Posted: Apr 25, 2008, 7:11 AM CST
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute,
but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of
his life.
War doesn't determine who's right. War determines
who's left.
It's your God. They're your rules. *You* go to hell.
I once prayed to God for a bike, but quickly found out
he didn't work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed
for his forgiveness.
If you think can't get worse it's probably only
because you lack sufficient imagination.
If my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCALATOR =
EVERLASTING FUN
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us
to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit
down and shut up.
Heart Attacks...God's revenge for eating His animal
friends.
Guys...just because you have one, doesn't mean you
have to be one.
If you can read this...I can slam on my brakes and sue
you.
Try not to let your mind wander....It is too small and
fragile to be out by itself.
The object of war is not to die for your country, but
to make the other bastard die for his.
If practice makes perfect & nobody's perfect, why
practice?
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match
for me at kick boxing.
"Computer games don' t effect kids; I mean if Pac-Man
affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in a
darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music."
Thanks to harleylvr.