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Can you just brush it off your heart and from your mind ... and to be normal and happy persons?

Is it so hard ... to let it go?

Depends Koni...

For me it's been the norm for all my relationships to be like that..I have worked on the trust thing for some time now...and I feel I have made alot of progress...BUT it also stems from trust violations at a young age...So I'm at the point now where it's hard for me to balance...Either I can be too trusting or not trusting enough by times...Mostly it's the too trusting factor though now...It took me alot of years to get to this place though so I can understand why some people simply find it hard to trust...BUT that means they need to work on it!!!!!!!!

Not really....but hard.



Koni.

Koni..Your assuming there normal of course which is a mistake!!

As mad as a Russian bear with a thistle in its rectum.

Depends?! on what? ............. and why Oh Wise one ?

I am a glass is half full, happy go lucky generally optimistic person.. and I am forgiving.. but even I can't escape the fact that people don't always behave in a way that warrants respect and trust... trust and respect have to be earned...

I think in fact it is normal and healthy to hold a little back until you are sure of the other person... damage limitation

Trust is a sacred thing to me mainly because I haven't had alot of people in my life that I could trust...That's why I take such a hardline when it comes to people violating my trust!!!!!!!!

People with trust issues are mad? You don't sound very trusting either, by the way.

On the attitude of the offender.

Yes we should divest ourselves of resentment at the earliest oppurtunity, otherwise it becomes self destructive.

But to simply welcome them back into our lives with open arms? Nope...

Prudency surely dictates that we exercise caution...we 'test' the waters so to speak.

Does that make sense, or is it too cerebral?

I forget really fast when I have no other choice.

Exactly ... work on it! Not to keep it on a dusty shelves of our brains... because it will not solve the problem. But do take it out of ... kick it out. People who do fall in love with us ... Do deserve some trusting back as well. Don't you think so?

Yes they do...most certainly and that's where becoming the person first that you want to find comes in...If you want trust...you need to be a trustworthy and trustful person!!!!!!!!!

Read it properly again without jumping to conclusions!! I said there mad, i didn't say anything about trust.

I just said some are not normal.

I know who to trust and who's full of crap as well

Sorry Lush, I should have said .... "difficult" instead of HARD



That adjective it is for another thread about sex issues

By that I mean I am practical; I move on, and no, my new partner will not be paying the price of my past failures. I see him as a new person in my life, deserving of respect and the opportunity to show me who he is and what he feels for me.

oh yes, it certainly is very difficult to let your guard down, especially when you've already been the victim - on more than one occasion. i don't trust ANYONE until i've spent some time with them and they've convinced me that they're worthy.

A person who did it to poor Russian man ... an evil .... Just normal Evil

You can trust completely when you've finally decided you are loved completely, I think. Well, maybe not completely, but *fundamentally* (there's always some little secret or secrets that other people hold back, but you can still rely on them fundamentally if they love you).

Clearly! Good on you!