Posted: May 17, 2008, 11:37 AM CST
The story of the blonde, the redhead and the brunette.
It was a lovely afternoon and three friends met for coffee and cake in a pleasant outdoor café. “What party do you think will win the election and move into the white house?” asked the blue eyed blonde.
“The three little pigs,” answered the brunette with confidence.
“Am I missing something?” asked the redhead irritably. “Should you judge people by what they look like?”
“Who will answer honestly?” the brunette responded with a shrug of the shoulders. Everyone sighed and stirred their coffee.
“It just does not end,” said the blonde. “Was Hillary really snipped?”
“California says yes,” replied the redhead with confidence.
“Only in America,” nodded the blonde.
All three sipped their coffee thoughtfully and looked up at the gathering clouds.
“I’ve been getting occult messages,” whispered the brunette, nodding knowingly. “After 20 years….”
“Yes?” chimed the other two.
“Sorry folks, I need to clear this up, but some might find this funny.”
“Here’s how you can do it,” cried the redhead helpfully. “Do you measure…..”
“Human growth hormone?” said the blonde, interrupting.
“Help needed, please,” cried the brunette, frustrated. “I need someone to talk to.”
“Let go, let God,” said the redhead in soothing tones.
“I have an observation,” said the blonde knowingly. “A Chinese doctor or perhaps a salesman…”
“Not another new guy,” complained the brunette. “Seriously, I don’t do this often.”
“The doctor is in,” said the redhead encouragingly.
“Dr. Smith,” the blonde nodded, smiling.
“He’s a surgeon,” protested the brunette.
Just at that moment, the waiter walked past carrying a plate of fruit.
“Strawberries!” cried out the three friends in unison. “Really cool.”
“Have you read The Diary of a House Husband,” asked the redhead.
“Not yet,” said the blonde, but I just finished The Obedient Wife. It’s all about odd things you have thought while having sex.”
“SEX,” chimed in all three.
“I’m curious,” said the blonde. “If you got pregnant by a green out of space alien, would you keep the baby?”
“Baby?”, said the redhead.
“What do ya think?” moaned the brunette. “This day last year….” The others leaned in to hear as a huge lorry rumbled past, and much of what was said was buried under the roar of the engine. “So, the moral of the story,” ended the brunette, “is that my dog is obsessed!”
“Why are people so stupid? asked the blonde sarcastically.
“Did someone….hunt for Osama Bin Laden?” asked the redhead, wiping chocolate frosting away with a crisp white napkin.
“John O’Rielly,” answered the blond knowingly.
“He has a slight problem,” said the brunette.
The clouds were gathering quickly now, and the three friends began to gather their belongings and prepare to make a dash for the tram. “Why do you think men, like O’Rielly, I mean,” queried the redhead, “are not allowed to write advice columns.”
“I don’t know,” said the brunette, heading toward the tram stop. “Try call 1-800-CALL-A-DIC.”
The three older women who would have sex with younger men if the chance arose, hopped on the tram just as it pulled up and as the sky exploded in an impressive, scary, and breathtaking storm.