Q: How does a man show he's planning for the future?
A: He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
One day a guy was driving with his 4-year-old daughter
and beeped his car horn by mistake.
She turned and looked at him for an explanation.
He said, "I did that by accident."
She replied, "I know that, daddy."
He replied, "How'd you know?"
The girl said, "Because you didn't say 'A$$HOLE!' afterwards!"
A woman asks: "Why don't men get mad cow disease?"
Another woman replies: "Because men are pigs!"