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my mom said i was a slut when i was 4??

many years til i understood the impact of that

she said i was unloveable and no one would ever love me



that bit of misinformation polluted the truth and my beliefs for a long time...
oh well






turns out when i was 13 she was found to be schizophrenic-
i try to take that into consideration

my parents words still have a negative effect on my life, no matter how hard I try to dispell them!! My parent's words and my foster parents actions!!

I love me mom in every way

That is always comforting to hear!!

why do I get the feeling you are thinking dirty

Only from you Ship

No....my reputation preceeds me


I meant that sincerely...there are so many horror stories about parents...it was nice to see there is still love out there!!

Ship: I know you didn't get what you expected from this thread but it sure as hell was theraputic for me. I dislike my mother immensely, she can find fault with everything or anything I do. She is plain poison and my friends have seen that. My brother lives home (49) and doesn't help her or pay rent and I am asked to do everything from scraping the shed and painting it or painting the basement or cleaning or whatever and when I ask why can't my brother do it --she says "well he has to go fishing today" or " he always says he doesn't have time". My parents hav been dvorced for 25 years and she will not speak to me for a while-- still when she knows I was there or we have spoken. I hav always been called "tubby' by her and was told when I was getting marred a second time that she would refuse me for a daughter-in-law because I never had the guts to make the first one work. The positive part is ---I love my Father and my stepmother.

I have to stop rushing my typing and start looking for my typos. Sorry.

I know I never got along with my mother and we faught all the time but I would love to have her back again in my life if only I could. When she died I had wished that it was my dad and not my mom.

I am afraid of my Mother dying because of all the hateful thoughts I have and I know I wil be sorry for it. I already am sorry I have these thoughts.

When I was a teenager I was a bit wild and one time I forged one of my mums cheques.. small amount ($5) but still VERY bad thing to do... her response to my getting caught had a profound effect on me... her main issue was disappointment at what I had done and the fact that she did not raise me that way.. and that cut like a knife... was alot harsher that grounding me or whatever.. plus she forgave me and gave me the money to go and visit my brother, which I had planned to do for the Summer... being so merciful and gracious and emphasising the importance of trust really impressed on me what a wonderful mum I have... I never did anything like that again after that, and our relationship changed for the better...

Hiya Ship

all is well with the typing.

So sorry that parents are so mean. I was in therapy once when a woman told the rest of us, she "brought him into this world, I can take him out"! That infuriated me so much, it was all I could not not to take her out. I was told never to come back.


But it was alright for her to threaten her kid!!

Mental illness.. soo cruel, it must be hard to come to terms with because even though it is her mental illness and not her it still hurts, cause we all have a certain expectation of how life/people should be....

Still though... it is often the very BEST of people who suffer like this and have to deal with adversity....

At a recent healing meeting, we had a testimony from one of the members telling us how his mum was cured on Schizophrenia by attending church... she is perfect now apparently... the member was beaten and verbally abused by his mum growing up.. quite hard to believe I know but apparently true..

Hiya sweetie

She said to me,never pay for the guys when you going out.....

good lord !!

Its true some memories can only maybe fade a bit but never really go away.

My mum is an evil bitch.

Don't hold back....say how you REALLY feel!!

My mum is so old that she was seating next to Jesus in the first class

haha that is holding back.