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It would be a fair statement to say that all of us on this site have been involved in several relationships...

I would be willing to bet those partners were chosen because they were what we felt we "wanted" at the time...

At this stage do you put more into considering what you may "need" in a partner rather than what you "want" in a partner?

I have met and dated several men in the past couple of years...men that would still be my partners now if i felt they are who i "need" in my life right now, rather than who i "want" in my life...and it was a bitter pill to swallow...

How are you deciding?...Your wants or your needs?

Needs most definately.

I need to feel I can respect and admire her. I need to feel attracted to her. I need her to be my best friend and confident.

Hell, I just need her!

sometimes there is a very fine line between need and want and it is hard to choose, but for the most part ,at my age i would have to go with the need over the want.

My needs are met for me... I have my life just about where I want it.

I'm not looking for someone I *neeed*

I want someone I *want*

your being summoned in the Truth or Dare forum

I cannot speak of others, I only speak of Patrick. I have had many relationships, all of the women in my life have been wonderful in some aspect.

"Patrick", had no clue as to what he wanted or needed, he did not know when he was well off, he was never satisfied.

Today, lessons learned in life. "ALL" women are beautiful in their own right, they are all "jellybeans"..

Thats a fair statement Eupho...

But when i said "need" i don't mean materialistic things...or even emotional...

What i need is someone who stimulates my mind as much as he can stimulate my body..

A passive person would be overshadowed by my aggressive nature..

Looks fade over time...i need someone who will still retain their "passion" long after physical appearance has waned...

Does that make sense?

Oh I totally agree but for me I would replace the word need for want.. up there ^

Once you've experienced that erotic 'charge', it kinda leaves you needing it whomever you're with.

It's like a drug.

It's got to be special and utterly intoxicating!

...i need someone who will still retain their "passion" long after physical appearance has waned...



Passion n. 1. A fit of violent anger; as, he flew into a "passion". 2. intence feeling or enlightenment; 3. sexual excitement; 4. love; adore; intence desire or feeling; as, a passion for music; 5. pl., the emotions collectively.

I understand where you are coming from with this I think, but like Eupho I am more interested now in what I want.


There are some things that are just more fun with a partner - dancing and conversation are not actually the first that come to mind - I have a very complete, satisfying life on all levels, all my needs are taken care of.

I just need to recognize what it is I want when it crosses my path.

I completely agree Detente.. but for me I would be *wanting* that not needing it.

There are several men on here that i "want"...

But at the end of the day...they are not what i "need"...and my "needs" have to be met for me to be satisfied...not just my "wants"

But the connecting question is, do we, at all times, really know what we need or do we "think" we know what we need? Today, I know beyond doubt, all of my needs are met.

For me, what i " need " i am pretty capable of getting it for myself or rather would see to it i am. I dont like the feeling of having someone to make him suit or meet my needs and vice-versa.

But i want someone to want me to be a part of his life irreplacable and never get tired of it. Same way i would like to feel about the person too.
Now in this kind of want situation the feeling of needing each other acquires a different perspective .

I need to be secure about the relation and not be obsessed about the " feeling " of being together. I am just not willing to make a fool out of anyone.

and my "needs" have to be met for me to be satisfied...not just my "wants"

That is the part I have never understood. I don't expect anyone else to 'meet' my needs, that is my job. no wonder I am single.

But if you're a natually passionate and erotically appreciative person, that want COULD be a need...something intrinsically linked to who you are...your emotional and physical makeup.

Just a thought.

Personally, I wound not want one in my life unless they would rather be there than anyplace else..

I, like a few others here, feel that my needs are being met...and this encompasses a wide variety of needs. It is the wants that aren't being satisfied. I am not wanting someone based on shallow or superficial qualities; I want someone in my life whose character and wit and intelligence and demeanor (etc.) are in tune with mine (not identical...in sync) and whose company I adore and who feels the same about me. I don't NEED this....but I definitely want this. I guess I just view a need as something you MUST have (food, clothing, shelter, for example). Wants are wish-lists; I will survive without them, I will carry on and endure and thrive and succeed or fail, etc., but, DAMN!!! It sure would be nice to have what I want!