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do you make an inner valuation in you as for the exact reasons? Are you fair in not liking someone?

if i dont like a person i dont like him.her period

no need to make an inner evaluationfor my feelings

the other one could be the most lovable person, but if i dont like him.her i dont like him.her period

I feel I pretty much know what I like and don't like, but I don't make an immediate decision....I tend to expect to like most people I meet,then as I get to know them better, I learn if they are someone I like a little or a lot. The ones I learn I don't like, it's generally because of their behavior toward others or toward the world...it is probably in conflict with my own values and perspective to a point I cann't respect them. Basically, respecting someone is the essentially ingredient in whether or not I like them.

Someone who clashes in values with you, you don't like. I see...
Do you like people with different values than your though?

why will you quote some one when you have nothing to say?

Some people are "difficult" and have a way of getting under your skin, so to speak.
I may not like the way the person thinks and some, I think they have their brain on backwards, but I too used to be that way. I was very ignorant of everything! I call it "Stinkin Thinkin!"
I have learned that it is okay to disagree and I do not even have to tell them I disagree. With some, I let them believe that their way of thinking is right, even if I know better, to save argument. For some reason, the very difficult just love to argue in their ignorance. It's a waste of time. I prefer to keep the peace.
If a person is not receptive, you keep your thoughts to yourself and wait for another time, when there will be an open door to share what you believe to be true. Then, you only give them tid-bit, (never be pushy). Next time, a little bit more. Until one day, they "get it" and have a new way of looking at things.
So I believe in liking everyone, especially the unlikable, as a challenge keeps you on your toes!

People may have different 'values'...for example, I have a friend who is really into money and luxury...her husband is a doctor and he makes a lot of money and she spends a lot of her time spending it and they want the 'best' of everything. This is really in contrast to my values about money....but she is a decent person...she treats other people with respect and is kind and thoughtful...I don't need someone to totally agree with me on every issue...I just need to be able to respect someone for me to like them

Good thread Cristina

No. No inner valuations.

If I don't like somebody it is likely to be from the onset. Instinctively. It is an aura.

And I would not be interested in the least to find out why.

On the other hand, somebody i do like, I would make all possible efforts to get to know them better.

I guess I'm just an optimist. I like everyone unless they give me a reason do dislike them. Variety is wonderful!

Healthy, i think you are referring to how you deal with people that don't share the same views and with the ones who are stubburn and limited.

You don't really like everyone who is intelligent and open minded do you?
For instance, there are people here who don't like other's just because a person has a trouble with her/his friend...in this case, do you think this reason suffices?
Like, when i see someone and feel like hidding ( i don't do that )...do you afterwards make an analyses on the reasons why you felt like hidding? I think making such reflections, makes it a better world because then you may find out whether you acted fairly...you don't always have to realize it JUST when others condemn your attitude! That's my point linked to "plastic people" thread

wonderful Woody

thx

Exactly my doll, we don't need people to agree with us, otherwise we only have one view, but respect other people's choice is very important...
If their choices interfere with yours in a negative way, no need to keep those. It's just bad energy.

does instinct have a correlation with rationality?

Hi cristina
I like to think im fair in my reasons for not liking someone.....give everyone a fair chance... people can get off on the wrong footing.... it happens even here.. tempers flare up things are said in the heat of the moment but that doesnt mean its a reason to dislike someone... but if they kept doing it.. well that would be it for me... no liking them then lol... xx great thread.. K

I used to have the fastest evaluations of someone as likable or not. The thing is I used to be so bloody judgemental (with all the screwed up mechanisms it involves) I have mellowed a lot (or put myself in soul therapy) so now though I can still feel when I like someone or not then I try not to spend much time in that. I think it is most important to use that time in mending one´s inner shit just to be liked the most by oneself (with nothing of narcisism in this statement)

I still think though you need to evaluate. The older, the pickier and the greater olfatory sense too.

Complicate subject