, and sponsered by "sara lee" on the back....mind you canburies might pay more......
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constanza Los Angeles, California USA
laugh cool
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roseofsharon Buggered if I know where...?!!, Hampshire, England UK
"If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories" .....yeah, and.....??!!

What....??!! Are you saying that's not true...???
D'oh!

Bugger.... and I was working sooooooo hard on being a rake by the time I was 70...!! grin
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Ambrose2007 Badger, South Dakota USA
In response to:
But the doughnut was calling my name.


I felt left out because they were eating.


But it was my birthday, so I had to eat the whole cake.


The kids overseas are starving, so naturally I have to clean my plate.


I had to get the bitter taste out of my mouth from eating the so- called dish, so I had an ice cream.


If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.


If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda.


When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you don't eat more than they do.


Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as hot chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.


If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.


Movie related foods (Milk Duds, Buttered Popcorn, Junior Mints, Red Hots, Tootsie Rolls, etc.) do not have additional calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.


Cookie pieces contain no fat - the process of breaking causes fat leakage. Exception: Cookies sold by TEXAS D'LITES distributors. Great "Meal Replacement" with little or no FAT content, low in calories, lots of fiber, protein, and other nutritional ingredients.


Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process of preparing something. Examples are peanut butter on a knife making a sandwich and ice cream on a spoon making a sundae.


Foods that have the same color have the same number of calories. Examples are: spinach and pistachio ice cream; mushrooms and white chocolate. NOTE: Chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other food color.


Foods that are frozen have no calories because calories are units of heat. Examples are ice cream, frozen pies, and Popsicles.

I'm just the kind of person who really, really likes food! I just love to cook, and to test it requires eating it.mumbling
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CLLGEGRL San Antonio, Texas USA
Birthdays and Holidays are the exceptions to dieting. It's a rule !!!!!!!!! dancing *M*
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DinaD Bristol, Tennessee USA
I think some of the people I have known on "diets", actually believed a lot of that.
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p_seg Central, Xlokk Malta
In response to:
But the doughnut was calling my name.


I felt left out because they were eating.


But it was my birthday, so I had to eat the whole cake.


The kids overseas are starving, so naturally I have to clean my plate.


I had to get the bitter taste out of my mouth from eating the so- called dish, so I had an ice cream.


If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.


If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda.


When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you don't eat more than they do.


Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as hot chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.


If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.


Movie related foods (Milk Duds, Buttered Popcorn, Junior Mints, Red Hots, Tootsie Rolls, etc.) do not have additional calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.


Cookie pieces contain no fat - the process of breaking causes fat leakage. Exception: Cookies sold by TEXAS D'LITES distributors. Great "Meal Replacement" with little or no FAT content, low in calories, lots of fiber, protein, and other nutritional ingredients.


Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process of preparing something. Examples are peanut butter on a knife making a sandwich and ice cream on a spoon making a sundae.


Foods that have the same color have the same number of calories. Examples are: spinach and pistachio ice cream; mushrooms and white chocolate. NOTE: Chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other food color.


Foods that are frozen have no calories because calories are units of heat. Examples are ice cream, frozen pies, and Popsicles.

Nice ones Oslo!!!

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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JewelLiz Yarmouth, Maine USA
As Richard Simmons said
What are the first three letters of "diet"
D
I
E


Now really is that what you are trying to do??? Make sense to me!
And besides Mama always told me to finish what was on my plate...and NO ONE I mean NO ONE argued with MAMA!rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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p_seg Central, Xlokk Malta
Btw, has anyone heard of the see food diet? grin

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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olive111 pdown, Down, Northern Ireland UK
rolling on the floor laughing love it!

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