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I will weigh in on the nice guy versus bad boy debate. Lets be honest here, women don't like nice guys. They like men who they perceive as a challenge, they like men who are dangerous, they like men who they feel will protect them in a fight.

When a guy comes across as nice, women perceive that to be weak. This myth is backed up heavily in pop culture, just look at the covers of romance novels which feature muscle-bound, Fabio clones ripping women's clothes off. The problem is the tough, brooding unpredictable guy is not very reliable. And sometimes being with a dangerous man can land a woman in hot water, ask Pamela Anderson and Whitney Houston.

Better on a shelf warm and dry,

then out in the cold, no?

I'd rather be as some wanna be song writer put it

I,m just a drifetr in from the rain
Not your hero on some stage
A rider on this train
And Ill come and go again
But tonite I can be your lover.
Someday I'll be your friend

Ah, but do they have your mind, Uli?

I will weigh in on the nice guy versus bad boy debate. Lets be honest here, women don't like nice guys. They like men who they perceive as a challenge, they like men who are dangerous, they like men who they feel will protect them in a fight.

When a guy comes across as nice, women perceive that to be weak. This myth is backed up heavily in pop culture, just look at the covers of romance novels which feature muscle-bound, Fabio clones ripping women's clothes off. The problem is the tough, brooding unpredictable guy is not very reliable. And sometimes being with a dangerous man can land a woman in hot water, ask Pamela Anderson and Whitney Houston.

Isnt that similar to sittin' on a shelf?

Women's strengths are being soft, sweet, and pliable, whereas men's are being hard, sour, and inflexible?

Seriously, for one, I think women are stronger than men (in general) at facing their emotions; they're more comfortable with their emotions (in general!) than are men. Men are perhaps more easily able to set aside their emotions to take purposeful actions (such as pursuing certain goals). I think men are more naturally inclined, in general again, to take the initiative and lead; women are more inclined generally to take a less direct approach, and are more willing to follow.

Please remember - these are generalizations!

...... but I cannot tell you just how greatly I rejoice at heart when the man (be it for dating, business or whatever) actually CAN find the place where we arranged to meet, without whining, calling me on the phone, complaining etc. Major bonus points!!!

I also absolutely hear you regarding the dominance thing and finding a partner stronger than yourself. Geez. You'd think they'd naturally be stronger in all aspects owing to their sex, but nooooo.... I am tired of having to plan what we're going to do, arranging where we're going to go, studying the maps, tanking up the car, driving us there (!!), thinking of things to say to keep the conversation going, plus hearing complaints about the wrong kind of weather, a little rain, poor/expensive food at the roadside restaurant, cough/cold/sniffles about to begin, etc etc etc. I am wondering if ever in life I will have someone - preferably a man indeed - actually arrange things and take us someplace nice, so I can finally sit in that passenger seat and just enjoy the scenery and his company. I am beginning to forget how it actually feels

I'm may be a real bad boy....

but baby...I"m a real good man....

I'm may be a real bad boy....

but baby...I"m a real good man....

Are you propositioning me?

How totally flattering......

Jeff, you please remember what AudrysSiswrote:

So where does " I think men are more naturally inclined, in general again, to take the initiative and lead; women are more inclined generally to take a less direct approach, and are more willing to follow" with her experience and my recent (and lifelong) experience fit in???

Maybe your experiences are the exceptions that prove the rule, Uli? (Or mine are.)

I don't know. It's hard to conduct a debate on something that is dependent mainly on one's observations/experiences. A lot of men really dislike things like selecting out a restaurant or mapping a trip, considering those things to be "hassles" that women are better-equipped emotionally to handle. Men, I think, tend to be a bit more impatient in general than women, tend to favor immediate and direct action. But of course, those are generalizations that can suffer many exceptions, so I often wonder what the point in making them is.

I'd turn this around and ask you,Uli, what you think the essential differences between women and men are (that's really the question being asked here, I think).

Jeff

A lot of men really dislike things like selecting out a restaurant or mapping a trip, considering those things to be "hassles" that women are better-equipped emotionally to handle. Jeff

What gets me is when the guy won't decide on the restaurant...asks me where I'd like to go....I give him a suggestion & he comes back with "I can't afford that"....so I'm like, why'd you ask me? This mentality can cause some problems. If a guy knows what he can afford, then he should just choose & not ask....lol