Friend from past calls (any help would be great)

constanza
Los Angeles, California USA

Posted: Jan 30, 2008, 12:03 AM CST

The way I look at it, you are entitled to make some mistakes, too

and at this point after everything you have told us, I'm in your camp; it's an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth, so own and live your life as you see fit and make your kid happy; screw the enemy

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

Rbadmc
Princeton, British Columbia Canada

Posted: Jan 30, 2008, 1:36 AM CST

thats what i was thinkin because I have tried

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

constanza
Los Angeles, California USA

Posted: Jan 30, 2008, 1:38 AM CST

Rbadmc wrote:

thats what i was thinkin because I have tried

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

Rbadmc
Princeton, British Columbia Canada

Posted: Jan 30, 2008, 1:45 AM CST

But for some reason still feel guilty like I have not done enough I do all the chores and leave her love notes nothing seems to work

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

constanza
Los Angeles, California USA

Posted: Jan 30, 2008, 1:50 AM CST

Rbadmc wrote:

But for some reason still feel guilty like I have not done enough I do all the chores and leave her love notes nothing seems to work

I was suspecting guilt played a large part in this; it's called manipulation and it takes two to play it.

Walk away or go play with your other friend

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

hillbillyhoney
belfry, Kentucky USA

Posted: Jan 30, 2008, 3:19 AM CST

Rbadmc wrote:

Someone from my past has come back into my life after her finding me, she held my name on piece of paper and in her heart for near 30 years never did I think she would ever get a hold of me and the way she got a hold of me was really cool too. Now I will say I am not the best writer in the land but here goes. Now normally I would never even consider doing this but its time I did because I want a real friend for life. I have fallin in love with this woman I cant get her out of my head all she and I have done has been msn and the phone when she phoned me after getting to me in a strange but afective way. Now I have seen her pic and she is hot, but that is not what I’m in love with, she sounds like me she likes the same thing as I do we sound the same to me. Anway to shrten this up is the task at hand. My wife has been more or less has been gone for two years now, but we still live together I still love her, but I know she is seeing someone else we have talked about it and she says she has no intention of stopping this relationship when I say gone I mean she is never here for me anymore and do so want her very much and she knows it I have never ever looked at another woman because she was my first love and we have been married for over 17 years now we have a child together. I guess I should get to my point. Is it rong of me to have fallin in love with another woman she is all I can think about this is really starting to keep me up at nights thinking of her everything I do I can’t seem to get her out of my head and she wants to come see me she does not know I feel this way about her or maybe she does I don’t know I have not asked her because even this way she is like a sister and that way I would never loose her, and the rest of the question, what would you do cause I am lost now?

I just got dizzy reading that and it takes alot to get me that way.I'm going to answer you in an eye opening way.You are cheating in your mind and possibly in your heart.And you are being downright disloyal to the vows you have made.Why are you and the wife still together the normal answer would be love but you have stepped all around it.You deserve a wake up call.You need to meet her and her turn out to be a psycho like Michael Douglas had a hold of.There can be nothing but pain for one or both,so cut loose one of them romeo.

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

Aries01
Dublin, Dublin Ireland

Posted: Jan 30, 2008, 5:59 AM CST

Rbadmc wrote:

I should say that I have no thaughts of cheating it would be ended

Only you really know the answer to this question because only you know the thruth of the situation between you and your wife. I would suggest that if it is true that you and your (ex-wife) are beyond repair and your wife has 'moved on' then maybe discuss this with her... at this stage you can simply outline that you have met this person who you regard as 'special' and want to have a friendship with and take it slow.. you also really need to think about what direction you are taking with ur former relationship...

If it is GENUINELY beyond repair, then maybe you need to think about moving on in a real way yourself...

In the meantime keep contact with this person if you have genuine feelings.. be honest, explain the situation and set yourself a realistic time frame for sorting it out... it would not be fair to invite this person into your life as more than a friend if your heart lies elsewhere or there is hope for your marraige..

Hope I haven't rambled too much

Best of luck!!

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

lusciousmile
Espoo, Etela-Suomen Laani Finland

Posted: Jan 30, 2008, 6:02 AM CST

constanza wrote:

I was suspecting guilt played a large part in this; it's called manipulation and it takes two to play it.

Walk away or go play with your other friend

@ 'Go play with your other friend'

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

Rbadmc
Princeton, British Columbia Canada

Posted: Feb 1, 2008, 2:28 PM CST

Just so you all know I have decided to leave my wife. As ther is nothing to mend here, i have given to much time now. I have told the other girl my intentions and i will leave it at that. she is the best friend I belive I want so only time will bring us together and i am so looking foreward to it. Thank you for time and chow as i will be deleting my account here. soon and have no intention in looking for anyone ellse.

Rbadmc

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

Hugz_n_Kissez
Someplace, Ontario Canada

Posted: Feb 1, 2008, 3:16 PM CST

Rbadmc wrote:

Just so you all know I have decided to leave my wife. As ther is nothing to mend here, i have given to much time now. I have told the other girl my intentions and i will leave it at that. she is the best friend I belive I want so only time will bring us together and i am so looking foreward to it. Thank you for time and chow as i will be deleting my account here. soon and have no intention in looking for anyone ellse.

Rbadmc

Good for you and Good Luck....

You deserve some peace of mind and to have someone who genuinely loves you....

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

justmechecking
Long Prairie, Minnesota USA

Posted: Feb 1, 2008, 4:29 PM CST

[quote=jbibiza]Don't use your son as an excuse to stay in a bad situation, the way the courts are today you won't loose your son, in fact if you can show that you are the more stable parent you may even get physical custody. Children learn about relationships by observing their parents, what are you and your wife teaching your son? Even if you think he doesn't know... he does, or he at least sees the lack of respect and affection you have for each other. This is a very unhealthy way to raise a child, shame on your wife for her past behavior and shame on you if you try to justify doing the same thing.

Stop the excuses and the justifications. An affair is so blatantly "black and white". There is nothing in the "grey" areas of life here.

You are suffering my friend, and you are hurting your son. When your son grows up some day and tolerates a dysfunctional relationship, just as you are doing now. When you look back and say the " coulda, shoulda, woulda's", it will be too late. You may have to watch your son make the same justifications that you have. And you will be reliving the same hurt and pain you do today in being witness to the way you have taught him to live.

The marriage WILL end, as soon as she finds the right man, the relationship is already gone, so what are you holding on to here? It may be your son, but there is more to the story, and there is no better time than right now to start coming to reality.

You are stronger than you think you are, just check it out.

justmechecking

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

Rbadmc
Princeton, British Columbia Canada

Posted: Feb 2, 2008, 8:56 AM CST

I must say this I am no cheater and nether is this lady, we will not be together until we clean our yards up first, but there is no reason we can’t talk as friends until then it is always nice to talk to someone special and she is all of that. She is no home wrecker.
It is nice to feel wanted though.

Thank you for taking the time to try and help, some were harsh, perhaps because they do not understand my writing, I will never know but again thank you for your time.

Rbadmc

Back to top

Is this post offensive? If so, Report this post »

Connecting Singles^® Forums100% Free Online Dating

Forums Nav

Forums