Connecting Singles^® Forums100% Free Online Dating

I wonder whether sites like 'Connecting Singles' are part of the cure, as much palliative as they are a practical resource for the dateless?

I mean, there's claimed evidence that free sites such as this carry nowhere near the weight of accountability members of pay sites feel.

On sites that charge fees, especially those that don't give free sessions to females, there's more motivation for real and genuine effort and contact.

After all, people on those sites are paying up front and expecting a result. They are prepared to put effort in.

Connecting Singles must, of course, have a fruitful component, and yet the evidence here, seemingly more among women who statically fall more easily in love than men, but are swifter to abandon it. Men, it’s claimed, are the reverse of this.

Some CS members make it clear in their profiles that they don’t intend to treat CS as a dating site, but a ‘chat room’. These members seem all to be women. Similarly those who stop a fraction short of cynicism in their profiles when they declare ahead of dipping in that they don’t really “expect” to meet their match, their “soulmate”, their future partner here.

So CS serves as a sort of staging post, a transitional playroom for people who for whatever reason don’t have a demanding social life or who prefer the relative safety or anonymity of internet ‘chatting’.

Connecting Singles then is as much casual and a bit of fun as it purports to be serious. Yet there are evidently no serious expectations among those who treat the site primarily as a chat room

No so those who pay for a dating site.

They are either not interested in "chat rooms" or they go elsewhere to "chat".

Nothing wrong with that.

So, perhaps while working through the recovery process of a breakup, it's valuable to be able to ease gently back into single life through the near virtual reality of a site like Connecting Singles. There's less chance of engaging with someone in real life, and therefore less premature stress, risk of further hurt or damaged expectations.

In that sense, is 'Connecting Singles' performing a transitional function?

Is it also a ‘Safe House’ for the emotionally injured?


- Wylde



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If connecting singles could afford to advertise it would be the best dating site on the net.

To the OP... I don't really understand what you mean when you said..

"Those who pay for a dating site. They are either not interested in "chat rooms" or they go elsewhere to "chat". Because, I know on some of the paying chatrooms there are also forums and chatrooms.

I do agree that it could be true that some people use CS as a way of easing themselves gradually back into the dating scene from behind the safety of their monitor or whichever way you worded it.

As for the people (majority women) who you say state in their profiles they are only here to treat the site as a "chat room". I think many of these put that rather than say they are here for dating. I know everytime I state in my profile I am looking for dating that I just get bombarded with proposals from men I wouldn't be seen dead with let alone be seen out in public with

As for it being a sort of "halfway" house for the "emotionally insane I mean injured" types around here... You could be right

I am currently residing in the extra padded cell in the basement nursing my and on the forums until I feel prepared to live in the real world rather than a virtual world

Finding myself in a new country with a new job and suddenly single almost a year ago, I am sorry to say I only found this website last week.

There is no way I would 'pay' to chat to others and this seems the perfect medium to chat to new friends.

Mark

haha I like that ::logged and noted::

When I joined CS, I was seriously looking for dates, a relationship, etc.

After years of being a member, I gave up thinking that I would ever get a date off the site

I find a bit of social contact through the forums.

Even if I never meet anyone here, it serves to at least give me some entertainment.

And I can PRETEND that I have a social life

it is e-life
and you can have e-dates every day
and have e-dinners every day

while at the same time you can learn the games men play

this is exactly what i'm thinking

This is a well written and sound OP It certainly gave alot of valid points in which to ponder...... and I would have to agree with it on most if not all points....

As with all situations where human interactions occur..... in real life, or cyber life, opportunities are what you make them, and limited only by your own resolve, and imagination, to achieve that for which you originally came to this site.... whether it be to chat, or to find the special someone we all hope to find in our lives........

No way I'm paying to talk to people, and the guys that do, well I've checked out some of the paying sites, and they just seem a little desperate. I've met IRL some people from this site, so it works just fine IMO.

To the OP, I think you're overthinking things a bit. How about just having some fun, is there anything wrong with that?

noting wrong with it

and there are plenty of no paying forums sites

as the dating site this one is, the forums should not be a place where people have fun teasing strangers that want to be serious

in those free chat forums you can teas all what you want your own friends

it is not fun when some one want to have a serious topic that many people come to the thread and start talking among them

there are the chatrooms here in CS for that pourpuse

yes, to have fun is good
but there are places where to have fun and where not to have fun

I have not been o other dating sites. So I am ot sure how they all work or don't work. But to give my opinion. CS is a place where you can join forums and chat, with people who are in the same boat. You have better understanding from someone who has been thru the same things. And in most cases you are more able to talk about things here, you would never be able to talk about with just anyone.
Are we here for dating, or just the forums? Both thru the forums and chat, we are getting our group therapy, as well as learning more about our selves, and each other. Plus we see the people we have more in common with. and we make friends. And we sometimes fall in love. The way I see CS, is a place where I can heal my cuts, become a better person, and maybe along the way help someone who has been thru a lot of what I have. And just maybe because we have all suffered one thing or another there is someone who is looking for the same things as I do, but will have the pateints and understanding that someone in a bar would not have.
I am here for both, but if one doesnt happen, then I still have good friends that uderstand, and are there with a shoulder, or a word of advice, or just to make me laugh.
The truth is, if we came here looking for love, we found it in everyone here.

At the end of the day, my world is a little smaller, and hey, the price is right.

Well, almost everyone

you are not missing anything

CS is by far the best dating site i have seen
althought i might have lots of disagreement here, people are more open to welcome other here

CS is ofering to this comunity things that no others site are doing

if we succed to use the proper tools CS provide us we can make this wonderful site, even better

BRAVO!!!!

Came back to see friends and make new ones...best decision I made in months!!! It helps.

CS as a kind of halfway house for love? I liked your analysis, Wylde.

CS can and has worked for a small number of people in terms of helping them find serious relationships. I'm one of them. But I think it is heavily biased toward a certain age-range (which I happily happen to fall within), and would prove far less effective for those who fall outside that range. Of course, by the very nature of demographics, people in more populous locations (e.g., the States) are more likely to find a match than people in less populated areas. Also, Americans residing in foreign countries, I think, are far less likely to find their match.

Well, Wylde, I only found cs after I had given up on paying dating sites and have always used it more as a friendship site.
I have a social life as well as a cyber one, as do many here.
As to the transitional function, I really think most of us are in a that, the majority of us are learning, changing, comes to terms, moving on or whatever all the time, growing as people within and without.