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Oh, I'm sure that we are guilty of doing this at certain points - over thinking and analyzing. Sometimes my mind jumps ahead and sometimes in conversations people voice their "dreams/ideas" but it doesn't come to fulfillment. Perhaps its just a natural tendency?

I think that I'm learning to have less expectations and to put the breaks on my mind rushing ahead. Easier said then done - mind you at some points. Think as well, I'm learning to guard my heart/emotions - to not get hooked in .... so if the relationship doesn't work - I'm ok. Been there/done that - where I've had my heart in shreds and I really don't like those emotions.

Truly at this point .... I'd love a relationship, but I also have hesitations considering my circumstances at this time - but in time, I know it will happen. I'm not in a rush - a good relationship takes time to develop and I'd rather have it develop naturally and easily.

I think once we have been hurt we all tend to look for potential warning signs when considering a new relationship which makes us cautious. I dont think it is realistic to place expectations on others. If you meet someone you find you are attracted to give it time and learn about that person, then decide if you feel there can be anykind of future

Maybe there should be more of spontaneity ??

My last relationship was with a man I met online. We e-mailed back and forth just as friends, for months, before we met. If I would of seen his picture up front I probably would of never met him. I got to know him first thru our talks online. He was a great guy and I fell in love with him. We dated over three years. The problem was he didn't fall in love with me. We probably could of went on a lot longer. He was happy with the relationship but I need someone to love me.
Am I an Idiot or what?

no idiots here Sweetie

Yeah you are right.......sure i'm going to die....but not sure whether i'm going to die a lonely old person.....

Happy with my own company and dont see the sense in being with some one just for the sake of not being on your own.....

There are billions of people on this planet and each and every day you only have to look left or right and some one is there to talk to....

I am picky, selective and cautious......I intend to stay that way......

aaaahhhh, Riya, you just hit the nail in the head with that one - not just for me but for many of us i believe.

I think that i am going to sack that little voice in my head and employ you from now on, hahahaahaaa

The point here has to be to give chances and just let things go while being your self. But then again, what is but a more definite way to start breaking people's hearts? people that you like, even more...
Because, if you do not think about those *small* details that would eventually not allow for everything to advance beyond a point, you are just creating a time bomb that will end up in hurt feelings or unfulfilled eagerness...

Take you for example... You are setting up to take a big step in your life and move to a new place. Maybe emotionally you are ready for a steady relationship, but your life's circumstances don’t allow for such a thing to happen at the moment.
So, what do you do every time you spot/meet someone that *feels* that he could be something? Do you initiate / carry on something with a person that is an ocean away? When you know that you will probably be tied up for the next couple of years?

I don’t know about you, but what I am saying here definitely projects to myself as well, because I am in that kind of situation and I have already broken someone’s heart by not giving so much attention to where I *need* to be geographically, and that experience makes me a lot more aware of these things… Maybe much more than I should be…

I don’t give chances, and that’s my problem. I am aware of it. But I know full well that once I initiate something I take it all the way down the road – and that makes me think twice of what will be at the end of this road.

I am picky, selective and cautious......I intend to stay that way......

Hiya Manilito.. u just reminded me of something my Pastor said on Sunday evening.. we had a talk about relationships.. it makes alot of sense... he said we should 'date' with out eyes wide open, and commit with our eyes slightely closed.. and he said it was irresponsible for people to begin a relationship with someone, unless they are sure that there is a potential for distance.. he said that we have a responsibility to other peoples hearts... and it would not be fair for us to leave others hearts in shreds..

yeh, just the men....

Thanks Princess

I qualify. I meet woman, we move in together. I buy her new car and house, I pack bags and move out...

I must be 2 fries short of a Happy Meal..

Too cautious, me? Hardly. I can risk being hurt, because I believe in myself. I can survive. Letting myself love and care for another always adds to me. Even if the relationship doesn't last forever, the love survives in my heart, and I have gained from it.

AND friendship is a good and worthwhile venture.. people undervalue friendship particularly between males and females... ...

I think you do have to have SOME expectations.. even simple things like.. for me.

I want some that doesn't shout or raise their voice at me.. someone I can trust not to hurt me, physically, or intentionally verbally.. some one calm and relaxed.. etc.. I think those are pretty simple.. 'Wants' .. The rest I can see if we decide to take it further.

Thats why I worried about tweaking my profile.. and that it sounded like I wanted or expected too much..
but I don't think I do.. just simple expectations.

Marrrrrrrrrrrrrning!

Thats why I worried about tweaking my profile.. and that it sounded like I wanted or expected too much..
but I don't think I do.. just simple expectations.

The point I make is, GO LIVE YOUR LIFE!!! This is no test kiddies, it is the real thing and it is the only chance we will get.Ask for what you want, and celebrate the no..............