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That's because we want definition; men want plurality, adventure, and sensation.

Yes - and a man can get plurality, adventure and sensation all from one woman!...................................


PROVIDED she's just a little mental, great fun to be with, owns her own large wardrobe of schoolgirl, nurse etc 'uniforms', likes to occasionally have a crack at 'ye olde whip', and has several very cute split personalities!

Hang in there brother, you're swingin pretty good right now!

one thing i dont understand,
are you awaiting for a specific man to answer this question?
maybe a specific kind of man?
Cuz, you know, there is no uniform answer to your question here...

Men, are human beings with very human character traits too!
In the end, it all comes down to what kind of person each one of us is and what we are looking for in our lives.

Along the same lines comes also how we men view our (potential) relationships. Many of my friends believe that getting into a serious long term relationship before the age of 30-35 doesnt agree with their lifestyles.
Some of them opt for no relationship at all (minority - actually i just know 2 persons like that) while others go for the short term various relationships so that they will have someone in their lives that wont be very demanding (it goes without saying that she would be easy to dispose of IF she gets very "demanding").
The latter banch of men will usually go after the pretty, sexy girls and they will generally not spend much time getting to know them before they make their move. And of course, they will never warn the girl beforehand that they are only looking for something to fill in their spare time.
And a lil footnote here: It doesnt mean that these persons cannot end up totally falling for a girl and ending up marrying her... but that's not the plan...

There are also people who managed to kind of figure out their lives at that age and are looking for a more permanent relationship, their mate. And there are others who dont even know what they are looking for, they think they are looking for one thing when they are not ready for it or are incapable of it at the time...

Pretty broad subject you oppened up Aundry's, no wonder the guys fled from it, hahaha. Just a general rule of thump for you though (and it but my very humble oppinion):
The guys that are looking for a long term relationship and know what they want, will generally put a lot more time into getting to know you before they initiate something. But then of course, this has it's own flaws in its principle....

You just cant win, can you?

I was married most of that time, but i know what you mean.
I work with a couple guys who try to bang every women they meet.
I also work with a few women who do the same thing.

Most of these people are annoying, and seem immature to me.

It's just the way some people are.

I know here in my town.. a lot of the men who were 'It' in their day.. tend to hang around with the younger girls.. 18-25..

It makes me laugh to see them really.. CLINGING to their youth.. when actually they look sad old wannabes..

imo of course haha

Ha ha Thats what I was thinking..

Woooo Thats a book Mano,but you know your......Spot on..

He's good isn't he..

My nephew is 20 and he attends vocational school and works and lives at home.....my sister has caught 3 different girls sneaking into his bedroom late at night.... he swears he did not invite these girls over.

he is a young man and did not refuse them entry

my sister is thinking of making him live in the basement.... basement windows do not open...



my point being this question is not a gender specific issue.

well, that was as sexist as his remark.
I am not all men. The problem with me, is that I do like being in a relationship. With the right woman of course. I am a romantic and passionate person. I always liked making love. I feel sex without the emotional attachment is empty. I would rather please myself and fall asleep alone.
I guess what I am saying is, that everyone is an individual. I myself aam not afraid of commitment. I find it creates a bond deeper than a romp in the hay.

Everyone to their opinion.

I think I love you. And rusty and mano. Anyone want to move to AL?

I missed most of the 20-30 thing due to being with someone for 13 years.......


So, I'll cough up and give an honest on escape from relationship rundown instead?!

Split 6 years 5 months ago, found all mates had done the thing i'd done, moved away, got hitched ect ect, signed up on a site......... Can't mention the name obviouslly, after 2 months was getting on quite well with someone, went for the weekend away thing as you do, got in as much jiggy as possible, which is kinda compulsory yeah? anyho, come Sunday lunchtime she drops a bombshell..... Needs to get going as boyfriend is due home that night!!!!!! First I'd heard of the dude!

That kinda ended that pretty sharpish.......

It did open my eyes to the possibility that things where a whole lot easier in the pulling stakes than I could of imagined!

anyway, cutting a long story shortish, I kinda went through 18 months of lining them up, doing the bumping uglys and then on to the next, yeah yeah yeah durty fecking dog! Looking back I was in full sweetshop syndrome!!

After 18 months ish.... met someone different! she could squeeze the last micron of juice outta a glass bottle if you get my drift..... Fell for her..... looking back another mistake as she was, hmmmmmm lets just say her marriage had been abusive, she'd been raped at 17 and every 2 months she needed to escape... only to be writing again a couple of weeks later and wanting back... < SNIP> cutting through a bit more waffle this went on for a year till I was at my wits end and we finally said NO MORE! needing some more light relief, I kinda jumped back into sweetie shop mode again, easy enough to do... another 3 months and a few more encounters and I met someone else that was for lack of a better word durty as hell and loved the ol horizontal tango as much as me.....

Was with for 8 months..... Ended when I found out that while I wasn't able to make it up there for the weekend... 256.6 mile drive.... She was entertaining all sorts..... so, the thing that I had been kinda doing was being done to me, trouble was I'd hung around long enough to fall hook line plus huge sinker......

Which gets me through to around now, I needed to take a couple of years away from women, for the sake of just finding out what life was really like alone, plus getting my head around the way i had acted, while in the driving seat and not really caring, I guess its easy enough not to really notice any damage your doing to others..... Once you get the same thing give you a humongous bite on the arse it gives a whole new perspective tho!! yeah it hurts, yeah it screwed me up for about 15 months and yeah now I do finally feel like a fit enough human being to step back into the scene, albeit with a fresh perspective

Now enjoying life for what it is for what it is, also have got my mentality right, by meaning, no I just don't need the jiggy, from what I remember I still LURVE it, but I don't need to desperately chase it, and certainly not over multiple places.....

Not sure if that answers the original question.... hopefully it gives a little clarity tho

Yes this is not an easy question to pinpoint. I would say it is a numbers game. X amount of men want to hold on to their manhood while they are commited, X amount of men do want to loyally commit, and X amount of men are players. I would say the majority want a relationship, but still hold on to their masculinity and independence.

To answer the first part of your question...It means that this age group is afraid of losing their manhood, and they believe that this is what commitment implies. They fight for independence and what to have the liberty to do as they please, hang out with buddies, and not get locked into promises and agendas.
A majority of them are looking for the "perfect" woman...a ready made relationship based on silly expectations their picture of how a relationship should be. When something goes wrong with a woman, it seems easier to leave her and start over with someone new. These men want the relationship to work out, but they also want their freedom. Something a woman has a hard time dealing with, cause most women want to eagerly connect. A good deal of these men who want to hold on to their manhood while in a relationship, will resort to cheating in order to maintain their masculinity and to feel some freedom.

There is a small group of men who do want to loyally commit as well.

Then there are the players who are just looking to rack up the numbers to elevate their coolness.

I would say the majority of men in their mid 30's really do begin to look for a lasting relationship. They want to connect cerebrally/spiritually and settle down. They are past the "playing the field game" as they are looking for a woman to fill certain roles, like wife and mother.

This has been intersting...

Interesting is not even the right word! Thanks a lot to everyone that has replied, especially for the long/detailed answers! Very educating.... I appreciate it greatly, thank you.

When you're that age some men feel the need to have as many girlfriends as possible before they settel and thats depending on how they grew up,what was the surroundings.Alot of relationships are built on nothing but sex and that goes for male or female.For me I began looking for a lasting relationship when I became what I wanted,honesty,loyality things like that.

Are you having guy problems?

Interesting is right...Scoot over I brought more supplies

LOL, you're like my co-workers (guys also) - "need to talk about it????"