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I'll just post the same thing she posted on Yahoo Answers hopefully you'll have better advice. I tried to help her but don't know what to do.

"It all started back when i was a Junior in H.S. I was going out w/ my bf Alan for about a year and when my mom started her new job there was this Kid that worked w/ her named Joe. He started coming by after work and staying till around 2 in the morning. My and My Bf were go through some hard patches and i was really intriqued by Joe. There was some flirtation going on and he was really nice. I was about to leave my bf for him but someone really close to my bf died so i couldn't possibly do that so i stuck it out w/ him. and Joe ended up going into the Coast Guard and was gone for months and then moved away. He came back and i was still going out w/ my bf he came over x-mas eve we made cookies, then on v-day I got a text message from him saying that he wanted to be w/ me and my bf didn't treat me right and he'd treat me better. I told him he couldn't be serious, wanting me now and living 2 states away. After that I don't think i talked to him for another year when he showed up at my house, then we found out we were both going to the Patriots game and he said he wanted to hang out w/ me and my bf there and he had no interest in me. But now I'm a freshman in college and he came to my house last night; he was really flirty he came by cuz i asked him for a favor he left then he came back just to visit. He did silly things like stealing my remote and trying to get me to fight him for it, but with me having a bf i didn't fall for it. Then i overheard him talking to me step-father and Joe was saying whats the big deal i'm only 4 years older than her, and stuff like that. I have always been attracted to him because he is going places he had dreams and goals where as my boy friend doesn't. And no matter how long he's gone as soon as he is back in my life i'm attracted to him. Now summers hear and he's back in town and struggling my feeling for both. I know i love my bf more. But there is just this curiosity about this guy that I have been fighting for a couple years now.
I've only had sex with my bf and he's the only real relationship i've been in. We've been together for 3 1/2 years but it seems like its all i know..I've been w/ my bf since i was 15 and now i'm 19 so it's like i'm curious. I don't wanna sound like a whore or anything. Now that Joe is around it makes me extremly tempted and i don't like that cuz i'm not a cheater; but i have a feeling if i ever did leave my bf for this guy it wouldn't last long and i just threw a almost 4 year relationship down the toilet. Joe has always gone out of his way to help me. I needed a inspection sticker but my car was a piece of crap but he found a way to get it for me anyways. Am i totally ridiculous for having these feelings?"

She lives In Mass and she is really confused talked to her on the phone for hours today..

Lena

To give my opinion, and it is only that. I would say if I were in your shoes I would not give up or risk what I feel for my bf, for somthing that is only curiosity. If you feel more then that for the other guy that makes a little diferent.
But not by much. Take one word of advice from some one who learned the hard way. You really don't know what you have until you loose it.

Thanks, thats the best answer she's gotten all day read some of them on Yahoo Answers and they were awful..
And I'm in no position to give love advice. But i figured you guys have more life experience.

Well given that your very young and started to date young...maybe taking time off from your relationship to date other people is not a bad idea....That gives you time to explore your feelings and decide decide from there....If you were older I would say no...BUT you're too young to settle yourself down with just one person....

Hugs does have some good suggestions there! It is a hard call really I guess it boils down to how strong your feelings are for the bf.
I would not take a chance on loosing someone you feel very strongly about. But if you don't feel that strongly I agree with Hugs completely.

Good advice.

Your turning out to be alright, after all.

Yeah well you won't say that once ya get to know me better!!!!!!!!!

Hehe..

I love that little guy.

Yepster

Yeah I agree it all comes down to WHAT she feels for her boyfriend... if she genuinely loves him and sees a future with him.. then no.. definitely not worth it.. she sounds like a genuinely nice girl as well.. so I imagine if she did stray it would eat her up.. definitely not worth that.. JMO

I would have to agree with Aries and Try on this one having learned the hard way myself many many eons ago....

Hiya Sol... long time no see.. how r ya doing???

This is JMO, but....

I think what she really needs to do is step out of the picture and look at it from all perspectives. Apparently this Joe guy does like her, and seems to have his life together. This guy that she's been dating seems to have no goals for himself except to date her for the rest of his life. She needs to do what's best for her. She needs to decide what she wants in life in general, and then go from there.

Fortunately, but unfortunately I know how she feels. I've been there myself. I've regretted never exploring the relationship. We're still friends to this day and he's been married now for I think somewhere around 15 years. We still ask each other what might have happened if we had ever had a relationship, but neither of us really know. I just know that it just wasn't meant to happen for what ever reason.

Tell her not to agonize over it...Write it down, look at the pros and cons of it all with each on separately and don't combine the two guys or compare them to one another. Tell her to look at it as though she has an interest in each of them and they have both asked her out and now she has to make a decision on which one she wants to go out with. Leave out the feelings and the current/past relationship, looking at it as a new venture into unknown territory.

I am doing okay....I really am just been busy a lot lately. How have you been? Email me.

Answered it yourself!

Is late now .... but will do

exactly, and if you have real feelings for your bf then why risk it.
And you have to remember this other guy there is nothing saying that once he wins over that is not all he wanted.

Thanks You guys!! I knew you guys would be great answer givers..

I will be sure to tell her..

You guys are the best

Love you

You are not being ridiculous at all. You are young and have only been with this one boy. I may be older than your mother, but I can remember being your age. You've already made your decision whether you know it or not! You've said you dated your boyfriend for 4 years. He doesn't treat you the way you would like to be treated, it doesn't seem as though you really enjoy being with him, it's a habit. You're afraid of throwing away a 4-year relationship. This is not a relationship. Is this all you want for yourself for the rest of your life? Trust me when I say, you will not be the same person when you are 30 as you were when you were 15 and met this boy. You've aleady noticed that Joe has dreams and goals. Are they also dreams you have? How about your boyfried? I'll bet he's never shared with you what he wants to be when he grows up! Life is so short, think for yourself. You are not happy now, so what would be so terrible if you took the chance and found out Joe doesn't make you happy either? It just puts you closer to what will make you happy. Never settle!! Stay in college and work hard for your degree, make friends, smile alot (especially when you don't feel like it!). Concentrate on you. What do you bring to others? Always remember, if a guy tries to hold you back or is not encouraging you to be you, he's not in love with you. I wish you happiness and big dreams!

This may not be the best place to ack for advice

For some reason we are all single here!

So we must have done something wrong along the way