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Just to repeat myself, because when I said this before, it was again pushed away from the topic and covered up..


This topic has been resurrected so many times but is still good to remind people!
Many keep saying it is just normal for the net. That may be.. but it don't make it right.
If you read most profiles, they say they are looking for long term or marriage, want someone honest who don't play mind games and so on.
Then in their own profile, they have a picture of when they were 80 pounds lighter and 10 years younger and most of what they tell you is crap!

This makes it so difficult to find a rose in the midst of all of the weeds!
All I can say is..... If anyone is looking for a serious relationship, they wont start it all out with lies!!
Just be honest and let the real thing find you.
If it is based on lies and a fantasy world.. Well.. it comes right back to them.

Then wonder why they are here looking for years
In the long run, be yourself and be honest.
To hell with the rest!
If this offends those who lie--- too damn bad.. try the truth!

:gasp: Someone is presenting themselves falsely on the internet! Say it ain't so!

Please, it comes with the territory, you just have to be cautious. What I don't understand is how people can get so bent over someone they've only chatted with online. Can you really be so hurt that all your hopes and dreams are destroyed because a total stranger lied to you? I don't like liars either, but they're all over, I just shrug it off.

You know, when I joined this site, I truly was looking for a relationship.

After three years, I found out that there were many fakes and people just here for entertainment and getting their jollies.

Now I've changed my profile, deleting my pictures and stating that I have given up.

If someone has been "here looking for years", it doesn't mean they are FAKE

Well I can say I am a honest person, my pictures on here are a year old now. And took with my webcam unfortunately. If they had asked my weight I would have included it.
I myself have nothing to be ashamed of, I am a few pounds over the weight I should be to have clothing fit right. Cause all my weight is in my waist area. When men meet me , they always say I am as I described myself. And that I was skinnier than they thought. I usually find men who have lied about having a few extra pounds, when in fact it's 100 or more pounds.
Most of the time they lie about the things they do regularly, when in fact it was things they did when they were in their 20's. They also lie about work and money, just to make theirself look like more of a catch.

to keep nosy private detectives at bay .... he he he he he ..

ok, ... what if due to certain circumstances as regards work or status, .. one cannot reveal his/her true identity and is willing to do so as soon as he/she can trust a friendship that is formed online ? ....

would it still be wrong if it is not deliberately done for the purposes of fraud or deceit ?

A lie is a lie, deciet is still deciet. I can make a lot of excuses to do a variety of things from drinking to not taking care of my kids. just because I have a "good excuse" not to do something doesnt make it right, or just. Its still wrong....

So?

The net is just for the fun of it....don't believe one is capable of landing a partner without having met face to face yet.

If it is someone that you've been chatting to and then find out it not the person u wanted it to be.....fine, have adrink, shake hands and say goodbye....

What's all the fuss about people lying on the nety about themselves? It's part of the package.

I don't...I am confortable with what I see in the mirror, others may not be. Should we therefore not allow them the chance to come on line? That is what we're saying here.

So long as it makes the person happy....it don't bother me.

ok, it'll be fine then if Chelsea Clinton (he he he) .. came on here with her profile picture and all info intact i guess ... lol .. or one of George Bush's daughters ...

they'd probably land Osama Bin Laden as a boyfriend in that case.

that was just an illustration ... lol (no offense) ... but many people have valid reasons for keeping all the truth away from dating sites until they can trust someone enough. you can't keep them away for that reason, .. as long as they don't have ill-intentions.

Finally, a voice of reason.

I don't see the point in lying about oneself, I don't, but I don't understand a lot of things other people do. That's just how some people get their jollies, f**king with people. It's not nice, but it's not the end of the world.

Not the end of the world for me either, but I don't have to play along either.
I just act a fool most of the time, if my acting silly makes someone smile, I have done well!
I work hard and play hard.
But I have both feet on the ground. And I have nothing to be ashamed of.
Either people like me for what I really am or they don't.
Their loss if the latter!

