Posted: Jun 10, 2008, 12:43 PM CST
three_333 wrote:Porn is one of the reasons that my last relationship failed. At least, I think so. He was addicted to porn! He couldn't go a week without looking at it, and I was never invited to these little "sessions" of his. Not that I would have accepted, mind you, because porn does absolutely nothing for me, but he didn't know that. But anyways, once I asked him what was on his mind when we were doing sexual things, and he named some famous pornstar. Hello, ouch! Yet, I continued my relationship with him, even attempting to lose a lot of weight in order to look like his "pornstar". (Stupid, I know.) But I think it can be a way of being unfaithful, and in my case, it was, because it wasn't me that he was fantasizing about. The fact that I was not as flexible, thin, and attractive as those girls is what tore our relationship apart.
I think it is being unfaithful... and I don't see it as entertainment. If a person in a commited, respectful, loving relationship feels the need to obtain satisfaction elsewhere, then the relationship is not working as it should, and all the time wasted jerking off or fingering in front of a computer screen should be better put to good use by going to therapy and addressing those issues, instead of pretending that nothing is going on.
And hun, three 333, I don't think that not being flexible, thin and attractive as the girls in the porn movies is what tore your relationship apart. I believe you were not flexible, thin or attractive AS those girls when you started a romantic relationship with him... so he found you attractive enough and appealing enough to be in a relatiosnhip with you.
Maybe you were not feeling secure enough about yourself, and that insecurity is what pushed him away. In my experience, my insecurities have been by far the heaviest issues in any of my relationships... not the weight, or being unattractive, but being insecure is what pushed men away. They can't deal with other peoples insecurities and most of them are not willing to help you through with it...
Be happy about you, you are very pretty and the right man will see it.
JMHO
OH! AND IT STILL FEELS LIKE CHEATING...