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Don't think that the world or society will ever be Pleasantville ......... too many flaws in our social systems and truly too many apathetic people who don't want to get involved.

In saying that, there are many who do get involved and help out - unfortunately there is little or no support when this happens. Families who step up to the plate and take over when another family member is failing don't face any less burden then those who assist a stranger. When we see someone being neglected, abused etc. what is your action? Do you step up to the plate and assist or do you step back, shake your head and think .... poor kid?

Its not just the parents who are at fault ......... its our society in general and that includes everyone of us. So that leaves the question - what are you doing to make a difference?

I think the best thing we parents could do, would be to get rid of all electronic babysitters, kids on computers, tv's and video games.

we didn't have 1/3 of these problems when family's actually took time to eat together, sit and talk and play games together. quality time.

But also teach our kids, get them involved in what make the world a good place. teach them how to cook, do laundry, carpentry and everything else.. work side by side to teach them, then they actually learn to enjoy doing all of this stuff.

I worked in a nursing home for years, when my son was 13 he decided that he wanted to do volunteer work at the home, he ended up working 2 hours every night after school, He loved it, got to understand the older folks and learned to listen and learn from them.

Yes i agree to many electronic devices....

We as children when we were young..we got out and played...and explored..

We could only watch a little tv and that was it....

My youngest loves to help me cook...

He helps with the vaccuming..he just loves it....

And i tell him i am proud of him...and he did a good job..

awww thanks....

I gave my kids self worth, respect and a whole lotta loving, that worked both ways i got the same from them.....but also take responsiblity for their actions...our home was a mini hostel sometimes with the amount of kids i have claiming me as their mam..... remember we had not a lot of money but we were rich in lifes values..... yes they do fight but are there for each other when times get tough.....

an attempt at a cop out?
Yes.............. The parents are the most accountable!
Especially in these times when we know full well how f*&^ed up people are.

But yes..... Others need to be involved.. but how many really have good-clear thinking ability?

I often step in, weather it be a man abusing his wife or his kids.
I have gotten in the mix of all of it. and not just calling the cops. but also in person.
but this is very thin ice and one has to know what they are doing and not just be mouthy... have to be able to see the entire situation and understand what can happen.
one wrong word and they can then begin to better hide what they are doing.

Example: Young family here, they have 2 very small kids and a pit bull.
recently the pit bull was gone, the father immediately started yelling at the kids for letting the dog loose.
the girl about 5 kept saying that the bot 4 had let the dog loose.
the father spanked the boy so badly for this. right out in the front yard.
he didn't even attempt to ask the boy if it was true or why or listen at all.
I sat there thinking it over,,,
about 15 minutes later, the fathers brother pulled up out front with the dog in his car, He had come over and took the dog without telling anyone, to walk him in the park.

after he left I ask the father if I could talk to him, so he came over and I had over an hr chat about how he needs to relax and listen to his kids and so on and so on.

I think that is one of the biggest things we can do... Praise them!!
Not just point out what they do wrong.

The kids need a sense of worth while, accomplishment and hope... not the doom and gloom and despair, they need useful things to do to fill the time.

This is so true for kids of all ages but particularly teens.

BUT........... most people these days wait till their kids are teens.

Can't do that.
To form good habits, we must start when they are very little.

examples:
very small kids.. do not pick up their toys for them, make it a rule from the start, when you are done playing with a toy.. put it where it belongs.
Do not allow them to just leave them for you to pick up.

kids from 6 and up... parent wash the dishes the kid can dry and put them away,, or at least as much as they can reach,,
2. they can do the pet feeding and clean the litter box.
3. they can pick up the trash & sticks from the yard.

and so on.
may not be a lot required, but it is instilling responsibility and self worth.
good purpose.

I don't have any child but what i know my child will give me a second life

I did all that with mine, (and other people's) for nearly 30 years now. I just took that as a given. Responsibility from a very early age is very important. I just meant that teens don't actually have a fully functioning brain and it is important to give them focus and keep them busy. Boredom and lack of focus in teen years is very destructive to a developing mind.

Last time I came on here and mentioned anything to do with my kids, biological and fostered, I got torn apart so I have tended not to say too much. (Someone with a grudge, who knew nothing about me or my family, that I had censored). I will say, however, that all mine and the ones I have fostered have been through college and are productive and genuinely big hearted human beings and I am very proud of all of them. I am particularly proud of my own children , who were willing to share their mother and lives with a less fortunate child, over and over again. I think it all comes down to a set of values that reflect decency.

Well done Ginger and i agree with you 100%....... hold your head up high with pride as there are many kids apart from your own that you have given a great start in life too.......

Thank you for that Nuala. It means a lot to me that someone understands. You are a kind lady.

Thank you too.....and i meant what i said.....

so you the great libetarian who believes all should have opinions, advocates censorship when others express there's from close observation not complete ignorance you claim. You exagerate by claiming vendetts, grudges. You think ( wrongly) that you are an oracle of all knowledge, your certainly far from that. Read your own pompous "know it all" posts

Well since I go without and my kids don't....I guess you could say they are my life...yeah...

She and her kids were my life too.

Probably the only time I will ever feel like a father figure since I have no kids of my own. It was wonderful while it lasted. I grew to love her 2 boys, and they loved me too.

Suzy is a terrific mother who would do anything for her kids. I was witness to that 1st hand.

I hope and pray she and her kids are doing well...