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You find other women. You leave them or they leave you. You do this over and over. Then you become so old that you can't live with anyone.

If you're going to get it together, get it together quick!

but, there one guy, took me few years to get over him, when i heard , he was getting married, i got more upset! now, i have move on!

but it goes with acceptance before you can move on and find other... or else you are stuck to it forever... jumping fromone relationship to another... and lost yourself totally.


I will be sorry for you then...

Babysteps..one step at a time..Babysteps

I think Robert has the right idea. Something to do while your mind wanders and figures things out. It is very therapeutic. Robert does bikes, I do needlework and crochet. Just something to do with the hands. JMO

dana

let my head lead over your heart...


we can talk ourselves into anything....

I know how hard this is. Still dealing with it myself since November. People say time heals all wounds and I think for the most part it does. There are some days though that feel like the breakup happened just yesterday! I guess you can only take one day at a time. Keep busy! That's what I have to do to keep my mind from wondering backwards.

From a total non-expert....
#1 - talk to yourself about it and try to understand whether this is for good, or temporary, and whether you have done everything you could to prevent it and let the person know how much you care and absolutely nothing has worked
#2 - remember what your hobbies are, maybe focus on an exciting project you've been putting off for a while for lack of time etc.
#3 - do remove everything that reminds you of her - this can be painful, e.g. deleting the photos, saved chats etc. from your computer (after you've saved them on a CD), but it will really help - "out of sight, out of mind"
#4 - focus on your future - analyze the mistakes you made (if any), analyze better who you are and what you really want; work on bettering yourself, physically and spiritually - gym, reading etc. (it helped me to read a couple of novels by my favourite authors that discussed human relationships, that put my mind at ease)

I'm sure I'm forgetting something, but this is my "formula" in a nutshell.... (there is no formula of course, but this seems to have helped me last time it happened)

you should come to ireland ah no seriously u will move on in time and she will be just a memory to u at the moment it looks as if u wont move on but lets face it the first thing u need to do is take a major look at urself in a mirror oh my god ur FINE!!! any girl would love to be with u so u have the pick of the bunch u will meet someone new and believe me she will be just as amazing and then ur x will realize what she lost and as for being friends yeah of course that can happen but she has to want that 2 im best friends with my x and if i can do that anyone can as not only is he my x but we were to get married!! so put that smile back on ur face!!!!

I don't know, brother. The last time it happened to me was 13 years ago, and I never got over it. Pathetic, isn't it?

The fact is that most people get over this kind of mindfuck a lot sooner. You're young. You'll probably be okay. Find another woman as soon as you can, even if you don't love her.

NOW that's not very good advice...A woman knows only to clearly when she is not loved...and if she has a back bone she won't settle for that...So UMMMMMMMMM no don't do that...Everyone deserves to have love and to be loved in return...that's what it's all about!!!!!!

Thank you I will try to stay busy and do my best at staying away from things that remind me of her until I can handle it.I just know that I feel lost and blah and I wish that feeling would go away.

I know about the whole crying alone thing and also at night thing.I have been there and right now I am there.

Ok I think I know the thing I am going to do.I am going to put all my time into my horses.Maybe that will help me.I hope.

Thanks for what you had to say and yeah about the Ireland thing.I was born there so I do visit there from time to time when I can afford.I like it there.I am thinking that I just need to move.To somewhere other then here.After what has happened in my life the last 5 months I need a fresh start.

I wont jump from woman to woman to fill a space.I want to have a woman in my life that I know I can get to know and love her.I believe in that.

At least you kind of know you're on the right track, with that kind of thinking. You're not being impulsive, you're actually trying to think about it.
Eventually, it will get better.

Everyone deals with heartbreak a little differently.
Try to hear what everyone is saying & see the idea behind it a bit more than just the suggestions.
:)

You need to find something to smile about each day... like that beautiful child of yours. One look in those eyes should be enough to keep you on track each day. You have to set the example in her life & joy is one of the most important lesson she needs to learn from her Daddy.
The actions of the past are just that, the past. Now you need to have new experiences, make new plans & move on. Try not to harbor grudges, make selfless gestures, say thank you to one person each day, really enjoy a favorite food... make each day count for something other than past mistakes.
:)

When you find yourself rattling around, thinking too much, get out of the house. Call a friend, have a cup of coffee on the steps, take your daughter to a toy shop... anything. Perhaps a date is too much to focus on, but friends are essential. They can remind you of the good memories instead of letting you linger on the hurtful ones.