But I still say... How can anyone be serious about finding a partner if it is based on lies and deceit?

Well because of all the fakes and game players on here...I just take it that all are playing games and trust none...that could be one reason why the fakes ruin it for people...I'm tired of trying to weed out the honest from the dishonest and find it easier to heir on the side of caution and refuse to get to know anyone!!!!!!!!!!!

It didn't used to be like that for me...but I refuse to waste my time anymore period!!!!!!!!!


That's one consequence I guess of fake profiles for people......

I think the length of time here is irrelevant ...... people have come and gone and returned many times ..... but from my own experiences I'm sticking close to home ..... if I can meet someone fairly shortly - in the long run its always better. I've done the long-distance thing and am not inclined to go that route again as people are not always as their appear. Thus - if and when I find someone - I'd love to spend a lot of time getting to know them in person.

[quote=rasgumby]Not the end of the world for me either, but I don't have to play along either.
I just act a fool most of the time, if my acting silly makes someone smile, I have done well!
I work hard and play hard.
But I have both feet on the ground. And I have nothing to be ashamed of.
Either people like me for what I really am or they don't.
Their loss if the latter!

But I still say... How can anyone be serious about finding a partner if it is based on lies and deceit?[/quote]Because, my dear gumby, plain and simple, they aren't serious about finding a partner. They're just here to mess around with folks, it's how they get off or something.
I'm not talking about the ones who post pics where they're 10 yrs younger or 100 lbs heavier than they are now, that's just wishful thinking, that maybe you'll fall in love with them and not care.
I'm talking about the players that just mess around with everyone, chatting online and getting things serious sounding when they're really just full of it. Or the married ones that just want a good time.
That's why they lie, they just like to hurt others, or they don't care if they do. This hasn't happened to me, everyone I've met was pretty much as they presented themselves. But I've heard too many stories not to be cautious about anyone I meet, you never know till you get to know them if they're even real.

G'morning all.....just gone half eight am here.....

quick note that came to mind.....


It's all about psycohology isn't it?

A lot of people seem to have problems with feeling at ease with themselves and thier surrounding. Know fact, not only here, but in real life too I guess.

Therefore they create a cyber image of themselves, that which they would like to be, and that which they want others to believe they are.

Althou it may cause probelms for others who are here, however, that is one of the most common on line factors that exist, cyber personalities, i.e. people whjo on line are acting out an image, whereas in real life they are totally different persons.

Accepting that as being 'normal', one therefore ventures into these territories with an eye open. You are even warned on every page here on CS, beware, beware, beware. In other words, no, you really cannot trust fully anybody on here unlessyou have met them personally and can vouch for them. Always retain that 'if' as a safety limit.

Other then that, enjoy, I have, and I have also met some wonderful honest people who I am now in contact with along the way.

Would you care to elaborate on that? I'm Kenyan and rather interested to know what you mean exactly.

I think that makes a lot of sense. I should see things, like you do. Very wise!

absolutely I agree...it would be a matter of basic caution that a girl not say anything that will indicate her whereabouts... until she knows and is more confident with the person..... if she lied and totally elaborated though I would be a little suspect however.. JMV

Hi
Well-said, you have a very good and positive attitude. I believe if a person prefer to lie about everything then he/she will have to continue to lies for the rest of the life. Can long term relationship or marriage survive through lies? Everybody know the answer I am sure!

In this wonderful Universe, we attract what we are most of the times. If we are sincere and honest, people who are attracted to us would likewise be the same too. I have total faith in the forces of the Universe bringing people of like-mindedness or levels together most of the times. Just surrender yourself, there is no need to look hard for anything you seek. In life, it's like chasing the butterfy, the more you chase the farther it will fly away from you.

Have a great weekend

Hi,
Great advice. Being cautious is being prudent and wise, otherwise one should just relax and enjoy this site while waiting for the Mr Right/Miss Right to surface in due course.

Regards