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Tell me funny stories and jokes as i need to lift my spirits. I hate beeing down its not me.

My new pic has brought me a heaps of mail from 18yr olds..

its working!


NOT!

Cheer ya up?? Give ya a laugh, Mair?? Okay....

Did ya hear the one about the New Zealand guy, went into a bar.... Thought he was on a date??

Somehow I think ya know the punch-line, love.... don't ya??!!

18 yr old pin up girl work it baby

Q: What do you call a midget fortuneteller on the run from the law?

A: A small medium at large.

I have been Scammed all day..

maybe time to put a picture up likes ur Claire

That's because you look so young and beautiful.


Mair, thats what you should do, take a pic like Claires and get a bunch of sexy email from 18yo. That should cheer you up.


My daughter (and I) thought you were in your late 20's when we first saw your pics. You put some boobs out there like claire, you'll pass for 21.

Now i needed that, I was eating a crisp and i nearly choked. Lager shampoo is great for the hair i hear

in the pitch black.. to a deaf and blind person with no sense of touch.. yeah.. I would then.

in RL.. believe me.. I look my age

Don't laugh the only mail i receive, other from friends are from under 35 yr olds and they usually all Irish or English

Wabbits


A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks, in the sweetest
little lisp, between two missing teeth,

"Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?"

As the shopkeeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he's on her level and asks,

"Do you want a widdle white wabbit, or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabbit, or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabbit over there?"

She, in turn, blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees,
leans forward and says, in a tiny quiet voice,

"I don't think my python weally gives a thit."

Glad it gave ya a chuckle, love..... worked for me!! Strange though.... he just couldn't see the funny side...??!!

This should help a bit


A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says,

"Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!"

Ok this can only happen in Ireland....right...

I went to Waterford citly last weekend for my daughter's hen party....Last saturday morning we decided to see some of the city....we came to what they call the square in the city and off the square leads about 6 side street .....so passing thru the square we saw a band play and god help them.....they looked as if they were out of a happy farm, playing away little tunes....anyway off one of the side street is a church where a wedding was going on....we went into a shop and had a look around came back out.....next we hear fire engines sirens and look to see Boot's is on fire....sure that straight across from the church where the poor bride and groom is emerging......they are bundled into their fancy car and sent packing....the firemen tackle the fire in Boots.....and thru all this mayhem the band played on.....Well me, my sister and 3 pals nearly wet ourselves watching all this.....only in Ireland can this be.....

Tee hee...!!!