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Mf, you never did tell us, if the culprits are male or female.




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I bet you do

This exchange should be X rated!

1 US Dollar = 315.250 Comoros Franc

Ha ha

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byDiILrNbM4




Detachable Penis, by King Missile


I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.

[ background singing begins:
"detachable penis" over and over ]

This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think
it's gonna get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out, when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.

So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
and I really hate having to sit down
every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue
towards St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books
and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I
talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get
it permanently attached,
but I don't know.
Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.

jeesh, they can have it, not like it's doing me any good these day.

I am glad they stole 2 inches of it. I got tired of it hanging out of my shorts, and it was a real biatch tying to my leg. When it got hard, the knot was too tight to undo.

Keep dreaming?

um, you too

The Herald, Zimbabwe Nov. 15, 1999
" A Mbare man who thought he could get away with refusing to pay a prostitute for services rendered will forever rue his decision after the prostitute cast a spell which resulted in him losing his private organs on Saturday.
Police confirm the disappearance of the man's private parts yesterday. The man, who recovered his parts yesterday morning after paying his dues, had spent the greater part of Friday night with the woman before he slipped from her lodgings on the pretext that he was going to the toilet, which was several metres away.
Unfortunately, his trick back-fired when he woke to find his private parts missing the following morning. Fearing his wife;s reaction and desperate to confirm that the parts were, indeed, missing, he went to the nearby Mbare Musika toilet, where, on confirming the parts disappearance, he ran around the crowded terminus screaming and clutching his groin.
Police officers took him to their post, where the prostitute was summoned after he narrated his problem. Although denying that she had cast a spell on him, the prostitute, in the presence of the man's wife, told the officers that she could solve the problem if he apologized and paid for services rendered, plus interest. As part of the punishment she said the parts would, however, return to him the following day.
:The man was here this morning to confirm that his parts were back. It is really embarrassing for a married man to have to go through this experience for a small sum of $60, said one officer at Mbare Musika police post.
There was the Khartoum Penis Panic in 2003. $0 men were hospitalized after having their penises 'stolen' by a mysterious West African.
The shrinking penis panic that swept through Khartoum was the latest outbreak of KORO, a psychiatric disorder that cause, it is believed, men to believe their penises, (or more rarely women to believe their labia) have shrunk into their bodied or that witches have stolen them.
This would make a hell of a comedy in a movie.

Maybe they have cock fights with them

The Khartoum Panic of 2003 typifies how mass KORO epidemics occur. Hospitals and police stations become clogged with dozens of people all reporting the magical theft of their penises. For weeks the streets had been alive with rumours of a mysterious West African, sometimes called 'Satan's Friend' at other times a Zionist troublemaker, who was causing men's penises to disappear after shaking their hands. In September, a local newspaper printed the story of the merchant's vanishing manhood; this seemed to raise the levels of panic, because afterwards the hospitals were flooded with dozens of hysterical men claiming that their penises had been stolen.
Doctors couldn't find a single case of a missing organ and proclaimed this illness to be psychosomatic---but this did not stop the local police from rounding up some 50 unfortunate foreigners on suspicion of practicing sorcery. The panic continued for several more days with one newspaper reporting that, "The situation has reached the point where a wife accompanying her husband to the front door at home bids him farewell by saying "Be careful not to shake with men, but you can shake the girls' hands as much as you want." As with most KORO panics, after a couple of weeks the hysteria died down in Khartoum and the surrounding ares leaving the Sudanese authorities bemused as to its origin. In fact what had happened in Khartoum was just another part of a general wave of KORO hysteria that had been sweeping central and west Africa for over a decade; close to two actually. The first traceable outbreak occured in Nigeria back in 1990 with penises being stolen all over Lagos. Three suspects were arrested and hung. A larger panic ensued there , then spread country wide in 1996, followed by an outbreak in Cameroon, spread through Togo, Ghana, Ivory Coast, Senegal and Gambia. Violent riots occured in each country and dozens of alleged witches and suspect helpers were lynched. One incident in Nigeria in 2001 resulted in the deaths of eight Christian evangelists by being burned to death for stealing penises...another in Ghana caused 12 deaths...this also has spread to various parts of Asia which saw its first case as early as 1967 in China, Hong Kong and even areas in India...Could it spread to the US...keep a watch on any reports of stolen or shrunken penises...would any news show dare report it as that would be during the 'family hour'...%D (make johnny and Mary, or Tashiba and Tyrone leave the room...)

There is a gang of goth women that do it to. Here at home! Beware!

Just as a sideline comedy with/ about stolen and shrunken penises there is an artist in Queensland named Tim Patch that has a rather unique talent. He does painting with his 'magical' penis. Granted that his use of this somewhat unorthodox brush, his latest efforts are portraits of former Australian PM John Howard and Kim Beazley. Patch reports his family's reaction to his new art direction: "My dad is not too impresses. He shook his head and said: ' Oh dear, oh dear.' Then told a friend I could paint with me dick and she was really enthusiastic." Photos may be available of both his art and 'brush'.
In due reference to my posts just above, it has occurred to me that in lieu of all the missing, stolen and shrunken penises around Africa, and on occasion, in Asia, that perhaps a group of these 'victims' could/ should form a sort of glee-club' and tour the world with songs about their predicament of having had their penises stolen by witches who use sorcery. One song comes immediately to mind is 'My Penis Lies Over the Ocean' as in My Bonnie lies over the ocean fame; can you just hear a singing group singing away, 'Bring back....bring back my penis to me...to me...A lot of current and past songs could provide a plethora of penis songs by simply re- working the titles and a few lines....it could spark a new musical rage; Penis Songs....it may even be therapeutic for all those African and Asian males that suddenly discover theirs have been stolen and/ or shrunken; maybe women could also be persuaded to give voice to their lamentations of their missing penises of their men....try it on some song titles....Ten Little Penises instead of Ten Little Indians....100 Penises on the Wall instead of the beer bottles...16 Penises instead of 16 Candles...etc. etc.

sounds good, saves on bristle brushes

Kenyan arrests for 'witch' deaths

"Nineteen people have been arrested in Kenya in connection with the burning of 11 people accused of being witches.

A police spokesman told the BBC that those arrested may not have been involved in the killings but possibly incited the attacks.

Eight women and three men, aged between 80 and 96, were burned to death in the western Kisii district on Wednesday.

A security operation was launched to hunt down the villagers involved. The area is now reported to be calm.

The Kisii district has witnessed similar attacks in the past when people suspected of engaging in witchcraft have been killed or ostracised.

But our reporter says that this is a surprisingly large number of people to be attacked at the same time.

Deputy police spokesman Charles Owino told the BBC:

"You may find that they could not have been involved directly in the killing, but if you have evidence that they were involved in war cries, then they will have another offence of inciting," he said.

He said those proven to have been involved in the attack would be charged with murder.

The police are guarding against revenge attacks, the police spokesman said.

'Witches meeting'

The BBC's Muliro Telewa in the region says the gang had a list of the victims and picked them out individually.

The mob dragged them out of their houses and burned them individually and then set their homes alight, our correspondent says.

Residents have been ambivalent about condemning the attacks because belief in witchcraft is widespread in the area, he says.

But local official Mwangi Ngunyi spoke out against the murders.

"People must not take the law into their own hands simply because they suspect someone," he told AFP news agency.

Villagers told reporters that they had evidence that the victims were witches.

They say they found an exercise book at a local primary school that contained the minutes of a "witches' meeting" which detailed who was going to be bewitched next.

The victim's families are in hiding, fearing for their lives. "

Just came across this on BBC

My question would be about how he discovered this unique talent of painting by penis.