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sorry no huggie emoticons for you.

You'll never the truth about what was going on in his relationship -- he surely wasn't the only unhappy one in his home. Maybe she was cheating too, you don't know. One thing is for certain, if his marriage wasn't broken in the first place, he wouldn't have been with you. Plain and simple.

You were in a relationship between two consenting adults -- no one has the right to judge you. Stop beating yourself up, you can't go back and change it now. You obviously got what you needed from it at that time. My only concern is that you had to share your toys -- something you probably won't want to do again.

Havent figured out what i did wrong to deserve what she did but she was someone i knew for years and knew we had a baby. I think that if he is bored then she has an easy way in.

Hey no respect lost here........

I agree.....

Too much Bullsh!t and people start beleive their own lies.....

Keep it real..

You did nothing to deserve that...there is no exscuse...if he was that bored...unhappy...sad...mad...unsatisfied...then he should have had the guts to tell you...worked on your marriage....NOT another woman or left...Only cowards turn to another woman while still in a relationship...out of nothing other than plain selfishness....

I personally would never get involved with anyone who was married or in a relationship if i had that knowledge of such situation

Me neither...I respect other people's relationships and all married...or attached men are off limits for me..always have been and I can't see hurting another woman like that!!!!!!!!

Which is selfish...to cheat? To leave a relationship that's not working? To stay in a relationship that's not working? At what point is it ok to want to be happy? If someone feels trapped, what is the honorable thing to do -- stay and force yourself to love someone when you don't? I don't believe that you are doing any favors to your partner/spouse if you stay in a relationship that isn't working. Don't they deserve better too? I don't believe that cheating is right...but sometimes it is very human.

after 4 yrs he has finally appologized to me for what he did to me

Hey i had an affair with a married man and ended up marrying him myself. Ended up with somebody else's asshole.Karma is a bitch..

Cheating is selfish...I don't advocate staying...I advocate working it out or getting out of it....How hard is that?????

How fair is it for your partner to think you do love them and for you to stay and pretend while you get some on the side?????


I don't think cheating is human..It's cowardly....

I would have to say to cheat is more selfish cause it puts the everyone involved at risk for many things. I is better to seperate to not shame the one who isn't doing wrong

so,

because you have a right to be happy, is it then ok to devastate someone else to do it?

To me, this is like saying: "i have a right to live a good life, so i am going to rob a bank".

Everyone should strive to be happy, but they should do it wihin some set of moral rules. One of them is honesty and integrity:
If you are not happy with your relationship and you are convienced you cannot work it out, get out of it. That might hurt the other person, but at least it is moral.

thank you I have to agree 100%

What you said.

Yeah it is.

So here is the problem.....we are raised with the notion (however outdated) that marriage is forever. We strive to find our soul mates and then have the perfect wedding -- hell, prom is the practice party. We get married and have 2.5 children, then realize maybe it's not all the Brady Bunch promised us it would be. But...marriage is forever isn't it? Divorce carries social stigma, financial consequences, loss of children, home, security, etc. An affair is easy, available....with the only consequences being emotional. I'm not saying it's right, I'm saying it's easier. Then we're surprised when it happens! We blame the mistresses or the other men involved...everyone but ourselves. Of course it's cowardly. Of course it's immoral. But so is our society. Our marriages are only a reflection of that.

End the relationship BEFORE you start getting the root from somewhere else.

It's called respect.

It's called morals.

Goose! I didn't know you go for married men......